Primal Journal (Judg) page 81

[jenn26point2]

Hi Judg. I hope you're feeling better.

Your lunch the other day looked absolutely delicious!

I wish I could try your fudge!

Glad you had such a good day with the kiddos. Sorry it wore you out so much.

And CONGRATS on 144!! What a great number.

They have smoke detectors now that supposedly know the difference between actual smoke and "cooking". The Home Depot was advertising them on the radio. I think they were Kidde brand. I think mine know the difference. We've lived in our house for 5 years and I have burned a LOT of water (usually when potatoes or pasta boil over) and it makes a hell of a stink/smoky mess. My detectors have never gone off for it (but I do know they work - they're electric with battery backup and they get tested).

Have a nice day and a good weekend if I don't talk to you again sooner.

[Coll]

Judg, so glad you got some family time - even if it wore you out. Those precious moments are so worth it! Way to go on the new number - you are inspiring the way you just keep going. Relentless - that is Judg! I can take a page out of your book - just keep on keeping on and you'll get there eventually! Slow and steady wins the race - tortoise and the hare. I am definitely of the tortoise persuasion, have always envied the hares - but I will get to my goal eventually!

[Judg]

I am not capable of being a hare, so tortoise it will be. And yes, I do feel like I'm winning the race.

I feel like I'm at another watershed weight; my mental image of myself is shifting again. I feel a little destabilized because of it, but pleased at the same time. Perhaps it is because my mediums are starting to get loose and I am headed for smalls across the board. Not there yet, but right on the line between the two. I have a hard time wrapping my head around that. I look in mirrors far too much, more from surprise than vanity, I think. I have to reprogram my head to fit the new reality and it's going to take a while. It's a weird feeling, like I'm not sure how to take it. Which one is the real me? My old mental image, or that other person in the mirror? One of them will have to succumb to the other eventually and I really hope the gal in the mirror wins.

I was at 144 again this morning, and this time it wasn't a quick stab down from being emptier than normal. I can feel the difference. (I can feel every pound at this point, which is also very strange.) This means I am in a good staging ground for attacking new lows.

Made a tuna chowder for supper this evening, which was very nice on a cold day. I also had lots of root vegetables to use up, so this made a bit of a dent in the pile. Also made for a carbier (yes, spell-check, I know that is not a real word) meal than I normally have, but I figured a little seasonal eating was a good thing. And I had just come back from an afternoon of errands and walked back 2.5 km in the twilight, so I figured it couldn't do too much damage. I sauteed some onion with bacon, then cooked the veggies and tuna (and a fresh tomato) in chicken broth and added a splash of cream in my bowl - so nice! And parsley and thyme and black pepper too. Full contented tummy now. I might not see any 143 tomorrow morning... LOL!

I'm back to my late-breakfast, two-meal routine. I'm comfortable with that, and it seems to work well for me most of the time. Although it was good to shake things up a bit with my trip to Montreal and the subsequent leptin sort-of reset. Got me out of my rut.

[Judg]

I have got to get in shape. Hubby was astonished that I still have ten pounds to go. He says he can't remember being able to feel my bones 30 years ago like he can now. This, despite the still noticeable layer of flab (yeah, the yucky jiggly stuff) I have on me. I figure it must be because I just don't have the muscle tone I did back then. I think my emphasis is going to shift to concentrate a little more on fitness and a little less on weight loss.

But my challenges remain. I tried Mark's basic movements, and the plank just about killed me, even in its simplest version. My shoulders are still too fragile. I think the resistance bands are still the best choice for my basic LHO work-out, at least for now.

I'm contemplating how best to incorporate sprinting. Perhaps some heavy-duty running on the spot while dancing, as I've done once or twice before, or perhaps some swimming, or a bit of both. I'd be a little self-conscious doing something like that outside, and winter is almost here. Which means snow in the way around here.

I certainly hope I'll have real progress to report by spring. I might have to take some skimpily dressed pictures for my own personal reference. No, I'm not going to share them. You don't want me to, trust me on that one.

[tomi]

Let me say it again - you are an inspiration! Its very difficult to stay the course for as long as you have - and to see the prize so close at hand! I applaud you!

I had a HORRIBLE weekend food-wise!!! Info in my journal. Today its back on track!!!

[Jamilyn121]

I love that he says he can't remember ever feeling your bones like now

I will be so happy the day hubby tells me that. Heck, right now I"m looking forward to the day when I can just see my cheek bones, or jaw line, knuckles.. Lol

[Siobhan]

I know my body is very different than I thought it would be after losing weight. Probably because of aging, but because of my diet as well. My lower body is much smaller than I ever thought it would be at this weight. It has occurred to me that my weight loss is almost totally diet - I have been doing some forms of exercise, but nothing that would burn enormous amounts of calories - and that makes me really happy. As in, "OMG how am I going to maintain this one hour per day of chronic cardio forever?" Primal is great.

[Judg]

Siobhan, it seems to me you have been doing pretty well in the exercise department. I am sure it has contributed to improving your muscle tone and fitness. Exercise as a calorie-burning activity is not the most efficient, but it does make us healthier, and ramp up our metabolism so we burn more calories when not exercising. But I very much get your point. We don't have to be chained to a treadmill routine for life.

Let me say it again - you are an inspiration! Its very difficult to stay the course for as long as you have - and to see the prize so close at hand! I applaud you!

I had a HORRIBLE weekend food-wise!!! Info in my journal. Today its back on track!!!

You are too kind, Tomi. But I was so fed up and frankly, so scared, that there was no way I was turning back once I got on a roll. Almost at my weight goal now, so I honestly won't mind if it goes slower from here on in, but I'm not at my fitness and health goals yet, although they've both improved. They will be harder to measure, mind you. My report the other day, that I went out, did some grocery shopping, hauled my little grocery cart back 2.5 km and THEN MADE A SUPPER FROM SCRATCH is a pretty good measure. Six months ago that would have been almost unthinkable.

I love that he says he can't remember ever feeling your bones like now

I will be so happy the day hubby tells me that. Heck, right now I"m looking forward to the day when I can just see my cheek bones, or jaw line, knuckles.. Lol

I'm afraid he doesn't mean it as a good thing. I think he's getting a little worried, like I'm getting scrawny. He agreed that my wedding weight was a good goal, because he knew it was a good weight for me. So I better tone up, so as not to scare my husband, if for no better reason.

But I really get what you're saying. I first noticed my shoulder bone again (with my hand, it was far from visible) just when I dropped under 200, and it was a glorious feeling. I have bones! Who woulda thunk it?

Went out running some minor errands again, so I walked at least an hour in total, with a rest stop at the coffee shop (just black coffee) before heading home. I'm tired, but not wiped, and there was leftover chowder in the fridge... Yogurt and berries for a late breakfast, with chocolate and Judg Fudg along the way. Not at all hungry here.

[tomi]

Judg - you may have mentioned this somewhere along the way - but I don't remember so will ask............ you seem to walk everywhere - or take public transportation - do you not own a car? I wonder if a bicycle would be a good investment (obviously not a winter form of transport though).

Things are so far away here it would be very difficult for me to walk to do all my errands. The bank is one direction and is a 3 mile round trip. The store is in the opposite direction and is a 2 mile round trip. My job is 3.5 miles away from my house and is uphill for a good portion of it. And - our public transportation system is pretty lame! What takes me 10 minutes to drive would take me a good hour on the bus.

[Judg]

Hubby has a car so I have one when he's home. But I picked this house with an eye to public transport. Ottawa has a pretty good system, and I am half a block away from stops in all directions. I also have shopping of some kind or another in all four directions, within walking distance, if you consider 45 minutes walking distance. My church is 25 minutes away, less for longer legs. The kids' high school, when they were still going, was a fairly easy bus ride away too. I got permission to continue sending them to the same school after we moved.

I like it this way; I am more motivated to walk with a purpose than just go for a walk. This way I kill two birds with one stone. They did a study some time back and discovered that people in urban areas were actually in better shape, because they walked more often. And I think I walk more than most city dwellers. I save great wads of money this way too. Cars are called the black hole of personal finance; they actually cost an incredible amount.

I do have a bike, but I rarely use it. Just not in the habit, I guess.

For really heavy stuff I just wait until hubby comes home.

My bank and grocery stores are probably a bit further than yours, but I usually walk in only one direction when I go there. Of course, we have a different banking system, and I can go to any branch at all of my bank, so I actually have three of them close by. Within range, I also have an IKEA, Lee Valley Tools, shoe stores, a huge book store, clothing stores, coffee shops (in all four directions), grocery stores (in three of them), post offices, a major hospital, drug stores, various churches, restaurants, a police station, bakery, dry cleaner's, medical clinics, convenience stores... I'm sure I've forgotten a few things. Some of these are about three minutes away. A very nice location indeed. The houses around here usually sell so fast they don't have time to get advertised in the newspapers. We're also very close to the freeway through town by car, so it's great for commuters too. Anyway, there isn't much you need in life that I can't find within walking distance, at least not if you don't mind long walks. Today I went to the police station to check into something I need for an application, to my church right next door to bug one of the pastors about something he hadn't got back to me on, to the florist to pick up flowers to commemorate my father, and to the coffee shop to rest. It was unseasonably warm and sunny, so it was a great day to do all that. I am happy.