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  1. #11
    namelesswonder's Avatar
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    Boyfriend and I were splitting the cooking responsibilities when we first moved in together (and I was only a few months primal). Sometimes that meant just leaving out the soy sauce in the fried rice, sometimes that meant cooking sweet potatoes with the regular potatoes (though I eat regular potatoes now). When I cooked, that meant spaghetti squash for me and regular spaghetti for him. Eventually, HE complained about the effort of making things differently, so now we eat the same primal dinners I'm still trying to figure out ways to get him to eat more primal lunches or breakfasts (because ramen for lunch and then in the middle of the night is NOT NUTRITIOUS DAMMIT). He does like to cook.

    Make sure she understands that you need to eat a certain way for your health. Hopefully she will respect that. If she's not going to cook things that work for you, you'll just have to cook for yourself. I'm not saying it won't be a hassle, but it might be the only way you can get a good meal.

    What the hell does SHE eat? In general, it's pretty unreasonable (in my opinion) for her to expect to cater to her dietary "needs" and desires, without contributing to meal creation herself.
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  2. #12
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    By the way, I do cook for my husband, who is not a fan of meat. I usually make him fish and then we share side dishes. Last night I made him almond crusted flounder with a lemon butter sauce, roasted squash and a big ass salad. He had exactly no complaints and thought of it as the best meal ever. 100% primal.

  3. #13
    Anna Katherine's Avatar
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    Uhm, you cook. If she doesn't like what you have cooked, she can go and get her own food.
    "Though she be but little, she is fierce!" - William Shakespeare

    http://www.marksdailyapple.com/forum...tml#post964333 (My journal)

  4. #14
    Sandra in BC's Avatar
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    Who cooked your food before she moved in?

    Did neither of you consider these details before shacking up? How well do you really know each other?
    Sandra
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    There are no cheat days. There are days when you eat primal and days you don't. As soon as you label a day a cheat day, you're on a diet. Don't be on a diet. ~~ Fernaldo

    DAINTY CAN KISS MY PRIMAL BACKSIDE. ~~ Crabcakes

  5. #15
    Westly's Avatar
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    Hey all!

    I've been with her for six or seven years now, and I cooked my own food previously. (Which is why I was able to stick so well to Primal!) but when she moved in near the beginning of the year, she said that she would prepare the meals. I told her that I'd really like to stick to Primal, and she says "Oh, well, a few potatoes aren't going to kill you." and "It's just a little sugar in the chicken!" (WTF?) (And by a little she means about a quarter cup.) And "I've set out some pound cake for you, eat it before it goes bad." She doesn't take what I'm doing seriously, because to her, it's not serious.

    I've been doing my part. I generally make a lot of crock-pot meals (Because WF has been having a lot of stellar sales on roasts!) I bake my own fish (She hates fish) pan fry my own scallops, make my own soups (Typically a from scratch chicken coconut curry with home made stock), roll my own meatballs, and do all of the grilling. I make quite a bit of my own food, but she also eats a lot earlier than I do (She needs to eat around 5-6PM) and I don't even get home from work until around 7 or 8, so she makes extra of whatever she's eating, and expects me to eat it before it 'goes bad'. She doesn't like eating leftovers. I've got a bit of a hangup about food going to waste (Comes from being poor as a teenager) so I tend to finish off things she doesn't eat as well.

    I would love it if she'd buy her own food, but, currently, I'm the only one with a job, and I buy all the food. She gets sick if she doesn't eat the foods she likes (Which, interestingly enough, MAKE HER SICK!!) and I think it's pretty much a case of "I want you to be like me."

    Thanks for all your suggestions, folks! I'm going to be eating more fish (It's really cheap here in Cali) and sticking to strictly making my own meals. It's just really financially difficult to be funding both Primal and SAD. ;_;
    Down from 275 to 250!
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  6. #16
    namelesswonder's Avatar
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    Are you sure you enforced the seriousness of your diet to her? If she expects you to eat something you cannot, it either means she is not respecting your choices or doesn't understand them. "Eat this before it goes bad" sounds like not understanding (mostly because I would hate to think she doesn't GAF about your health). She's going to either need to make you-friendly meals, or eat some friggin' leftovers, ESPECIALLY since you are the one with the job.

    Also, yeah, I am the bacon-bringer in my house. Boyfriend eats Primal dinners and ramen for lunch. I would rather spend more on OTHER SAD things than have him eat ramen, but he makes a fuss about he money and won't suggest other things I can get him when I try to find something else I can buy him. Gotta compromise somewhere.
    Journal on depression/anxiety
    Currently trying to figure out WTF to eat (for IBS-C).

  7. #17
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    hold on, so she stays with you, doesn't have a job, and is a picky eater? is she contributing to the household any other way?

  8. #18
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jer37208 View Post
    hold on, so she stays with you, doesn't have a job, and is a picky eater? is she contributing to the household any other way?

    She better be able to suck a mean di....oh nevermind. not my business anyway.

  9. #19
    Nady's Avatar
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    Tell her not to make extra unless she intends to eat it. JMO, but this lack of respect for your food preferences is a big red flag to me~ this girlfriend isn't a life partner, unless you want to always play this power game. What would happen if you needed to eat a certain way due to a medical condition?

  10. #20
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    Quote Originally Posted by Westly View Post
    Hey there everyone!

    How have you been?

    Things have not been well in the land of the werewolf. ;_;

    I was swimming along just dandily, and then...Life totally got in the way. I was 95% primal, doing all kinds of (Beginner level) Convict conditioning... I was down over 35lbs!

    And then...well, my girlfriend moved in.

    My girlfriend doesn't like to cook. She doesn't like fish. She doesn't like seafood. She doesn't know how to grill, and refuses to learn (If she refuses to learn, she never has to do it!) She doesn't know how to broil, she insists there needs to be bread and potatoes in everything...

    Cue depression.

    I quit eating primal, I gave in to her demands for fast food, ice cream...and indulged myself.

    Now I'm back to where I was before, and...I don't want to be here!!

    So, I'm going to try to get back. Some words of encouragement are totally needed, everyone! My life has not been good for some time, and I could totally use some gentle get back on the horse. (Is the horse delicious? Can I eat it?)

    I hope you all remember me! I'm gonna try to become an active member again!

    I've got the PB on my Kindle, and I'm reading the Omnivore's Dilema. Good to see you all again!
    Starry-eyed love (lust) took over and you were temporarily derailed. It happens. For some it is the holidays or stress or just the thought that a little bit won't hurt... as you see, it can.

    She cannot demand you to eat anything you don't want to eat, my dear. If she does, then I think there is a problem. Both of you should be loving to explore what the other loves. It is her turn to indulge you! Start that blog up again. At one time you were so motivated and so proud and so content that you wrote about it. Do it again! Write; be cathartic about it. It will come back to you as the good healthy body comes back.

    You can live Primal in the same household with a nonPrimal if they shut up and let you be. Don't just try to get back... get back on that horse! Don't eat it; a dead horse won't be that fun to ride.

    Age 48
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    "In health there is freedom. Health is the first of all liberties."
    Henri Frederic Amiel

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