Just kidding. Really it would involve nothing more than talking to someone who was actually qualified to judge whether everything was ok with you or if you were in fact at risk. A bunch of amateurs on the Internet can't judge that. Based on what you have said, I think it would be a good idea to go there and have an evaluation done. I've known someone who did that, gone to the emergency department and asked for help, and they were seen right away and it was very helpful.
Also, this kind of think happens all the time to teenage girls under a lot of stress due to exams. Being female, 17 and revising like mad and dieting is one of the highest risk combination possible. You will grow out of it in a year or two, but right now you need medical attention, because right now is where all the risks are.
Haha whenever anyone goes to the school counsellor somehow everyone in the school finds out. And I already lie to my friends enough; they don't know anything about paleo or fasting or how much I eat.
Maybe I'll just wait until I talk to the counsellor on the 11th and I can ask them what I should do.
You say that you're afraid of therapy. You may not know it, but this this thread is therapy. The kind of posting that you're doing here is pretty much what goes on during any therapy session. (See, it's not so bad...) The patient (you) does almost all of the talking, and that's how it's supposed to be. I'm so glad you posted that little bit of history about the ballet leotard. This is very healthy and very normal talk.
Keep talking. I want this thread to be pages and pages and pages long!!
It sounds like it will be a while before you can eat a full day of calories/food. So make those calories count! Steak and eggs in a little butter, a few veggies, and a little greek yogurt.
By the way, did you look at this Friday's Success Story from two days ago? The Success Stories are one of the best things about this website. These folks are eating mondo calories and still staying thin.
5'0" female, 42 years old.
Started Primal October 31, 2011, at a skinny fat 111.5 lbs.
Current weight: 101.5. lbs and holding steady. Spring yardwork here we come!
Co-worker 1: Needs to lose ~50. Now he wants to start Mayo Clinic Diet. Yeesh. Give it up, man.
Co-worker 2: Needed to lose ~55. Lost 20 from stress. Started Primal in Sept, lost 20 more, but gained 10 back on a carb spree. We're working on it.
Australia has a largely national health care system. Most things are free at point of access, i.e. you don't have to pay anything. Go wherever is easiest for you to manage. An A&E department, your GP, or maybe you can google for a health care centre in town, or contact a clinic dealing with eating disorders. Do the googling on a library computer if you have to. Say you're going out shopping, or want to study quietly in the library. Whatever let's you get help while feeling safe doing it. There are services out there and they do want to help.
Be totally honest with whoever you go to. Tell them how little you eat. Show them a food log if need be. Let them know how you think.
Ribbons, what I'd really want to do is hug you and be there to help you, but I am on the other side of the world, so all I can do is assure you that there is help, and there is a way.