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    PHaselow's Avatar
    PHaselow is offline Senior Member
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    How do you stay motivated when you are the only one...

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    Staying motivated to live the PB when everyone around you lives otherwise?

    My husband is very athletic and health conscious, but holds a different philosophy. My friends are at varying levels of health, and my extended family already considers me a bit whacky (I've been an alternative medicine chick in a traditional medicine family for years now). My friends at the gym all want to be healthy, too, but we all do it differently. They also tend to be a lot younger than me (I'm 47), so they still seem to tolerate the SAD way of living without obvious ramifications.

    Today I am excited and happy and anticipating better things to come. I wish I had someone local to share with, and I know at some level the Internet community just can't replace face to face sharing. I went through this with my son's Autism interventions (I'm into biomedical treatments and not meds), and to have yet another interest isolated from others just doesn't sound fun.

    I suppose I just eat what I want, exercise how I want, and enjoy my friends and family, no? At some point it will be simply how I live and not something I need or want to talk about?

    Insights?

    Age 48
    Start date: 7-5-12
    5'3"
    121lbs
    GOAL: to live to be a healthy and active 100


    "In health there is freedom. Health is the first of all liberties."
    Henri Frederic Amiel

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    ciavyn's Avatar
    ciavyn is offline Senior Member
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    I feel you. I'm lucky that my BFF is my confidante and we both follow this way of living. How about finding a meetup group near you on meetup.com or putting one together yourself? You might check with your local health food store and ask about others that eat the way you do -- would they be willing to do something to help you connect? Maybe challenge your SO to do this with you for a month, and see how he feels. I know it's tough when you are a lone light, but you CAN do it. I know it. Hang in there.

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    noodletoy's Avatar
    noodletoy is offline Senior Member
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    i don't know anybody who eats like i do in r/l. only on the interwebs. my friends thought it was weird enough when i gave up grains -- "impossible!!" they all crowed. yeah well, 3 years later and i still haven't been sick once. previously i would have thought THAT was impossible. my health has improved so dramatically, even with some hormonal issues this last year, that i know without doubt i can never go back to the SAD. and i tolerated a grain-heavy, high-carb, low-fat woe of eating for years. i never had a weight problem til my early 40s when all that crap just finally broke me.

    just do what you think is right for yourself and stay off the soapbox. like a mouthy reformed smoker, nutritional zealots can be a raging bore.
    As I ate the oysters with their strong taste of the sea and their faint metallic taste that the cold white wine washed away, leaving only the sea taste and the succulent texture, and as I drank their cold liquid from each shell and washed it down with the crisp taste of the wine, I lost the empty feeling and began to be happy and to make plans.

    Ernest Hemingway

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    noodletoy's Avatar
    noodletoy is offline Senior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by ciavyn View Post
    Maybe challenge your SO to do this with you for a month, and see how he feels.
    even after witnessing these years of my improved health, my b/f will not give up his cheerios or white bread. or ghetto cheese and hfcs syrup-laden sausage from the supermarket. just. will. not.

    he eats all the good stuff i make, and is very happy to do so, but there are certain absolutes in his life, lol.
    As I ate the oysters with their strong taste of the sea and their faint metallic taste that the cold white wine washed away, leaving only the sea taste and the succulent texture, and as I drank their cold liquid from each shell and washed it down with the crisp taste of the wine, I lost the empty feeling and began to be happy and to make plans.

    Ernest Hemingway

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    sbhikes's Avatar
    sbhikes is offline Senior Member
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    You might be less isolated than you think. I just came back from vacation. I went hiking with some friends. Three out of five of us just happened to be on some version of this diet. One lady was about 10 years older than me (I'm 47, also) and she knew all about paleo and the science and said she didn't eat sugar or flour mostly because other things taste better. She ate grains, but she also had coconut oil and olive oil and other paleo things in her backpack. The other man also wasn't eating any flour or sugar, but he did eat grains. His wife, who wasn't with us, got him started through something called FA, one of those anonymous 12-step things. We had a great time talking about all the health changes we've experienced. Turns out that while my friends were hiking in New Mexico they went into a bakery and the owner said HE was on the diet, too! He was thinking about changing his bakery into a healthier restaurant because of all the amazing health changes he'd experienced. I think this way of eating is spreading like wildfire and that if you look around, you may find others. But for now, you might have to just get your fix with us internet people. That's how I deal with it since I don't know any real life people in my own home town on this diet and my partner is cranky and upset about this diet (even though minus the farty oat bran and margarine, it's basically EXACTLY what his stupid cholesterol diet book wants him to eat. It sucks sometimes to live with a man who'd rather win an argument than actually stop and think for a minute.)
    Female, 5'3", 49, Starting weight: 163lbs. Current weight: 135 (more or less).
    Starting squat: 45lbs. Current squat: 170 x 3. Current Deadlift: 220 x 3

  6. #6
    jmday's Avatar
    jmday is offline Senior Member
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    My motivation is I feel good. When I first started and people questioned me, I just said I was trying something new and being a human experiment. Now they don't bug me, but even ask I I want something different. As long as everyone is supportive of each other, I don't think we clash, except in method. For example. My hubby eats plenty of stuff, but always asks if "this" is good for me. We may not covert each other, but we are respectful.
    Julia
    Starting Weight 235 - Dec 1, 2010
    Started Primal Mid January 2011
    Current Weight 183
    Goal 160



    Get Outside Already!

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    PHaselow's Avatar
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    Thanks, everyone. My husband is definitely respectful of my choices, and won't look down at what I do. For that I am grateful. He eats the meals I make and really does enjoy them. I think, like sbhikes points out, I am probably not isolated at all. There are ways to reach out there and discover groups or individuals to connect with on a level I won't with my current group. We have several health food stores/co-ops and I always have my fitness center ("boot camp")...

    I so appreciate the advice about not jumping on my soapbox (unless asked; I just can't resist sometimes!).

    I'd really love to start a monthly dinner group. I guess that is where my question originally came from as I got all whiney about not having a ready-made group of friends for my project.

    Thanks so much. I enjoy my internet fix with y'all. I feel less cranky about that whole thing.

    Age 48
    Start date: 7-5-12
    5'3"
    121lbs
    GOAL: to live to be a healthy and active 100


    "In health there is freedom. Health is the first of all liberties."
    Henri Frederic Amiel

  8. #8
    Rasputina's Avatar
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    You can totally do it! Love thyself. Your dietary choices should have just as much merit and importance as those around you

  9. #9
    Nady's Avatar
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    I've always wondered why the term *doctors orders* validated any dietary plan (no matter how unsupported), but *intolerant* wasn't justification enough to reject problem foods. The phrase 'No, thank you' should be explanation enough.

  10. #10
    Ethereal's Avatar
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    Hi there, it can be very isolating when something that is so huge in your life is so different to those around you. My husband is very supportive and we are in a very strange transition at the moment. I was vegetarian for 7 years and my husband for 18 years! I am eating meat every day now and no grains. He started eating lamb about 9 months ago and will have that for dinner a couple of times a week. He is nowhere near at the stage I am. Meal time is difficult! I do not crave what he is eating anymore which is a major relief. I believe that if I can show him how much stronger and healthier I am living/eating this way then hw will gradually come over to Primal with me. I also believe that this will be at least another 12 months away. While he is very supportive I only really have one other friend who is into alternative lifestyle and every time I see her she can't believe how fantastic I am looking and the changes she seeing in me.

    Have you read GAPS for your child?
    "You can either spend your time & money on being sick, or you can spend your time & money on being healthy"

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