My Bro-Science Experiment - Primal/Paleo Style - RARRRRR! page

[InSearchOfAbs]

Okay, so, didn't really want to put this in a super dee duper
high traffic area, so here it is.

I, Julie W*******, am going to try a Bro-Science experiment.

Why? Because experiments are fun and I've never tried this particular
one before because it always sounded absolutely heinous and laughable to
me.

I used to moderate on a bodybuilding site, and the other mods and I
used to just laaaaugh and laaaaaugh and laugh over the poor ass fools
that would implement this way of eating.

But, lots of freaks do it, so I'm going to try it because I'm bored and it's
a challenge.

Never mind eating and drinking everything in sight the last three months and
putting on ten pounds. Bygones!

So, what am I going to do? Yes, you guessed it - I am going to.......... wait......



wait!











WAIT FOR IT!!!!!!!










"Eat Five to Six Small Meals a Day"

And it starts on Monday, July 30th (cuz I like Monday starts....makes me feel virtuous (barf!).

So! If anyone would like to join me in the Bro-Science experiment, PLEASE DO.


I'm starting my "journal" now, just so I have a place to come back to on Monday to hold
my candy ass accountable.


So there.



Julie

p.s. and oh, there WILL be a calorie deficit involved - I'm shooting for 1500 cals and
I don't give a flying fookarooski WHAT the molecular makeup is of each meal or it's
macronutrient ratio. I'll also be going back to lifting heavy 2 or 3 times a week and
beating my children the other four days for cardio. School (theirs, not mine, heavens
no!) starts August 27th and I hope at LEAST to be down 5lbs by then OR lose an inch
or more wherever it decides to come off.

So there, again....

[InSearchOfAbs]

First things first - Holy fuckballs.

I am so damn stuffed it's NOT EVEN FUNNY.

No, seriously - NOT FUNNY.

Even getting the "vomit chills". Yuck.

Anyway, moving on.....

Starting stats for July 30th, 2012

Female
43yo
5'3.5 height
130lbs

Extensive Measurements: (in inches and the biggest circumference I could find).....

Neck - 12
Chest, under pits - 35.5
Over Boobs - 37
Under Boobs - 32.5
Natural Waist (that I could find) 30.75
Over Navel - 33.75
At Hip Bones (abdomen) - 34.25
My Big Fat Ass - 37.5
Under Big Fat Ass - 37
Right Thigh - 23
Left Thigh - 22.75
Right Calf - 13
Left Calf - 13.5
Right Bicep - 11.25
Left Bicep - 11
Right Forearm - 9.25
Left Forearm 9.5

Eats for the day:
M1 - Coffee and coconut milk 65g - 151cals
M2 - 50g chicken breast, 117g banana - 163cals
M3 - 3 eggs, 90g sweet potato, 4g butter - 323 cals
M4 - 100g chicken breast, 220g green grapes - 300 cals
M5 - 100g chicken breast, 150g rice, 230g tomatoes from my garden - 355cals
Total = 1294

Macros -
C - 135g
P - 102g
F - 40


Workout: (supersets) all 3X8

Lying Leg Press
Stiff legged deadlift

Lat pulldowns
Arnold presses

Flat bench press
Step ups

Seated Cable Row
w/nothing

Treadmill - 30 min - 4mph

Total time at the gym - 1hr


Observations - Coming from NEVER eating breakfast in my ENTIRE LIFE, I'm going to have to
really work on the calories in the morning if I'm going to hit 1500 by the end of the day. Trying
to get 300 cals per meal. Sounds easy, but man, I am so stuffed right now it's ridiculous.

But, I guess it's better than craving a bunch of stupid shit and then succumbing to it like I ALWAYS DO,
so maybe this way of eating is the way to get around that.

My husband is in the kitchen now making his famous air popped popcorn with 1500 cubes of butter
and 3 forty gallon drums of salt, which I love and would eat whether I was hungry or not, but OMG, the
smell is making me want to hurl, so I'm going to have to end this here and go outside.

>urp<

THIS full on 1300 calories? Fucking insane.

[honeybuns]

I seriously do not know how you are able to eat 5 to 6 times a day. I am lucky to manage two meals! Eating this way is really satisfying.

Best wishes on this journey.

[InSearchOfAbs]

Thanks!

Yeah, it's rough, but they *are* super small meals, and if "they" are right that
your stomach empties out after 3 hrs of digestion, then I guess it'd be ready for
that next 300 cals.

Who knows, who knows, I am truly skeptic, and..... therefore, THE BROSCIENCE EXPERIMENT! Hoorah!

Thanks for the visit!

Julie

[InSearchOfAbs]

Day Two

M1 - 7:30am- coffee with coconut milk, egg protein powder in water - 251cals
M2 - 10:30am- 70g chicken breast, 64g non-gmo corn tortillas, 100g salsa - 275cals
M3 - 1:30pm- 100g chicken breast. 100g sweet potato, 100g green grapes - 307 cals
M4 - 4:00pm- 65g Eye of round, 170g blueberries - 202 cals
M5 - 7:00pm- 650g watermelon, 220g strawberries - 265cals

1301 Total Calories

Macros:
P - 100g
C - 173g
F - 27g

Exercise - Jack Shit.

I blame it on my Ten Year Old INFANT who has NEVER, NOT ONCE, slept through the G-D night.

So I barely slept at all. Dragging ass all day and a total righteous bitch to boot.

Good thing he's cute, or I'd sell 'im.

[InSearchOfAbs]

Day Three

M1 - 8:30am- coffee and coconut milk - 169cals
M2 - 9:30am- Lara Bar - 230 cals
M3 - 12:00pm- 100g chicken breast, 75g rice, 75g sweet potato - 298cals
M4 - 2:00pm- 3 eggs, 111g pear - 278cals
M5 - 5:45pm- 150g chicken breast, 80g rice, 80g sweet potato, 800g watermelon - 622 cals

Total Cals - 1600

Macros:
C - 186g
P - 110g
F - 50g


Exercise - supersets, all 3X8
lying leg press
static lunges

lat pulldown
arnold presses

flat bench press
step ups

sldl
bor

Treadmill - 30min - 3.7mph


Observations -

Finally fit in those 400 extra calories from the two previous days
of not getting up to 1500 cals.

Yeah, I trained today, and yeah I did supersets, and yes I sweat
like a freaking pig, but it was the hour of SWIMMING, playing "sea monster"
with my kids in the POOL that made me ravenous come 5:45pm. Holy SHIT.

I was like, "oh mi gawd, I have got to eat and I've got to eat NOW!"

Totally stupid.

It's so funny how swimming (even just fucking around) makes you so dang hungry,
yet they say swimming is the shittiest for "fat burning".

Whatever. 'Twas hongry, so I ate a crapload.

Bygones.

[InSearchOfAbs]

Day Four

M1 - 8:30am - coffee with coconut milk - 150cals
M2 - 9:30am - 262g bananas - 233cals
M3 - 12:30pm - 150g chicken breast, 100g rice - 333 cals
M4 - 3:30pm - 300g tomatoes, 15g mayonnaise - 143 cals
M5 - 6:45pm - 200g eye of round, 500g watermelon, 550g strawberries - 635cals

Total Calories - 1496

Macros:
P: 107g
C: 191g
F: 40g

Exercise - swept and mopped floors for two hours, 2 loads of laundry, 2 hours of pollywogging
with eldest at the ponds.

Feeling overly full even now at 9:45pm.

Must even out the calories better so I don't feel like this at bed time. Blah.

[patski]

Damn Julie! You so tiny. *giggles*

Crazy question: why iz you doin' low fat?

[InSearchOfAbs]

Hey there hot stuff!

Tiny my ass..... There's a reason Mama can only fit into ONE pair of pants
these days... ack.

Anyway, totally not even TRYING to do low fat.

Not afraid of fat, love fat, it just comes out at the end of the day as low
fat.

I need to get back into vegetable land, then you'll start seeing more fat... everything
I've been eating just doesn't need it. Especially the fruit, HAR! Mmm, butter on watermelon,
delicious >YAK<.

In other news, my experiment was partially derailed, starting Friday. Did well until we went
to the fair with the kids. Didn't eat my weight in Carni Crap, but I ate *some*. So calories
were kept to about 1500, but me thinks a corn dog and a few bites of cotton candy ain't
primal. Sue me.

Saturday and today were all shot to hell in a handbag because my sister and I left for my
mom's house yesterday morning for her 70th birthday.

So not only could I not say "yo bitches, I gotta eat every 2.5/3hrs" but I couldn't put any
restraints on WHAT I ate either because they're already "this close" to committing me for
putting them through 43 years of "eating this way and that way". So I just kept my trap
shut and ate whatever and whenever they wanted.

Which, resulted in a shit ton of food, but not too much... prolly 'round 1600 per day.

So for the week, total calories were 10,391 divided by 7 = 1484, which is still a tad under
the 1500kcal a day I wanted.

But we'll see tomorrow when I weigh in.

I feel like a big fat bloated cow.

Not anywhere NEAR the super cute JERSEY COWS that were at the fair. OMG those are the
cutest cows on the planet. There were six of them and three were baaaaaabies. So cute.

Anyway, back on with the plan tomorrow.

On the upside, I quit drinking, cold turkey, 14 days ago (but who's counting...), so
even if I didn't lose one measly pound, at least my LIVER is jumping up and down cheering with
pom poms.

So there's that.

[InSearchOfAbs]

DARNITSAUCE!

Welp, my broscience experiment is going to have to come to an end, for now.

The company my husband works for was bought (okay, sold to) Oracle, so basically
just the thought of us going through another stint of joblessness (if it comes to that,
who knows if Oracle will keep all the employees, I'm thinking NOT) makes me want to
vomit, but since learning this ever so lovely information, I haven't been hungry at
all.

So I'm going to roll with that and just go back to eating when I'm hungry.

No sense in eating if I'm just going to barf it up.

Waste of money, right? Right.

Oh well, carry on people!