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Life is not a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, steak in one hand, chocolate in the other, yelling "Holy F***, What a Ride!"
My Latest Journal
5'2", 55 years, Primal since April. Pre-Primal weight loss, from 216.6 to 157.8
Primal low: 140.2 (Dec. 3) Goal weight: 135?
Main Primal goal: beating back my CFS enough to function more normally and start writing again
More and more, our life has been governed by specialists, who know too little of what lies outside their province to be able to know enough about what takes place within it.
- Lewis Mumford
Well, I ate some bacon, which is kind of like Nature's Prozac. I feel better now. Any meal that requires fighting off the carnivores is a pretty good primal meal. And they cheered me up with their antics.
I'm happier now that it is nighttime. I just like night.
Starting wt: 198, Goal: 135, Current with PB: 165
Started at a size 16 down to loose 10
With PB my asthma has improved, low back pain is gone, & I've got more energy
My Primal Journal: http://www.marksdailyapple.com/forum/thread60175.html
I use the fitbit ultra and it is awesome.
Siobhan, glad your good food and good babies helped to cheer you.
That works for me, too.
I didn't know they count stairs! That would be fun.
Couldn't sleep last night so I took a Benadryl about midnight. Consequently I am a bit groggy this morning! But I slept well, and I feel rested. Having a cup of chai. I read Mark's post with great interest yesterday. I have always made my own chai, something I learned to do when I lived in a working-class neighborhood outside of London and frequented the local Indian food storefront. They got to know us, a group of very poorly paid American flight attendants sharing a run-down house, and invited us to come round the back when the shop in front was closed. The matriarch of the tribe would let us in, pile up a plate for us, and fuss over us as we ate, supplying fresh naan every few minutes. I miss that! I make chai the way she did, by boiling the milk with the spices in it for awhile, then adding the tea, and water near the end. Great stuff.
Well, my ennui and disillusionment with the world is still with me but greatly lessened. I don't know why I feel like this. I wish I could learn not to worry. I worry about everything. Money. Health. My mom. Worry without positive action is destructive, but I still fall prey to it.
Worry is your imagination working for evil instead of good, so how about starting a creative project that requires your imagination? Painting, hand work, wood work, collage?
Not that, um, I am always able to take this advice, but there it is.
I went to the Y and swam and swam. I'm getting to be pretty good as far as endurance. I can swim for awhile without resting. When I'm good and warmed up and maybe a little bored, I do some sprints.
It's snowing but no accumulation. Everyone is complaining about how cold it is. Why? It isn't that cold. And it is late November in Maine. It's beautiful and peaceful.
I took two ornaments from the gift tree at the Y. One is for an eight-year-old girl and says "anything animal." I got a toy horse and rider set. There is a horse and a girl and some tack, so you can saddle the horse and whatnot. Do you think that is okay? Also a little book about how to draw animals, with space to draw. It says age eight+, so I thought she might like that. The pictures in the book are really nice even if you don't draw in it, all sorts of animals.
The other ornament is more specific, an 11-year-old girl wants the movie "Warhorse." I'll get something else to go with it, I'm not sure what.
I was able to get another horse movie, an old classic called "King of the Wind," totally family friendly. It was only $5, and it pushed me into a gift coupon, so the two films ended up costing less than just the one film.
When I signed out the ornaments, I asked if there were any guidelines for buying the gifts, and director said, no, anything at all is fine. Anything. Because these kids don't get gifts. They will be happy if they have something to unwrap. That just breaks my heart. I put a twenty in the party jar - they are having a holiday dinner for them. I'm getting all teary-eyed thinking about this. I grew up in pretty limited circumstances, but we always had everything we needed. Clothes, food, warm house, and yes, presents at Christmas and birthdays. I don't want to go too overboard buying for the two girls I already have, because I think I should take another ornament or two and make sure everyone has something. Some of the ornaments asked for things like boots, coats, and snowpants. Yikes. I will make sure someone takes them by next week. I'm not a rich person. I'm just a worker bee-type person. And buying the car has set me back considerably. I don't have a lot of extra but I already have everything I need. I certainly have enough warm clothes, boots, and coats to last the rest of my life. Okay, I have to stop thinking about this or I will get too upset.
I'm sorry you are feeling ennui and disillusionment with the world. I am glad it's getting a bit better. I am feeling much the same (even before my car was broken into). I wonder if it is just the onset of Winter. My Doctor told me to get one of those lamps to help with light levels and SAD, I'm not sure it helps though.
I used to take anti-depressants, but I really don't like taking pills so I don't. I just try to be cognizant of my moods and I forgive myself for not getting as much exercise as I should. In the past I'd eat and drink too much, especially around the holidays, which ultimately made matters worse.
It sounds like you are doing all of the right things. I hope you feel better soon!
Height: 5' 10"
Starting Weight: 292
Starting Primal Weight: 275
Current weight: 224
Goal weight: 172
Body Fat 30.5