Primal Journal (Judg) page 92

[jenn26point2]

Glad to see you're doing well, Judg. Just got caught up on you and there is a LOT of stuff to comment on. I'll stick with seconding Tomi's comments that you're doing great with the hands you've been dealt and I too wish I had your patience.

[Judg]

Tomi, DH should hopefully be home by early next week. The sooner the better. He's getting run ragged.

As far as patience is concerned, I haven't got a lot of choice. It's either that or fail. I reached a tipping point a few years ago and I tipped. There is no way I want to go back. And honestly, at this point I almost feel like crying when I look in the mirror. I feel like I'm looking at a miracle. A quarter of a century is a long time to be obese.

As far as fitness goes, it's much the same thing. I have the choice between slow progress and no progress. There are no other options.

I spent a couple of years almost flat on my back from exhaustion. I decided to consider myself on a prolonged retreat, and used that time to dig deep with God. I wrestled through a lot of issues (not that they're all dealt with) and some of that has been applied to my health problems. We want to be able to flip a switch, pop a pill, click send, and deal with our problems instantaneously. But only very small things can be settled like that. Most everything else in life requires one brick after another, till the wall is built.

Having said that, I am not doing well with the no fruit policy, probably because it came on me too fast and I haven't had the time to persuade myself it is really necessary. I came back from running errands very tired (hope I don't pay for that) and downed two bowls of frozen blueberries and cream for dessert. Feeling a little rebellious, I think. My decisions don't tend to stick very well if they haven't been well ripened.

[Coll]

Judg, sorry you're dealing with candida! I have a friend who had a similar deal going on and she cut out all sugar and fruit for a while and saw a huge improvement in her overall health as well as the candida issue. It is astounding how many people have their bodies riddled with candida - although maybe not seeing how most people eat. But I am sure that once you are ready to really attack it you will do just fine. Give your decision time to ripen ... and know that there will be an end to it all. There are a number of products available that can support your attempt to kick the candida. There are some good products at health food stores if you ask a sales person which they recommend and why. I have found some really good stuff that way.

I agree that we have such a strong desire to find the quick fix for everything and there are so few things that work out that way. But as a western society certainly, there is a tendency to try something (a lot of times very half heartedly) and then say it doesn't work. So much of our health is dependent on our choices and taking responsibility for ourselves and not expecting the health care professionals to provide the miracle cure. Anyway, my little soap box there.... I hope you are able to figure out some good strategies for kicking the candida out. Let us know how it goes!

[Judg]

Coll, yes, I will be mulling this over. I'm going to watch for symptoms. Maybe the lifestyle I am already living will enable me to beat it without doing something drastic. So of course, I had a berry smoothie for breakfast. It was next up in the rotation and I decided to go for it.

I did my resistance band workout again today, even if I am feeling quite tired and uninspired. Seeing as it seems to get me going when I should be sleeping, maybe morning will be a good thing. We will see. If I feel drained the rest of the day, especially in my muscles, I will have to rethink this. Had a bit of stiffness in my legs this morning, which rather surprised me. Walking doesn't normally do that to me. It didn't last long though.

College Son is coming home today, and the Professor will follow in a day or two, depending on how much last-minute stuff they've piled on him. He is so worn out, I'm getting concerned. I don't want him to follow me.

[tomi]

Everything has a time and a season......... purhaps your time of utter exhaustion was for the explicit purpose of you digging in deep and drawing closer to God? Or, purhaps it was just a result of living in a fallen world, with feable and frail bodies, and you were simply in the right place spiritually to draw close, to seek His wisdom in the issues that held your heart captive, and to rest in His comfort and peace? God always meets us right where we are...........

Whatever the reason and whatever the path for your patience and tenacity............ you are an encouragement to us all.

I pray the Professor will get some much needed rest and recovery while home with his family. And maybe the New Year will bring new opportunities - maybe even bring him back home for good!

[Siobhan]

It will be nice to have your family around at Christmas!

I've tried to cut back on fruit as I can easily get out of control with it. I have to ration myself! But I don't ration berries, especially blackberries and raspberries. They are relatively low in carbs and they seem to agree with me. But we are different. Candida is big problem, we see it in the hospital all the time. When a person gets sick and/or their immune system in compromised, it rears its ugly head.

[Judg]

Well, if I've got Candida, I've had it a long time. A little longer won't change much. And I do think it's not as bad as before, it just really threw me for a loop to even consider it. How do they treat it in the hospital, Siobhan?

Tomi, I don't think God caused the exhaustion, but he is very pragmatic. He will take any situation and turn it to his and our advantage, or at least extract all the good that can be gotten from it. That's my view, anyway.

I think the stiffness in my legs (mainly in the back of my knees) is caused more by the workouts than the walking. I'm still pretty tired today, but able to get things done if I'm relaxed about them. Christmas tree is up now, with some help from College Son, who got home yesterday. Big Christmas cactus in bloom in the living room too, as well as last year's poinsettia, which is now much bigger, but the blooms are smaller than on the commercially grown ones. So lots of colour in the living room now. I put the Christmas tree on a timer, so I don't have to worry about crawling under the tree and knocking ornaments off twice a day.

No exercise today, just feeling a little too washed out. I might do a little dancing later, but don't count on it.

[Judg]

"When I was a boy and I would see scary things in the news, my mother would say to me, 'Look for the helpers. You will always find people who are helping.' To this day, especially in times of disaster, I remember my mother's words, and I am always comforted by realizing that there are still so many helpers -- so many caring people in this world."
- attributed to Mr. Rogers

[Coll]

Yes, the helpers are very encouraging to see and to know that there are so many out there. I hope you are doing ok - sounds like busy time for you too since your house is filling up. Have fun with your kids and hope it can be a lovely time of reconnecting and refreshing for you all even in the busyness.

[Candy in Wonderland]

Probiotics can help with Candida overgrowth (what's in a name, Candida is my full firstname ). You could consider supplementing with Saccharomyces boulardii (a beneficial yeast), lactobacillus acidophilus, lactobacillus rhamnosus and bifidobacter longum. Or you can find these probiotics in fermented foods such as yogurt, kefir, miso, kimchi and sauerkraut (non pasteurized).