Girlfriend is Ruining my Primal page

[randomcow]

Hi All - any suggestions on the below? I'll give it to you as it unfolded.

Thanks

RC

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(TLDR: girlfriend refuses to cook primal for me because 1) she can't; 2) she doesn't believe my stomach fat is diet-related. She sees my suggestion that I cook my own dinners as taking away one important thing she currently brings to the table in our relationship).

RC: "So I'm going to need you to make some changes to the dinners you cook. Specifically no grains, no sugar, etc etc"

GF: "Well that doesn't leave much. Most Japanese dishes contain either sugar (or mirin) or rice."

RC: "Nah, it's cool. Just make a big-ass salad every night with your delicious homemade dressings. Grill up some meat."

GF: "Yes but you are taking away my specialty, the thing that I used to seduce you in the first place, my cooking."

RC: "It's ok, don't worry about it. Let's just try this."

GF: "You eat healthily and work out already and you still have a soft stomach. I'm eating rice and sugar and my body is tight like a taiko drum. Boom boom boom!" (ok, maybe not her exact words but you get the picture).

RC: "Yeah but that's because you're Japanese. Ok I tell you what, it sounds like it might be a bit hard for you so how about I start making my own dinners too. I already cook up a storm and make all my breakfasts and lunches for the week on Sunday evening."

GF: "Well where does that leave me? You are already covering the rent until I find a job, and so now my only contribution will be keeping the house clean. I am a woman and therefore my purpose is to serve you, and you are preventing me from fulfilling this purpose."

RC: "Aw baby don't be like that. We'll work it out. I'm sure."

[Piscator]

Quick, marry her, then she can ruin your whole life rather than just your primal!

[randomcow]

It might be a Japanese thing. I often forget that the West hasn't quite caught up to Japan in some areas.

Or have I got that the wrong way around?

Anyway, one vote for "screw her feelings, cook your own!" - thanks!

RC

[Piscator]

Make that 2 votes.

[magicmerl]

If she's cooking real japanese meals from scratch, that seems like it's 90% of the way there.

As in, it falls within your 80%?

Or, maybe get the 'objectionable' dishes like the rice served separately, so you can reduce your portion of it?

[GuineaPigQueen]

I feel very dedicated to cook my husband meals as well. He works, I don't. It only seems fair to me. I'd feel worthless if I didn't cook or clean.

Does she not know how to cook other meals? You can buy her some Primal/paleo cookbooks and have her try some stuff out. It might even be fun to learn how to cook in other styles, try new flavors, etc.

[JoanieL]

Stop blaming your girlfriend unless she's using a loaded gun to make you eat non-primal.

[cayla29s]

As I can see from your posted location you are in Japan? If so the culture is obviously different so I guess she wants to fulfill your needs. In the west, I would tell you to fuck off. If my husband started demanding things the way you posted it, we will have a problem. Anyway, can you ask her to make something without rice. I mean like salmon and some veggies. Surely you have other things available there other than rice.

She doesn't have to eat the way you do so the only solution is you eat together but she can prepare something for herself and for you. More work but you have to compromise somewhere.

[Sandra in BC]

She can "serve you" by making more meat, fish and veg, and less rice and noodles. Same foods as always, different ratios.

Arent the rice and noodles usually a side dish or underneath the main course? Just eat around them.

[zilog]

There's nothing wrong with eating white rice, especially if you're active, and the small amount of sugar in a splash of mirin is going to make no difference. As you said, your GF isn't fat, it's just you. So what other crap are you snacking on that's preventing you from losing bodyfat?