Why are people so concerned with weight-loss? page 28

[RitaRose]

You are right. Being fat is good for you.

No, but being fat doesn't discount everything else a person does in their life and make them worthless.

People are a compilation of many parts.

[Goldie]

Being able to make snap judgements based on physical appearance is an evolutionary survival skill. Our ancestors had to be able to decide in a split second if that *whatever* was dangerous, or not. Fight or flight?

What makes us human is the ability to go beyond that snap judgement to see other characteristics in that *whatever*. We still have the instinctive reaction to make a instant decision based on appearance, but if we think and collect more data, we can change our initial impression. This holds true whether the person we're looking at is overweight, of a different culture or ethnicity, disabled, or is in any other way "different" from us and what we're used to.

It's unfortunate that some people don't learn how to go beyond the snap judgement and think.

This isn't directed at anyone here, just a general "IMHO".

[BestBetter]

My 29 year old husband has psoriatic arthritis in his knees, which results in periodic flares that render him practically incapable of walking (even around the house). How did it get that bad? Because when the arthritis was first beginning, the doctors were totally clueless and never told him it could be arthritis, or that he shouldn't overexert his knees. So, wanting to look especially ripped after putting on some muscle, he dropped carbs and started running, which completely destroyed his knees, likely forever. Now, he must be vigiliant about not walking too much, or his knees swell with synovial fluid and he's confined to the couch for months. All in the name of trying to look 'awesome'.

[Leida]

No, but being fat doesn't discount everything else a person does in their life and make them worthless.

I don't get it. Does anyone actually said that it is so? That it is mutually exclusive to be a good mom, a trained professional or having a calling, a good person, and be fit and trim, and not all of this is important? When body, soul and mind are in balance that's pretty much the best place to be, and they support each-other. I don't think emphasizing any of it over the others leads to a rather happy life overall. Why continually set one against the other? Health vs looking good, motherhood vs carrier, etc? I figure, once you cut all junk, you can have everything that is important. No junk in the mind, no junk in the mouth, no junk in the soul... and here you go, you have the time and energy to attend to everything that matters.

[sbhikes]

I don't see what is so awesome about being so judgmental.

You know what? My grandmother was fat. Really super fat. I loved my grandmother. It felt good when she hugged me. There's something very comforting and safe about an ample, maternal lady holding you in her arms. My neighbor's mother was fat, too. She made her house the warm and welcoming hearth where all us kids would go to play every day. She was a stern and tough, kind and loving mother to us all. What is awesome is when people are loving, caring and warm. You should always remember that for every person out there that you judge negatively, someone somewhere in the world looks at that person with love.

[BestBetter]

just saying that most men I know, when seeing a woman with that body composition in real life, are not sexually attracted to her. And yet our society holds that body composition up as the ideal of feminine beauty. It just doesn't make sense.

I agree with this. A while ago, I was discussing with my husband the comparative attractiveness of a thin, fit woman to a curvy, slightly fattier woman. He said no contest - the curvier one. He said that if he was interested in cuddling with washboard abs, he'd probably pursue a man. One of the things he was attracted to in women was what made them different from men; namely fattier, curvier parts. And he assured me that the majority of hetero men would go for a curvier woman over a skinny one.

I wasn't willing to believe this (In part because I, myself am generally attracted to thinner women), so I did a sort of informal survey of my male friends, and dammit not one of them said they'd go for a skinny woman. In fact, several said they'd even prefer an obese woman with big boobs over a skinny one. This really shocked me, and made me realize that most women are totally off-base in their assumptions of what's sexually appealing to men.

Someone (can't remember who - sorry!) on an older banned thread said that f-ing a skinny girl was like f-ing a plastic bag full of hangers, which my husband confirmed. He actually said, 'there's nothing worse than f-ing a skinny girl', and he didn't just mean skinny-fat, he meant 'lacking enough fat to grab onto'.

Realizing this made me decide to not care too much about those infernal last few stubborn pounds. I had been fixated on them because I really wanted to be able to wear a bikini with pride, but in the end, it's just not worth the self-flaggelation. Now I'm okay with looking good clothed, even if I can't pull off a bikini.

[Leida]

But it doesn't follow that you can only love your grandparent or parent if they are ample? My mom was slender, my grandma was not. Neither gave out hugs. I love/d both.

[jfrendek]

Fat people are the only people in this politically correct world that it is still OK to hate and make fun of. Call it human nature or current culture. Perhaps if we were all wasting away the very thin would be the hated. It may not be evolved thinking but I don't expect it to change any sooner than death and taxes. Life is like a "Mean Girls" movie that doesn't end well.

[Gilleh]

No, but being fat doesn't discount everything else a person does in their life and make them worthless.

People are a compilation of many parts.

No one said otherwise. Fat people are really defensive (even if they had lost the weight, it seems they remain defensive).

Did you read Cori93437's massage? What the fuck was that?
sbhikes, did anyone here write that it's "awesome to be judgemental"? I don't think so.
meepster, you're a total demagogue. The talk wasn't about getting ripped (10%) nor skinny, or whatever. It was about not being fat. Some of us said that it's disturbing for them to see people with no will to improve their physical appearance when their current appearance is leading them towards low quality well-being. Meaning those people could be doctors, musicians or the inventors of the cure for cancer. It does not matter. A sick man is a sick man, and obesity is an epidemic.

[Winterbike]

I don't get it. Does anyone actually said that it is so? That it is mutually exclusive to be a good mom, a trained professional or having a calling, a good person, and be fit and trim, and not all of this is important? When body, soul and mind are in balance that's pretty much the best place to be, and they support each-other. I don't think emphasizing any of it over the others leads to a rather happy life overall.

Pretty much that. It might be just a random association (I don't think so though), but the coolest/most interesting/most complete/most daring/most open minded people I know are all in great shape and take care of themselves. It's usually because they understand it's so important to health and happiness, or simply because their lives are balanced enough that they don't have to think about it and it happens naturally. Either way, they are lean and look good naked.

I'm curious about something though. To people who say being lean is impossible without being obsessive and everyone who is lean just got lucky, what is your social environment like? It just baffles me that so many people think like that. I'm sure I'm biased because I'm surrounded by athletes all the time, but still, don't you know any normal-active-healthy-low-body-fat people? Because there are plenty of them, and they should be the norm (and they were before the obesity epidemic).