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    RittenRemedy's Avatar
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    A Little Bit of R & R

    [EXPLICIT] The Road so far…

    I’m the type of fat kid that, when I try to explain to people, they don’t believe me. I was chubby in kindergarten, and, despite fervent hopes that I would grow into something better like the heroes and heroines of the books I loved, I grew to be a tall, fat, awkward, quiet teen. I did not develop any hidden talents for sports, physical attractiveness, social eloquence, or mad dance skills after imbibing the holy water of Irish whiskey.

    When I entered high school, I weighed 180 pounds and wore a size 18 badly. While I grew to accept some things, I knew my weight was my own fault. After all, we learned in health class that all you had to do to lose weight was eat less and exercise more. It was that simple, but after adopting my standard lunch of a pack of whole grain crackers and a bowl of mushy strawberries, I had only lost a couple pounds at most. I tried exercising, but I was so exhausted even before school was over that I mostly spent the weekends asleep to make up for it.

    I did have a little talent for swimming, and my events were the ones that make people vomit. All of them: 200 IM, 500 free, 100 fly, and alternating in the medley relay (50 fly) or freestyle relay (100 free). Of course, you can’t diet and do that, but somehow I managed to eat French fries and cheese, spaghetti, and lots of peanut butter jelly sandwiches and still lose 40 pounds. With a handful of records hanging in the gym and a group of fellow outcasts of outcasts, I didn’t exactly feel great, but I had some hope.


    Self and otherwise Reliance

    I wouldn’t say I was depressed. I had friends who were “depressed” and had “suicide attempts,” and I had a friend who had lost three family members to suicide and somehow managed to keep her head above water most of the time. I was middle class Irish Catholic from a city in the Midwest, but I knew how that water felt. Fucking cold and unpleasant. From high school through college, I spent as much time as I could in the world of the stories I wrote. Taking place largely in the subtropics, the water there was warm.

    I studied fine arts in college. I was also poor, so vegetarianism made sense. My dietary staples became pasta, oats, peanut butter, fruit, bread, frozen vegetables, nori, milk, and Kraft cheese. If I had some money, I bought eggs or maybe even went out for a burrito. Without the support of a home cooked dinner, or even the empty calories of junk food, and despite working in an awesome gym, my energy tanked and I gained twenty pounds.

    Sophomore year, I withdrew from college and joined the Army. I entered and left basic training at 158 pounds; though I did manage to lose a couple inches somewhere out in the field. After spending some time in California, I again “cleaned up” my diet and became whole foods vegetarian. My weight gradually escalated along with my “cleansing” to the mid seventies on a strict vegan 80% raw diet. This time when I crashed, I crashed hard.


    Building a new Road

    It broke my heart that I could be eating this nearly perfect diet and yet watch as something else in me broke. I got really sick. The Army’s PT test is not all that hard, but add in a persistent, endless, throbbing, nauseating, blinding headache for several weeks, randomly dropping blood pressure, and ataxia, and it gets a little harder. Failing will end a career faster than just about any crime. Luckily for me, not long after adding milk, cheese, eggs, beans, fish a few times a week, chicken once or twice, and maybe a bi-monthly piece of lamb, my headache went away, and the other symptoms came back into the safe zone. I was still crashing every couple hours, still sickly, still sleeping as soon as I got off work until PT in the morning, but I managed.

    One of my NCOs mentioned Gary Taubes, and I read through both of his books with all of the devil’s advocate I could muster. I was such an idiot. During my raw vegan daze, I had stumbled across the blog, Mark’s Daily Apple, and while I really enjoyed the concept, I couldn’t rectify the differences between the wild recommendations from the blog and anything I knew up to that point. (yes, yes, I know.) After reading Taubes, I read everything I could get my hands on from MDA to Whole9, Michael Pollan, Lustig, Enig, hell even WAPF, other holistic health promoters, and their competitors, all with the sort of critical fire only an impending convert can feel.

    Fuck it, what did I have to lose? For starters, the blood sugar issues that had bothered me my whole life, the stifling fatigue, and a heck of a lot of negativity.

    I’ve been eating mostly in line with paleo/primal since spring of 2012. There’s been such a shocking increase in my general health, wellbeing, and sense of self that I almost don’t believe what I’ve just written myself. The bad days now still suck, but they pass, and the good days are actually pretty good. It’s been a long while since I’ve slipped under the water. I’m still struggling with weight and lingering immune weakness and IBS, not to mention a very jacked up shoulder, but at least now I’ve got some good tools, I know with some certainty I’m wheat intolerant, and I know, apparently, that I just have to go against what everyone else says.

    Like that’s new. I just gotta be a little Rebel.


    And finally, some stats:

    Starting weight: 169.8 pounds, 34.3% body fat (tape method)
    Current weight: 152.6, 29.80% body fat
    Goal weight: 140, 24% body fat or less. I have plenty to lose, but I'm hoping to convert a bit of weight to muscle too so the weight is kind of just a number.

    2 minute pushups s/c/g: 17/--/28 <== this is the Army PT test
    2 minute sit-ups: 57/62/64
    2 mile run: 19.30/17.14/18.06

    Dead lift: <== will be added soon, shoulder willing
    Squat:
    500 free:
    100 fly:
    Last edited by RittenRemedy; 07-17-2014 at 07:58 PM. Reason: updates

  2. #2
    Driedmango's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by RittenRemedy View Post
    WOW
    Okay, enough of this asinine tomfoolery (or unmitigated poppycock as it were).
    Haha that made me giggle. Read it out in a British accent in my head.

    I was actually going to comment on your first post but then I read the bit where you said you wanted it to be ignored soooo!

    Anyway, it sounds like you're pretty in tune with what works for your body. Your main issue sounds like just general stress/ a feeling of being overwhelmed. Although I can't tell you how to deal with your stress (other than talking it out - you can spam me/other MDA people or journal or talk to someone you know)but maybe the bit about being unprepared - can you pack food to take with you instead of a day of only eating pizza like you mentioned?

    As for no time/energy for exercise, maybe squeeze in a 20 minute work out. A friend on here showed me Fitness Blender videos and they have some really quick ones and you can do them at home.

    Everyone slips up btw, and you shouldn't doubt your ability to achieve what you want because of it. You already seem to know what to do and how to achieve your goals. Shit happens! Flush that shit and carry ooon!

    Im sending this from my phone, so i'm sorry if any of it is jumbled or weird etc.

    Good luck !
    Attitudes are contagious, make yours worth catching.

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    Quote Originally Posted by RittenRemedy View Post
    That's cool I'm working from my phone too.

    Also my first reaction was EEEK I'VE BEEN FOUND OUT. But thanks a lot for the kind words. I know it is 97% stress with me.
    Im fairly certain 90% of the journals on here have at least one 'i'm feeling shit about myself and life so here's a giant super negative rant' post. Mine has more than one, haha.

    You're very welcome! Are you stressed about something in particular, or just life being super busy etc? Journalling can be pretty therapeutic, and people on here are (mostly) very supportive and insightful.
    Attitudes are contagious, make yours worth catching.

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    The problem isn't that we slip up occasionally. The problem is if there's a pattern we resist learning from and developing a strategy to deal with.

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    A few things I have been thinking about recently.

    One is how to schedule meals and workouts when I get back to work. I will have little time between PT and work which is 12 hour shifts with a hopeful but not guaranteed lunch and dinner break. I am thinking to grab something small and protein heavy (something egg or dairy based) for breakfast and pack a BAS for lunch to eat on the job. That way I can use my lunch break to go the the gym (for a real workout) or walk or run errands. Then I'll have time for a nicer meal at dinner.

    It's not my favorite schedule because large meals rarely sit well with me, but I guess if I can get the BAS BA enough, dinner won't need to be a calorie bomb in the evening. I am really looking forward to some chill time at lunch too.

    I am ordering Starting Strength, and I need to make an appointment regarding my shoulder. Very contradictory. To be honest, I want a permanent profile just so I can explain that this is bad because it causes injury. You'd think that would be so simple but no. I don't know how that's going to go though. I probably won't tell my doctor about wanting to lift, but I also won't be an idiot and start out with much weight or anything that hurts. So far I've had pretty damn good luck doing the opposite of what the doctors say. Who knows, I could still be riding the blood sugar roller coaster and limping around in orthotics.

    Finally, call the Whole9 police because I'm about to say something controversial. I see a bunch of people here, and I think it's increasing, with problems possibly tied to malnutrition (hair loss, persistent low energy, just wild and crazy things that are very reminiscent of the raw foodist "detox") being put down as carb flu or some other popular diagnosis.

    There are a lot of smart people here, but let me tell you they usually aren't the ones reminding me frighteningly of the witch hunters over at 30 bananas with their cries of "detox the carb eater!" (Carbs not being the only, but a common one) Nobody reads my journal anyway, BUT IF ANYONE DOES AND YOUR HAIR IS FALLING OUT, you're probably not doing what's best for yourself. Quit that and try something else, possibly not so extreme, and covering all your nutrients both macro and micro for awhile. EDIT because of this beautiful statement: "Don't worry about "paleo purity points", contrary to popular belief you don't get a gold star from Robb Wolf or Mark Sisson when you earn 1000 PPP."

    Tl;dr: don't give your body something unhealthy and then expect it to become healthy just because you have "faith." Faith is for the soul; food is for the body.
    Last edited by RittenRemedy; 10-06-2013 at 06:21 PM.

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    Quote Originally Posted by RittenRemedy View Post
    Finally, call the Whole9 police because I'm about to say something controversial. I see a bunch of people here, and I think it's increasing, with problems possibly tied to malnutrition (hair loss, persistent low energy, just wild and crazy things that are very reminiscent of the raw foodist "detox") being put down as carb flu or some other popular diagnosis.

    Tl;dr: don't give your body something unhealthy and then expect it to become healthy just because you have "faith." Faith is for the soul; food is for the body.
    Hey dude. Totally agree with you here. I'm seeing it as well and it scares me shitless (I wish that was literal, with my gut...). I really really dislike every chalking symptoms up to "carb flu". I wish more people would advocate a gradual reduction. If someone says, "I'm coming off a very high carb diet with lots of processed foods," I think they should absolutely indulge in some starchy carbs & fruit for a bit. Take it primal first, adjust macros later.
    Journal on depression/anxiety
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    Korean dinner win (again)

    ImageUploadedByMarks Daily Apple Forum1381570992.473623.jpg

    This restaurant has an in house butcher, and when you walk in the door you are surrounded by this wonderful aroma of grilling beef. Ahh, nothing else has that scent. I am definitely grilling my onions from now on. I don't care if I get looks of blasphemy from the locals.

    ImageUploadedByMarks Daily Apple Forum1381571148.159277.jpg

    For anyone in Suwon, the restaurant is called Jinshim Hanoo (진심한우), on the Na Hyeseok road (나혜석거리) and it is totally worth checking out the whole area. Cool place, great restaurants, beer everywhere, and mostly no cars.

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    Things I (maybe) learned on leave regarding my diet

    So I just took a massive leave in America and back in Korea with my mom (who I told about my WOE and, though not specifically PB, Mark's blog. Hi mom. Love you). I didn't have a scale and all of my meals were eaten out once we hit Korea (most of them stateside were too, though it wasn't really my choice).

    I actually lost a little weight, so I'm down to where I was pre vegan. I did do a higher carb, because while I will gladly eat beef soup and grilled pork belly most days, sometimes you just have to sample the local delicacies of fish and medicinal cuisine (which ended up to be lots of delicious things followed by lots of things fermented to levels as high as a Grateful Dead concert).

    A few things I noticed that I am going to either utilize or learn from.

    I don't do well on starch in the morning, or really anytime other than right before bed. I just crash too hard. On the days when my carb exceeded 140g, or I ate it too much unbalanced towards one meal, my blood sugar go wild really on either sugar or starch, but rice was always worse than a breakfast of yogurt and sweetened tea even.

    I felt better if I kept meat and rice separate, just as an example. Though my digestive issues didn't really go away, I felt a ton better after a couple days eating excessively fermented fish and vegetables and grilled pork belly. I really think the ferments had something to do with it, though I don't have any proof.

    Most days we skipped breakfast and ate one big meal for either lunch or dinner and light for the other. This would be ideal if I wasn't stuck at work and not aloud to leave when I was hungry. Getting hungry at work before I can leave is really difficult because there are an unbelievable amount of unhealthy things to eat. Seriously, if you love your soldier, send them meat not cookies and cheap chips.

    We walked for probably four to ten hours every day. I really think this is where the weightloss came in. Just a really low impact, slow walk with a couple hills and lots of stuff to see and do and good things to eat. No wonder Koreans are (generally) healthier and lighter than Americans. I got it. A new diet book. But this time we won't limit macros, just sell your car.

    I wish I wasn't stuck at a desk for twelve (YES FUCKING TWELVE) hours, but that's something I'll have to figure out, because while I agree that it I may be 80% diet, that 20% exercise is loaded in my case. I gotta get into a pool again or something. Just hoping we get to stay on this schedule longer than the last one. Probably not though, as new first sergeants tend to think the other guy was a complete idiot and he can do better before understanding the mission.
    Last edited by RittenRemedy; 11-28-2013 at 07:27 AM.

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    Today is a special day kiddos; it's market day aka curry day! What this means is I've finally made it through the eight pounds of wonderful Aussie brisket, and now I need more meat. But before that, I catch the bus into town and walk to the Indian restaurant for some mutton curry, rice, and chai.

    The butcher had some really nice looking beef shoulder, so I got a couple kilos of that. I'll pick up the rest of my list at the commissary, providing they have it.

    And then I think I'll dose my shoulder in preparation for the PT test and crash for a little.

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    Hope you enjoy your curry, RR

    And thanks for reminding me to pick up some mutton (maybe goat). We haven't had a Mutton curry for a few weeks.
    If you're interested in my (very) occasional updates on how I'm working out and what I'm eating click here.

    Quote Originally Posted by tfarny View Post
    If you are new to the PB - please ignore ALL of this stuff, until you've read the book, or at least http://www.marksdailyapple.com/primal-blueprint-101/

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