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Thread: Did your mother used to hide sweets from you? page

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    Rasputina's Avatar
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    Did your mother used to hide sweets from you?

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    I have a weird relationship with food. Mostly, that chocolate and sweets are a shameful, bad food. As a child, my mom used to hide her own private stash of chocolates and candy from her children. She had her own ice cream, labeled, with her name on it, literally. As a result, she had a gastric by-pass, and I grew up with an extreme aversion to any "sweets". I was actually anorexic as a teen, whilst my siblings and family members grew obese. So, my relationship to "junk food" isn't the usual, as something to be lusted after. Rather, it's something to be disgusted by, a tool for control. Anyone else have a junk-food hoarder mom? I can't enjoy any amount of fast-food, milkshakes, or butter-popcorn, without feeling a tremendous amount of shame and self-loathing.

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    Silky's Avatar
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    My mum did, but not for the same reason. It was because my brother and i would raid the pantry looking for food and eat anything that was in there.

    Guess what? We were hungry after our low fat dinners! I was mostly vegetarian when I was 15 and had some weird disordered eating going on. My brother was just growing and hungry and a turkey / quorn burger, potato waffle and broccoli (no fat) just didn't fill us up.

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    Alex Good's Avatar
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    You see I went in the opposite direction. She tried to hide it but I always found it (with a few bumps and bruises from my climbing feats) and so I viewed junk food as a symbol of my unquenchable power.
    In all of the universe there is only one person with your exact charateristics. Just like there is only one person with everybody else's characteristics. Effectively, your uniqueness makes you pretty average.

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    Alex Good's Avatar
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    Wait, your parents forced vegetarianism on you? Did you grow to normal height?

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    No I chose to be vegetarian. Sigh.

    I grew to be all of 5'3.

    However my mum is 5'1, and my nan is 4'9. My dad is 5'8 so I didn't inherit a lot of height genes!
    I have also been on steroid inhalers since I was 7, and I hit puberty at age 10 all of which stunt growth. The vegetarianism was just the icing on the cake.

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    My parents never could afford sweets, so for me it was a joy to be able to eat them once i could afford them myself. Sigh.

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    Alex Good's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Silky View Post
    No I chose to be vegetarian. Sigh.

    I grew to be all of 5'3.

    However my mum is 5'1, and my nan is 4'9. My dad is 5'8 so I didn't inherit a lot of height genes!
    I have also been on steroid inhalers since I was 7, and I hit puberty at age 10 all of which stunt growth. The vegetarianism was just the icing on the cake.
    Oh. Well, I feel your pain anyway. My growth was stunted by my celiac disease during the year that I was made a charge of the government. They feed you nothing but pasta. Now I'm only 6'3.5" even though I should've hit 6'7".
    In all of the universe there is only one person with your exact charateristics. Just like there is only one person with everybody else's characteristics. Effectively, your uniqueness makes you pretty average.

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    I was scrawny as a kid so my mother, who was a great cook, used to say "eat it's good for you"; even if it was left-over (home-made) cake. I am the only one in my family that isn't overweight and addicted to sweets. With our son my husband and I buy treats that are just for him. Hubby and I are both primal and our 14 yr. old son is only 75% primal. He is free to eat whatever he wants when ever he wants. Funny thing is he never over eats anything. We also only have healthy real foods, when we buy him treats they are always organic and made with real ingredients. It's really important to me to raise our son w/o any food trips, if he has any at all it's that he's an epicurean, he's never even tasted a fast food hamburger or store bought pizza. It's not that he's not allowed, he's just sure it will be yucky.

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    My mom has an insane sweet tooth, for years it was milkshakes from the drive-thru every single day...maybe even multiple times a day (i wasn't always around but i am sure it happened). Last year I introduced her to frozen yogurt and ever since then she stops and gets a large cup piled with toppings every day, no matter what city she is in she will find it. All of this and the 100 calorie snack packs of chocolate cookies and sweets PLUS fruit, etc. BUT my whole life both of my parents have brought up my sisters and I with comments like "You are going to eat ALL of that?" "You really need to stop eating so much or you are going to get fat" "Looks like you have been gaining some weight lately" These may not seem so bad but all three of us were between 100-120 and always severely underweight for our height. I am 5'11" and just the other day I told my mom that I weighed 132lb after my blood work and she says "holy moly, amanda, you better stop eating so much and start losing that weight" WHAT WEIGHT?! That is the most average weight I have EVER been in my entire life. My dad would pinch our thighs while he made his comments. I never realized how "damaging" all of these little comments had been until recently, I catch myself thinking that I have gained weight and need to lose it but what's even worse is that those sweet foods don't scare me, I binge eat them out of self pity.

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    Mom did hide the sugary stuff from Halloween and Easter to parcel it out over the next month. Other than that, we learned early on that sugary stuff was Mom's. Pudding, kid's cereals (we got cheerios, raisin bran, or honey bunches of oats), chocolate, ice cream... all mom's unless she deigned to share. If you ate Mom's food, you got in trouble and got a guilt trip AND the punishment.
    It doesn't seem to have given me a complex or issues with sweet foods. I don't think I really cared, because any sweet craving I got could be taken care of by the Kool aid I rarely drank, chocolate milk, or (with permission) some of Mom's canned pineapples. Sweet stuff was just something meant to be once in a while thing, not tied to emotion, punishment, or reward.
    "No fate but what we make"- Sarah Connor, Terminator 2
    Life is not a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, steak in one hand, chocolate in the other, yelling "Holy F***, What a Ride!"
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