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  1. #1
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    How do you stay motivated when you are the only one...

    Staying motivated to live the PB when everyone around you lives otherwise?

    My husband is very athletic and health conscious, but holds a different philosophy. My friends are at varying levels of health, and my extended family already considers me a bit whacky (I've been an alternative medicine chick in a traditional medicine family for years now). My friends at the gym all want to be healthy, too, but we all do it differently. They also tend to be a lot younger than me (I'm 47), so they still seem to tolerate the SAD way of living without obvious ramifications.

    Today I am excited and happy and anticipating better things to come. I wish I had someone local to share with, and I know at some level the Internet community just can't replace face to face sharing. I went through this with my son's Autism interventions (I'm into biomedical treatments and not meds), and to have yet another interest isolated from others just doesn't sound fun.

    I suppose I just eat what I want, exercise how I want, and enjoy my friends and family, no? At some point it will be simply how I live and not something I need or want to talk about?

    Insights?

    Age 48
    Start date: 7-5-12
    5'3"
    121lbs
    GOAL: to live to be a healthy and active 100


    "In health there is freedom. Health is the first of all liberties."
    Henri Frederic Amiel

  2. #2
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    Apr 2011
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    I feel you. I'm lucky that my BFF is my confidante and we both follow this way of living. How about finding a meetup group near you on meetup.com or putting one together yourself? You might check with your local health food store and ask about others that eat the way you do -- would they be willing to do something to help you connect? Maybe challenge your SO to do this with you for a month, and see how he feels. I know it's tough when you are a lone light, but you CAN do it. I know it. Hang in there.

  3. #3
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    Quote Originally Posted by ciavyn View Post
    Maybe challenge your SO to do this with you for a month, and see how he feels.
    even after witnessing these years of my improved health, my b/f will not give up his cheerios or white bread. or ghetto cheese and hfcs syrup-laden sausage from the supermarket. just. will. not.

    he eats all the good stuff i make, and is very happy to do so, but there are certain absolutes in his life, lol.
    As I ate the oysters with their strong taste of the sea and their faint metallic taste that the cold white wine washed away, leaving only the sea taste and the succulent texture, and as I drank their cold liquid from each shell and washed it down with the crisp taste of the wine, I lost the empty feeling and began to be happy and to make plans.

    Ernest Hemingway

  4. #4
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    i don't know anybody who eats like i do in r/l. only on the interwebs. my friends thought it was weird enough when i gave up grains -- "impossible!!" they all crowed. yeah well, 3 years later and i still haven't been sick once. previously i would have thought THAT was impossible. my health has improved so dramatically, even with some hormonal issues this last year, that i know without doubt i can never go back to the SAD. and i tolerated a grain-heavy, high-carb, low-fat woe of eating for years. i never had a weight problem til my early 40s when all that crap just finally broke me.

    just do what you think is right for yourself and stay off the soapbox. like a mouthy reformed smoker, nutritional zealots can be a raging bore.
    As I ate the oysters with their strong taste of the sea and their faint metallic taste that the cold white wine washed away, leaving only the sea taste and the succulent texture, and as I drank their cold liquid from each shell and washed it down with the crisp taste of the wine, I lost the empty feeling and began to be happy and to make plans.

    Ernest Hemingway

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Nov 2011
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    Santa Barbara
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    You might be less isolated than you think. I just came back from vacation. I went hiking with some friends. Three out of five of us just happened to be on some version of this diet. One lady was about 10 years older than me (I'm 47, also) and she knew all about paleo and the science and said she didn't eat sugar or flour mostly because other things taste better. She ate grains, but she also had coconut oil and olive oil and other paleo things in her backpack. The other man also wasn't eating any flour or sugar, but he did eat grains. His wife, who wasn't with us, got him started through something called FA, one of those anonymous 12-step things. We had a great time talking about all the health changes we've experienced. Turns out that while my friends were hiking in New Mexico they went into a bakery and the owner said HE was on the diet, too! He was thinking about changing his bakery into a healthier restaurant because of all the amazing health changes he'd experienced. I think this way of eating is spreading like wildfire and that if you look around, you may find others. But for now, you might have to just get your fix with us internet people. That's how I deal with it since I don't know any real life people in my own home town on this diet and my partner is cranky and upset about this diet (even though minus the farty oat bran and margarine, it's basically EXACTLY what his stupid cholesterol diet book wants him to eat. It sucks sometimes to live with a man who'd rather win an argument than actually stop and think for a minute.)
    Female, 5'3", 50, Max squat: 202.5lbs. Max deadlift: 225 x 3.

  6. #6
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    Quote Originally Posted by sbhikes View Post
    That's how I deal with it since I don't know any real life people in my own home town on this diet and my partner is cranky and upset about this diet (even though minus the farty oat bran and margarine, it's basically EXACTLY what his stupid cholesterol diet book wants him to eat. It sucks sometimes to live with a man who'd rather win an argument than actually stop and think for a minute.)
    Hey sbhikes - how is it that you and Paleobird aren't occasionally hiking and eating together?? Aren't both of you from Santa Barbara??

  7. #7
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    Quote Originally Posted by Crabbcakes View Post
    Hey sbhikes - how is it that you and Paleobird aren't occasionally hiking and eating together?? Aren't both of you from Santa Barbara??
    I think she is in San Diego. That's about 4 or 5 hours away.
    Female, 5'3", 50, Max squat: 202.5lbs. Max deadlift: 225 x 3.

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Jan 2011
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    California Native living in land locked Kansas
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    My motivation is I feel good. When I first started and people questioned me, I just said I was trying something new and being a human experiment. Now they don't bug me, but even ask I I want something different. As long as everyone is supportive of each other, I don't think we clash, except in method. For example. My hubby eats plenty of stuff, but always asks if "this" is good for me. We may not covert each other, but we are respectful.
    Julia
    Starting Weight 235 - Dec 1, 2010
    Started Primal Mid January 2011
    Current Weight 183
    Goal 160



    Get Outside Already!

    http://moderndayfitandfood.wordpress.com/
    http://moderndaydesigns.wordpress.com/

  9. #9
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    Thanks, everyone. My husband is definitely respectful of my choices, and won't look down at what I do. For that I am grateful. He eats the meals I make and really does enjoy them. I think, like sbhikes points out, I am probably not isolated at all. There are ways to reach out there and discover groups or individuals to connect with on a level I won't with my current group. We have several health food stores/co-ops and I always have my fitness center ("boot camp")...

    I so appreciate the advice about not jumping on my soapbox (unless asked; I just can't resist sometimes!).

    I'd really love to start a monthly dinner group. I guess that is where my question originally came from as I got all whiney about not having a ready-made group of friends for my project.

    Thanks so much. I enjoy my internet fix with y'all. I feel less cranky about that whole thing.

    Age 48
    Start date: 7-5-12
    5'3"
    121lbs
    GOAL: to live to be a healthy and active 100


    "In health there is freedom. Health is the first of all liberties."
    Henri Frederic Amiel

  10. #10
    Join Date
    May 2012
    Location
    land of the glass pinecones
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    4,841
    Quote Originally Posted by PHaselow View Post
    Thanks, everyone. My husband is definitely respectful of my choices, and won't look down at what I do. For that I am grateful.
    this is huge. when i first gave up grains, it was after months and months of trying to lose weight. after i entered my 40s everything just "broke" and my body went to hell. i found atkins and a bell rang. my b/f was dubious, at best. but weight came off, my health improved and i continued my research. as i have dialed it in further, he thinks i'm on the margin of weird, i guess (!), but remains supportive. like, he thinks the bone broth is hilarious, but i know without a doubt it's one of the best things i have done for my health in many years.

    I'd really love to start a monthly dinner group. I guess that is where my question originally came from as I got all whiney about not having a ready-made group of friends for my project.
    i entertain ALL THE TIME. cook what you like because primal food is effing delicious. i make no pronouncements, i just cook. people have been complaining lately that it's been too long since i've had them over! quid pro quo might not be possible, but, hey, start something!
    As I ate the oysters with their strong taste of the sea and their faint metallic taste that the cold white wine washed away, leaving only the sea taste and the succulent texture, and as I drank their cold liquid from each shell and washed it down with the crisp taste of the wine, I lost the empty feeling and began to be happy and to make plans.

    Ernest Hemingway

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