Primal for Life - my journal page 14

[lucy1984]

joey cute.jpg

[lucy1984]

Ok well I don't have much to report, as things seem to be going along fine, holding steady at 67kg, just waiting to get to 66kg now! But I thought I'd post a pic of the most gorgeous puppy in the world!Cause that's definitely worth sharing, IMO. On whom I have been wasting a LOT of time

[GoJenGo]

For some reason, I'm not seeing your posts when I check the board! I've checked in twice and have seen nothing?! Weird....

I enjoy the updates, nothing boring about it! It's nice to see that slow and steady is still winning the race! Keep up the good work. Sometimes that's harder to do than it feels like it should be - for me, anyway.

That is the cutest pup EVER! Lucky you!
I am hoping to get one within the next year, hopefully a rescue.

How's life today? I bet your hub is pretty happy to see you enjoying some success after such a long upstream struggle against your uncooperative metabolism.

[lucy1984]

Hm, that is odd. Nevermind!

I have decided to not weigh myself for a month. It was good before, hwen I was losing, but when I get stuck on a plateau it f*cks with my mind. So I have decided to do 'Febfast' - but instead of no alcohol, I am going to not weigh. And I can't be trusted, so I put them up in the cupboard, and they aren't coming out til March 1!

OMG I am so in love with that dog!!! I'd love one of my own, but the place where we live doesn't allow pets, so in the meantime I must make do with visiting my parents'.

And yeah, I mean, he has never been anything but supportive - like most men he doesn't think I need to lose weight and would love me anyway, but he can see how frustrated I get.

[GoJenGo]

Ok, I just typed up a LONG post and lost it. I am ready to throw this laptop out the flipping window! Going to try my best to remember what I'd said.

I can definitely understand why you are loving that precious pup!!! I think more pics are in order.

I had a good feeling that your husband is totally supportive despite feeling that you don't need to lose weight and are gorgeous just as you are. Isnt it something that we can't enjoy that? (I did the same thing while married, believe me)

I am loving the idea of a "Febfast"! I have been thinking about a lot of things lately and it dawned on me that maybe we really need to redefine success now that we are beginning to feel like our metabolisms are behaving more like those of "normal" people. I think that any and every loss we have is a success, but even moreso is the ability to maintain it. Maintenance of each loss is vital and what will ultimately help us reach our goals in the long term. It seems to be the norm for people who have had thyroid issues that have been improved with meds that slowwwwwwwwwwwwww losses are to be expected and are the only losses which are sustainable long term. I know that for me, my impatience often ended up resulting in my changing things up when they were working - just not quickly enough for my liking. I took the fact that the weight wasn't flying off of me to mean that my efforts were NOT working. What a dork! Had I stayed the course and been patient with slow, sustainable loss, I probably wouldn't still be fighting this silly battle with a few vanity pounds. I'm also wondering if that's a big part of what contributed to my thyroid issues in the first place - chronic dieting. If you think about it, our bodies are doing exactly what they are supposed to do in order to protect themselves from us - downregulating our metabolism and hanging on to fat in order to ensure our survival!

I've been reading the board a lot, taking note of post after post and thread after thread in which this very idea seems to be at the heart of the problem. It's overwhelming. I've been working on tweaking my way of thinking more than anything lately. I know that until that happens, I'll just continue to find new things I want to work on improving. I'm tired of this merry-go-round!

I haven't weighed for a couple of weeks and may just join you when you let your scale out of the cupboard. Are you planning to do it on the first of March?

[lucy1984]

I hate losing posts! Usually it's because I stupidly close the screen without pressing send though, so user error

Hm, I agree to a certain extent, chronic dieting certainly hasn't helped me, but my thyroid condition is Hasimoto's, so I think it would have happened anyway - many women in my family have it, and they weren't all chronic dieters and exercisers like myself. I probably got it earlier, and made it worse though! My mum's was post-partum. And yes, one of the reasons I decided not to weigh was that I was tempted to change what I've been doing as I wasn't losing the weight as fast as I'd like. By not weighing, I won't really have an idea how much I've lost, and will give the current regime a chance to work before changing something.

Honestly, if I could see myself through my husbands eyes, I'd probably stop dieting and be happy with my body right now! Nor do I judge anybody else's body with the same critical eye as my own. Ah well. That attitude was OK pre-thyroid issues, but now that I have them, unfortunately it is the case that if I just stop trying, I'll gain faster than anyone. Maybe not once I get properly medicated, but that would never have happened unless I had cared enough to hunt down a solution....

[lucy1984]

joey_2.jpg

What they hey, another cute photo!

[lucy1984]

Hm, well who knows if this will work, but a few days off weighing myself and I am definitely feeling more positive! I haven't lost any weight, that I can tell, but I am definitely not feeling as negative when I look int he mirror. Interesting. I think, if I get through a month of no weighing, and I don't gain any weight, then I will definitely consider say...weekly weighing, rather than daily (or more!)

[GoJenGo]

That pup is just to die for. I just read back to refresh my memory as to whether it is a boy pup or a girl pup and I saw a couple of posts that I never did see, like the one about poaching an egg! My laptop and phone are playing mind games with me - good old technology! Or maybe my mind is playing mind games with me. Either way, I'm trying to slowly catch up.

I was actually thinking the same thing about weighing frequency after reading your last post. I always weighed daily in the am - until a few months ago, when I realized that whether I was happy or disappointed with the results, that such a routine was directing me into that unhealthy mind set right off the bat and setting the tone for the rest of the day. I'm trying to buck all of the crappy habits that suck time and positive energy out of me and affect my attitude and mood, and it's been a great thing. That's not the gauge I want to be using anymore, anyway.

After weighing on 3/1, I may start doing it every other week, but I'm not sure. Even though I think that weekly is perfectly reasonable, it feels so good to have gotten away from that habit (or more accurately, that MINDGAME) and I think that every other week gives a pretty accurate idea of the overall trend. Even though it's valuable info and important feedback , the number on the scale isn't even my main focus, to be honest. I want my clothes to fit better again and to see my body comp return to what it was pre-thyroid bonk. Maybe I'll do a bi-weekly jeans check instead?!

I'm not changing what I'm doing on any other fronts - still eating well, exercising and doing anything and everything that might help my body feel better. Just working on getting rid of the negative mental cycle in which I found myself accidentally wrapped!
Wow, I really need to quit babbling....

What's the pup's name, and is it a boy or girl?

[lucy1984]

Isn't he just adorable?? His name is Joey. He's so clever too! Mum already has him coming when you call his name. We have never had a well trained dog before.

Ha, ah yes the eggs. I ended up using the poaching cups in the microwave. I don't know if a chef would call
them poached, but it cooks the white and the yolks are running, so can't complain! Much faster than the stove top too.

Yeah totally, I was sick of waking up happy, then being depressed the rest of the day because of the scale!
And hopefully not thinking about it every day will make the slow journey seem faster - a watched pot never boils, a watched scale never decreases! And I'm definitely feeling more positive about my body. And more realistic in general - I bought a magazine the other day, and the model they had modeling the exercise clothes was SO skinny, she looked unhealthy and like a light breeze would knock her over, and I thought, a) I don't want to look like that, I want an athletic, healthy body, and b) why wouldn't they get someone fit and sporty to model exercise clothing?? Once upon a time I probably just would have looked at it and hated myself.

I haven't changed what I'm doing either, but the last week or so my temps during the day have been really low -they had been 36.8-36.9, now I am at like, 36.4-36.5. Not sure what to do - perhaps my body has adjusted to the dose and I need to increase my morning one slightly...

And feel free to babble, it is a great time waster when I am waiting for my statistical modelling to compute!


Edit: My temps were better today, I cut the morning cortisol back to 1 tab. Looks like more may not necessarily be better