Giving up on husband page 7

[Alex Good]

So what do you think I should do. My partner has a passive aggressive streak. We saw oysters at the farmers market a while ago so we made a special trip to get a shucker. Today I brought home some oysters. But instead of being enthused, he made a face and said he'll watch me eat them. So I put chicken in the oven and I'll make the oysters too. I thought I would be my usual nice self and if he decides he'd like oysters he can have half and I'll have half the chicken. But now I'm thinking I should just have all the oysters to myself and let him suffer for his earlier rudeness making a face of disgust at me. What would you do?

Wait, that counts as passive aggressive?

[jojohaligo]

. But he said to me, "I now realize you are not 'healthy' but are rather, slowly wasting away. You are killing yourself. I hope you're happy."

I suppose you could ask him how what he's doing is working for him...

And I read the OPs post as a comment on she has given up trying to convince him.

I am just happy that when I decided to follow the PB, and I presented the idea and thinking to my partner, he was on board he said, if it would help me. Sometimes this guy drives me absolutely crazy, but other times he is just so great. The only thing he hasn't given up is those gluten free Mary's crackers. He must eat half a box with almond butter every day, but he's not fat anyway so who cares.

[Sabine]

Okay, sbhikes, just thinking about it from another perspective: maybe he's considering the idea that oysters are considered aphrodisiacs, and the thought of watching you eat a whole plateful makes him happy.

Or maybe he's just a food sissy.

I hope it is the first.

[cori93437]

eat the fcking oysters, he's a big boy and can get his own

This.

[sbhikes]

Okay so what I did was I gave him one oyster and ate all the rest myself. That way he knew what he was missing. And he was missing out, that's for sure. I broiled them rather than eat them raw. I topped them with butter mixed with shallots, cilantro and rooster sauce and broiled them. They were delicious!

[Hawk]

I found the Paleo Life style and began to research. My blood sugar was rising. I have an apple body. I did body for life and became a fat strong person. I stopped because my blood sugar was just going up. I found Marks daily apple. I showed my husband the pictures. He was impressed. I told him I was going to be my own guinea pig. I have tried many diets with out success...why should he believe this one will work? After 3 weeks I got really dizzy. My BP was low. My doc told me to cut my meds in half. Two weeks later I was off of it. After about 2 months, my husband commented that he noticed I was not using my inhalers. I got headaches less often.I can breathe easier. I fix the big salads with meat at lunch, and meat and steamed veggies at dinner. Eggs and nitrate free bacon at breakfast. I kept researching and walking and soon lost 20 pounds. My knees stopped hurting. I began to paddle board and am up to 4 miles a day around out lakes. . I have dropped two sizes in jeans. Lost 5 inches around my belly. My husband still drinks a couple glasses of red wine at night. I cannot because of my allergy to sulfates and alcohol. He gradually switched from potato chips to pistachios and other nuts. I never said a word. He just noticed how much better I am doing. I would never want someone to try and pressure me to eat in a way the seems strange, so I never pressured him. I just made interesting foods. He loves the pizza that I make in a pepper instead of on a crust. I eat mine with no cheese. He eats cheese. I am now wondering what it will feel like to be back to the weight I was in my 20's.I am sure I will get there. I am starting to lift weights again this week. I get nothing but encouragement. As he sees the changes in my health, he (with out any prompting from me) has gradually moved in my direction. I need to prove that this works before I preach it. When my new blood tests come back with great results, we will see what the reaction is. I am excited for the first time in my life. I have friends to work out with. He did buy a second paddle board, and has gone a couple times. He wants to sell our house and buy a few acres to raise chickens and a garden. I'd say that with out any pressure at all, My guy is looking out for my best interest. I am blessed.

[NZ primal Gwamma]

Hawk - you are truely blessed. Good luck and I so hope that my man will come on board one day soon.
G

[doublehelix]

I've found the relationship between husbands and wives are tricky things... full of all kinds of power struggles that have nothing to do with the topic at hand. And sometimes, even though your spouse is not openly agreeing with you, they MAY be taking things in. Seeing your health improve, seeing you lose weight, etc. And down the road, your good example may influence them down the path to good health. But it needs to be a silent example.

I hope you and your husband can find a path to health together.

Voice of reason. I bet a lot of people have been on every diet in the world, so to the guy, this is just another diet and feels controlling.

[doublehelix]

I suppose you could ask him how what he's doing is working for him...

And I read the OPs post as a comment on she has given up trying to convince him.

I am just happy that when I decided to follow the PB, and I presented the idea and thinking to my partner, he was on board he said, if it would help me. Sometimes this guy drives me absolutely crazy, but other times he is just so great. The only thing he hasn't given up is those gluten free Mary's crackers. He must eat half a box with almond butter every day, but he's not fat anyway so who cares.

Why ask him to justify what he is doing? That's going to put him on the defense.
He won't think this is something good if he thinks he has to validate things.

[Damiana]

If you're no longer attracted to him due to his lifestyle making him prematurely fat/old, tell him so. That would be a pretty big wake up call, I imagine.