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Thread: Time for something else, I think

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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Jun 2012
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    Time for something else, I think

    I started PB on May 21st of this year, weighing 186.6 lbs (5' 2") and feeling like primal offered the most reasonable answer to fixing that. I managed through following the diet to drop to 168.4 lbs by the first week of September, but my weight is creeping back up, even though I'm still doing everything right. I'm at 173.0 lbs this morning, having lost nearly a month of progress in three days. No explanation. I keep my calories in check (1300-1650). I have a physically demanding job that leaves me shaking with exhaustion on my way home a couple times each week, and yet I still manage to do as much of the pathetic pantywaist playtime bullshit as possible, although that will now stop in favor of real exercise.

    I do not care about the purported health benefits of PB. Don't sell me on that. I'm willing to die ten years sooner, if only I can live thin in the meantime. I seriously do not care about any of that. I just want weight loss. Nothing else. As a Type I diabetic, diagnosed at age five, I feel like this diet may be utterly unsuitable for the condition in terms of losing anything more than water weight.

    I really believed in this diet. No, it's not a lifestyle. It's just a very strict, incredibly bourgeois version of South Beach, which I once lost 30 lbs on, but could keep off because I couldn't eat bland food forever. I'm good at carb restriction when I'm motivated and feel like I'm making progress toward my one true goal: serious weight loss.

    So here we go. I'm giving up PB at the beginning of October. I need to find another diet to switch to since I can't go back to eating gluten (the lack of brain fog helps me at work), but I want something that will give me the body I need to have a happy, good, worthwhile life. Any suggestions for something to try?

  2. #2
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    Aug 2012
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    Out of interest, where did you arrive at the 1300-1650 cals per day? This lifestyle works great for a lot of people, so demeaning it as 'bullshit' is not that helpful or necessary.

    Be interested to know how many hours of exercise you did a week, what sort of exertion levels your work requires etc. 1300 cals per day seems exceptionally low for almost anyone.

    Not judging your efforts, just be nice to see if there is anything obvious that has prevented you from reaching your goals. Stress is one such issue that sounds like it might play a part, particularly in your work life.

    Anyway, good luck with whatever you move onto next.

  3. #3
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    Quote Originally Posted by PureFunctionalFitness View Post
    Out of interest, where did you arrive at the 1300-1650 cals per day?
    Thanks for the question. My BMR is 1550 cals. It's impossible to eat exactly that (and hope all extra energy expended goes toward weight loss), so I use the range of 1300 - 1650 cals to stay under my BMR most of the time. I'm usually not ragingly hungry, but around mealtimes I'm ready to eat.

  4. #4
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    Mar 2012
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    I agree with PFF, maybe your calorie count is too low, or your stress is to high, or maybe a mix of the two.

    No eating plan works for everyone, being mad a PB isn't going to help. Maybe you are reacting to something (dairy, fruit-some can't eat fruit raw, eggs, or something else).

    I hope you find something that works for you.

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Sep 2012
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    Midwest
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    Alright parrottrl,

    let me remind you of something you posted on your first forum post:
    "Seriously, the emotional aspect of PB has really shocked me. I had never realized how much I just didn't care (about anything) before."

    You are not at that calm emotional place anymore. From what I've read in your journal you have a high stress job, a high stress boyfriend, and your mind is following your body to the breaking point. You've been using your journal to beat yourself up instead of congratulate yourself on the progress you made. 15 pounds in 4 months with a broken body and a high-stress life? Seriously. I'd love to have that kind of progress.

    If you want higher intensity workouts, join a Crossfit or start running if you want or do serious weights. What does your body respond best to? Take bodyfat measurements instead of poundage. n=1

    As a diabetic you'll be avoiding sugar, you're already avoiding gluten. Geez, anything you do on top of that is pretty much going to be primal. Primal is anything but "strict." Go visit the paleo forums if you want to see what strict is all about. Maybe you'll thrive on super-strict. Who knows. Try it out.

    But most of all, find a way to chill. You are wound up tighter than a ball of rubber bands.

  6. #6
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    Jun 2012
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    Quote Originally Posted by sarasue624 View Post
    But most of all, find a way to chill. You are wound up tighter than a ball of rubber bands.
    None of the primal-approved ways to chill work for me. Working out leaves me seething with rage. Play, even more so because it's so time-wasting and juvenile. Mediation makes me bored, anxious, antsy, and tends to focus me on the bitter aspects of my life and life in general. I'm too poor to do CrossFit and have trouble finding a safe place to run (and build up my rage while doing it).

    I cannot relax anymore. I'm in graduate school, my boyfriend moved in, I have a dog and a job that is far from ideal. I have completely lost the things I truly loved doing - video gaming, reading, writing - in favor of too much other people, other obligations in my life. I'll never get them back, because when I finish school, I'll have to work even harder, put in more hours to advance my career, so I can make enough money to take care of an aging partner.

    All I want is to be thin so I can at least feel confident and be comfortable with myself while doing all of this.

  7. #7
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    Quote Originally Posted by parrottrl View Post
    None of the primal-approved ways to chill work for me. Working out leaves me seething with rage. Play, even more so because it's so time-wasting and juvenile. Mediation makes me bored, anxious, antsy, and tends to focus me on the bitter aspects of my life and life in general. I'm too poor to do CrossFit and have trouble finding a safe place to run (and build up my rage while doing it).

    I cannot relax anymore. I'm in graduate school, my boyfriend moved in, I have a dog and a job that is far from ideal. I have completely lost the things I truly loved doing - video gaming, reading, writing - in favor of too much other people, other obligations in my life. I'll never get them back, because when I finish school, I'll have to work even harder, put in more hours to advance my career, so I can make enough money to take care of an aging partner.

    All I want is to be thin so I can at least feel confident and be comfortable with myself while doing all of this.
    I am almost in tears reading all this stuff that you are finding hard, stressful, juvenile etc...
    I am yelling now. STOP !!!!! AND SMELL THE ROSES GIRL !!!!!!!!
    Chillax, sit down, and prioritize your life. Work out what is truely important - top of the list, not so important down the list.
    Tackle each one - one at a time, but not all of them at once !
    If its weight loss you are after - you are in the right forum. I am not going to give you a blow by blow of my life, but believe you me - I have had major issues with weight loss, and it WAS at the top of my list (not any more).
    Personally I think relaxing is the first thing you need to tackle.
    Get reading the more experienced senior members journals, maybe private message the odd one, but do not give up.
    If its gaming or reading you enjoy, cut some of the less important things out of your day, and add in a RELAXING passtime.
    but i beg you - you will regret going back to where you have been,
    however i am just having a senior moment, and at the end of the day - you have some choices.
    Good luck and keep us posted
    Gwamma
    "never let the truth get in the way of a good story "

    ...small steps....

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Apr 2010
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    Quote Originally Posted by parrottrl View Post
    Mediation makes me bored, anxious, antsy, and tends to focus me on the bitter aspects of my life and life in general.
    Everything makes you mad.

    You have a ton of obligations that you set yourself up for, which make you mad and resentful.

    But you think that 'being thin' is going to truly make you happy?

    See your comment about meditation? That's what it's supposed to do. Introspection isn't all rainbows and happiness and insta-enlightenment. It hurts. I've done it, and I continue to do it. It's amazing what bubbles up from the depths - but you have to re-experience it and move on, not pack it back in there like overstuffing a pillowcase.

    Until you peel those layers away, you could even lose 50 more lbs, but you're still going to be miserable.

  9. #9
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    Apr 2011
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    Easton, PA
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    Quote Originally Posted by HotRodKristina View Post
    Everything makes you mad.

    You have a ton of obligations that you set yourself up for, which make you mad and resentful.

    But you think that 'being thin' is going to truly make you happy?

    See your comment about meditation? That's what it's supposed to do. Introspection isn't all rainbows and happiness and insta-enlightenment. It hurts. I've done it, and I continue to do it. It's amazing what bubbles up from the depths - but you have to re-experience it and move on, not pack it back in there like overstuffing a pillowcase.

    Until you peel those layers away, you could even lose 50 more lbs, but you're still going to be miserable.
    HRK is right. I'm reading your posts, and you are so unhappy, babe. It's not going to get better because you are thinner. I lived a life of hurt and anger. I starved myself to thin -- really thin. I looked great. And guess what: I still made poor choices and was ridiculously unhappy. I've had two horrible marriages, during both of which I suffered abuse and/or neglect. But I looked great while doing it! I've worked four jobs, gotten four degrees, and ended up suicidal.

    Please consider the suggestion of getting some good counseling. There are many affordable options out there. You need to value yourself -- love yourself -- enough to want more than just a pants size. You are worth so much more than that. But you've boiled your beliefs down into what you weigh, and shoved aside any happiness or joy you might ever have.

    Your frustration isn't about being Paleo/Primal -- it's about everything else in your life. When you move on to something else, you'll offload that frustration onto the next thing that allows you to avoid dealing with the real problem: your self-value.

  10. #10
    Join Date
    May 2010
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    Phoenix, AZ
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    1,883
    Quote Originally Posted by parrottrl View Post
    None of the primal-approved ways to chill work for me. Working out leaves me seething with rage. Play, even more so because it's so time-wasting and juvenile. Mediation makes me bored, anxious, antsy, and tends to focus me on the bitter aspects of my life and life in general. I'm too poor to do CrossFit and have trouble finding a safe place to run (and build up my rage while doing it).

    I cannot relax anymore. I'm in graduate school, my boyfriend moved in, I have a dog and a job that is far from ideal. I have completely lost the things I truly loved doing - video gaming, reading, writing - in favor of too much other people, other obligations in my life. I'll never get them back, because when I finish school, I'll have to work even harder, put in more hours to advance my career, so I can make enough money to take care of an aging partner.

    All I want is to be thin so I can at least feel confident and be comfortable with myself while doing all of this.
    Oh, I see. You're unhappy. Being thin isn't going to make you happy. You probably can't believe that right now, but it won't. You know what might? Fixing the laundry list of problems you just wrote down.

    You chose to go to grad school even though it sounds like you don't like it. You chose to have your boyfriend move in even it though it sounds like you don't like that either. You chose to pile your plate up and advance your professional career instead of living with less and having more free time. You can also undo these choices if that's what you decide would be best for you. You don't have to do anything. You could go live in a hut with a gaming PC and an Xbox 360 and make your living as a freelance writer if you wanted.

    You choose.
    Today I will: Eat food, not poison. Plan for success, not settle for failure. Live my real life, not a virtual one. Move and grow, not sit and die.

    My Primal Journal

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