So...I think September 8 was the last time I had a significant amount of caffeine with a few exceptions. Sept 21, after getting up at 5:30, working all day, then picking up the kids, and getting on the road for a two hour drive to meet my soon to be ex to hand off the kids, I stopped and got a breve one pump mocha that had a shot of espresso to get me through the 4 hour round trip. This morning, I had a tall Pike's Place with 2 inches of cream. But otherwise, my caffeine intake has been around 8-10 mg a day from either cocoa or chocolate or decaf coffee. I chose real coffee this morning b/c my daughter woke me three times between 12 am and 3 am and my son woke once.
In other shocking news, I have not had raw milk since Friday night. Today is day 4 with no milk. Nor have I had chocolate. At this time, I have decided that to eliminate all dairy isnt what I am going for. I plan to eliminate milk, and vastly reduce dairy and caffiene for now. I accept that some mornings I am going to have a tall coffee with cream.
I ordered some Brewing cocoa (like Crio Bru) and hope it arrives soon. If I like it, I'll have some of that with raw cream every morning instead of coffee, saving coffee for times when I need caffiene.
I am beginning to think, though, that as long as I can not get a full night's sleep, I am just not going to be in optimal health. I have always been the sort who needed 10 hours instead of 8 to feel my best, and now I get 4 hours and then 2 or 3 hours after waking for 20 min...it isnt promoting health for me. I try to remind myself of how much worse I'd feel if I wasnt eating primal, and limiting caffiene and dairy, etc...but it is frustrating to me that my best will only earn me medium results b/c of somthing that is out of my control.
I started limiting my daughter's fluids near bedtime. Nothing to drink after 7 pm b/c she was wetting the bed every other night as a reaction to her dad's absence. I really hoped this would result in not waking at night at all...but she still wakes at 12-2 am every night...but at least she stopped wetting the bed.
Otherwise, eating primal, taking adrenal supplements, and going to bed before 10 pm every night. The next time I see my OB/GYN (because I dont have a primary care doctor) I'll get my adrenals tested. If that test comes back normal, I dont know what is wrong with me. Other than lack of sleep. Still happy that I havent needed pharmacological assistance to sleep in 2 months.
I imagine my divorce will be final the last week of October or the first week in November, which makes me a little sad, but ready to move on. If I didnt believe this was the healthiest choice, I couldnt do it. It's really hard. And it makes me angry still, and may always sometimes, that he chose his addictions over his family.
Last edited by Periwinkle; 09-25-2012 at 08:21 PM.
It's just another day in paradise
As you stumble to your bed
You'd give anything to silence
Those voices ringing in your head
You thought you could find happiness
Just over that green hill
You thought you would be satisfied
But you never will-
Learn to be still