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Thread: Fibromyalgia and Fat - Tomi's story page 78

  1. #771
    Judg's Avatar
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    Congratulations on the progress! So nice to see and feel things that don't depend on the number on the scale.

    Okay time to go back to an avatar of your real face, if it's getting thinner. Seriously, I keep getting you and Pedidoc confused.
    5'2", 55 years, Primal since April. Pre-Primal weight loss, from 216.6 to 157.8
    Primal low: 140.2 (Dec. 3) Goal weight: 135?
    Main Primal goal: beating back my CFS enough to function more normally and start writing again

    More and more, our life has been governed by specialists, who know too little of what lies outside their province to be able to know enough about what takes place within it.
    - Lewis Mumford

  2. #772
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    Quote Originally Posted by Judg View Post
    Congratulations on the progress! Seriously, I keep getting you and Pedidoc confused.
    I have the long nose, Judg!
    Female 52 travel for business monthly
    Starting wt: 198, Goal: 135, Current with PB: 160
    Started at a size 16 down to loose 10

    With PB my asthma has improved, low back pain is gone, & I've got more energy

    My Primal Journal: http://www.marksdailyapple.com/forum/thread60175.html

  3. #773
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    Yes - and I have the long ears! Seriously if I could take a decent picture I'd post it! My Zeus is so much cuter!

    Today I posted just over 200 miles for the year - walking and biking totals. I'm very proud of that! I'm kicking fibromyalgia in the butt!

    I'm just ending day 4 of the 21 day challenge and I'm right on course so far. Yesterday was slightly high on calories, but nothing to worry too much about - only 200 calories over my desired limit. I've been grain free, sugar free and alcohol free. I've met my movement goals so far - tomorrow is necessary body weight day!!!! If this is how the entire 21 days will be then I'm going to succeed tremendously! Sure hoping the scales are nice to me. I haven't taken any measurements of my body so nothing to compare that way.

    Time to go to bed......... I'm missing my 10 pm bedtime by 30 minutes so far.
    Read post #2626
    my motivation

    As per Marcadav:
    Do 30-60 days clean primal.
    No grains, sugar, alcohol.
    Eat 3 meals and primal snacks.
    Don't track food.
    Don't tweak.
    Don't expect issues to go away quickly. Instead, just follow the plan and see how things play out.
    Decide on an exercise plan you can/will do consistently during the 30-60 days and then do it.

  4. #774
    Pedidoc's Avatar
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    Way to go Tomi! You are motivating me to do the challenge - I just need a stretch of time at home in the beginning to get on the right track.

    And I agree about pictures - I never take decent ones! Latte is much more photogenic.
    Last edited by Pedidoc; 09-15-2012 at 04:44 AM.
    Female 52 travel for business monthly
    Starting wt: 198, Goal: 135, Current with PB: 160
    Started at a size 16 down to loose 10

    With PB my asthma has improved, low back pain is gone, & I've got more energy

    My Primal Journal: http://www.marksdailyapple.com/forum/thread60175.html

  5. #775
    Judg's Avatar
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    Sorry ladies, I disagree. You are cuter than your dogs. Okay, I don't think I've seen a picture of Pedi yet, but I very much doubt I would have to retract.

    Measurements are not necessary. Your clothes are very good at telling you how you're doing in that department. I'm so glad you can feel your progress.
    5'2", 55 years, Primal since April. Pre-Primal weight loss, from 216.6 to 157.8
    Primal low: 140.2 (Dec. 3) Goal weight: 135?
    Main Primal goal: beating back my CFS enough to function more normally and start writing again

    More and more, our life has been governed by specialists, who know too little of what lies outside their province to be able to know enough about what takes place within it.
    - Lewis Mumford

  6. #776
    tomi's Avatar
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    Slept weird last night. I went to bed a little to late - so missed my bedtime goal for the challenge. Went to sleep fine, but woke up my normal to many times to pee......... then I woke up at 4:30, got up to pee - and couldn't go back to sleep. My mind was buzzing with disconnected thoughts and parts of songs and all kinds of weirdness! I finally forced myself to focus on a calm peaceful scene and fell back to sleep around 6:00. I was awake again at 7:30.

    I walked for 45 minutes this morning. Had to stop and chat a few times with neighbors. We have a great neighborhood! But I deducted that time - so I only logged my actual walking time. I think I'll go for another bike ride later today. But I do need to mow the yard, and according to my pedometer that alone is a mile of walking. I think I'll try it again today and see if I get that same reading. I don't see how its possible, but it could be.

    Today I'm going to replace a light switch that is going bad. I've been waiting for hubby to do it - but he seems to forget until he goes to turn it on and it doesn't work. I'll have to go to Home Depot and get one. I also need to get some stuff to lower to pH in the pond - the stuff that I got 3 weeks ago doesn't seem to be working. And Zues needs dog food. And its time for fall clean up in the yard. Some of the perrenials are done for the year and need to cut - I think I'm going to take out the roses - I just hate the maintenance and upkeep of roses. And they jab me too much!

    Thats a good start to the weekend projects...........

    Breakfast was BACON!!!!! yummy. I took out a pork shoulder to put in the crock pot for tomorrow. Not sure what dinner will be tonight. I cooked salmon last night and I think there is enough for dinner tonight.

    Had a "talk" with my son last about his plans for moving out. He says he's working on things, but he's still struggling with the anxiety issues. He's working on his "self" stuff now - has the money saved for the downpayment on a house - just doesn't have the courage yet to make the phone call. I don't understand the extent of his anxieties - but I know they are almost crippling. I don't know what to do to help him. I don't want to be an enabler and allow him to stay prisoner to his fears --- I also don't want to push him beyond his limits and cause more damage. I'm thinking of requiring him to pay some rent to live here. I mean, he makes very good money and certainly can afford it. And it isn't like we have FREE water or electricity or food. He does buy some of his own food, mostly breakfast stuff - never dinner food. I uncomfortable asking him to pay to live in his own home - but he is 26 years old! I think its okay to ask him to be responsible for his own living expenses. I'm thinking $300 - $500 a month. I need to talk to him about it and see what he says. But, if he wants to buy and home and rent out rooms, then he must have an idea of what rooms rent for now. I don't know......... I need to make him grasp his adulthood and paying ones own way is usually the first lesson to be had.

    any thoughts?
    Read post #2626
    my motivation

    As per Marcadav:
    Do 30-60 days clean primal.
    No grains, sugar, alcohol.
    Eat 3 meals and primal snacks.
    Don't track food.
    Don't tweak.
    Don't expect issues to go away quickly. Instead, just follow the plan and see how things play out.
    Decide on an exercise plan you can/will do consistently during the 30-60 days and then do it.

  7. #777
    Judg's Avatar
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    I told my kids up front that they were welcome to stay at home for free as long as they were students. Once they were out of school, they were welcome to stay. As adults. Which meant helping with chores and paying a low rent to defray our extra costs in keeping them here. They had no trouble with that, although the chores aspect didn't work out quite so well. They'd do things if asked, but I wanted them to be on auto-pilot. But there was no argument about the principle. Hubby found it a bit weird, because Italians do things differently, but he let me.

    Instituting that a bit later would be a bit more difficult, but not that much, it seems to me. Just tell him that he is an adult with a job, and there is no good reason why you should be subsidizing his living expenses. He consumes utilities, after all. So a base amount to cover utilities and general wear and tear, more if he eats your food, and more yet if he doesn't pull his weight in maintenance. If you wanted, you could salt it all away, and give it to him to put on his down payment once he finally makes the plunge. (Don't tell him you're going to do that.)

    I can't speak to the anxiety issues, but he probably won't address them as long as doing so is more painful than not doing so. That's just human nature. You might have a talk about that and encourage him to get moving.
    5'2", 55 years, Primal since April. Pre-Primal weight loss, from 216.6 to 157.8
    Primal low: 140.2 (Dec. 3) Goal weight: 135?
    Main Primal goal: beating back my CFS enough to function more normally and start writing again

    More and more, our life has been governed by specialists, who know too little of what lies outside their province to be able to know enough about what takes place within it.
    - Lewis Mumford

  8. #778
    tomi's Avatar
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    Thanks for the insight, Judg. I'm mulling over the idea of telling him its time to "pay" for his keep. As for chores, he doesn't do much, but does do his own laundry, cleans his bathroom (when I ask), buys some of his own food, and will do little things like empty or fill the dishwasher when he see's its needed. He is charge of garbage and mail pickup. Not much in the big picture - but he isn't totally free loading. Just mostly. He's has a LARGE savings account, and is whittling away at his student loans. The only thing stopping him from moving forward on the home buying is his anxiety.

    We had a talk last night after he got home from work. He said he is working on the anxiety issues by doing internet research and self-help forums. I'm not sure thats the right path, but at least he is pursuing something in the right direction. I didn't mention the rent idea - yet. But I will in the coming weeks. He knows my desire is for him to make the steps necessary to be on his own, he has the same desires, but the anxieties tend to override that desire. I'm not sure how hard to push......... people with this problem tend to retreat further when they feel they are being pushed into a corner. Everything becomes so extremely overwhelming that they crawl into a hole to protect themselves. When he was first diagnosed (formally) with this condition, Extreme Social Anxiety and Borderline Agoraphobic, I did a LOT of research on the subject. People with this type of stuggle have a 70% likelyhood of attempting suicide. Life is so seemingly insurrmountable that ending it is often the desired option. I greatly fear that - and so I tread lightly. I have to assure him that I love him, support him, believe in him -- but must encourage him to fight to move forward. Its not easy. Its not normal. The most difficult part to accept is his potential so far exceeds his effort! At the age of 8 we discovered he had an IQ of 142. Yet, he was flunking all his schoolwork from sheer laziness. He says he is trying to find what he wants to do with his life........ but he can't find in any interest in anything. I had him tested for Aspergers at the same time we were testing for the anxiety stuff - the Psychologist said he didn't have it - but I'm wondering if the test results were off. He is totally appathetic about everything in life. Although he does laugh and enjoy things, he says he feels no passion about anything. UGH..... I could go on for hours about this! I've been dealing with it for 18 years! Before the age of 8 he was a normal little boy - happy, smart, and I could see nothing wrong. Then he was bullied by some boys in school - and his whole personality changed. He became withdrawn and didn't care about anything. Like that little bit of bullying just kicked all the life out of him.

    I believe this is part of the stress that brought on the fibromyalgia. I went through a divorce, graduated college, was faced with making my own way for the first time in my life at the age of 40, and dealing with a troubled son. It was a lot of stress!!!! Thats when I started gaining weight too. Slowly at first........ a couple pounds in the first year - then, when I moved to Oregon and married my hubby the stress of trying to blend our families, get my son through school and worry about his future, and marital issues because hubby didn't know he was supposed to be the boss (no his daughters) ---- UGH! 70 pounds in 5 years.

    Now however.............. THAT is mostly behind me - all but getting my son to tackle his life - I'm on the mend emotionally and physically. How on earth do people get through this life without the saving grace of God! I will never understand the unbelieving spirit. But........ I don't judge - I just don't understand how you can face each day without knowing the Creator. Baffles me. This world is a hard place to be!!!!!

    Well, I so did not expect all that to come flowing forth - but hey, its my journal, and I guess thats what its for. Working through ALL of the things that contribute to poor health and weight issues.
    Read post #2626
    my motivation

    As per Marcadav:
    Do 30-60 days clean primal.
    No grains, sugar, alcohol.
    Eat 3 meals and primal snacks.
    Don't track food.
    Don't tweak.
    Don't expect issues to go away quickly. Instead, just follow the plan and see how things play out.
    Decide on an exercise plan you can/will do consistently during the 30-60 days and then do it.

  9. #779
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    Judg has a good idea. My sister moved into my mom's house with her two kids after she left her husband. My grandpa owned the house (he lets my stepdad live there as part of his salary for working on the farm) and felt my sister needed to pay rent. He charged her $50 a month to "cover the increased expense for utilities", but he actually socked it all away for her. When she moved out, she had a $600 savings account she wasn't prepared for and it helped her immensely! (He later bought the house she's living in now). I think charging him enough money to push him to move out is a good idea, and then socking it into a savings account for him will help him with things he may not be thinking about - like curtains, paint, etc. I'm thinking maybe $100-$200 a month. Or 1/3 of the household expenses, if you feel so inclined. 1/3 of the mortgage, 1/3 of electric, gas, cable, internet, etc.

    And do you have ANY idea how badly I want to copy your "I'm kicking fibromyalgia in the butt" comment and place it as my status with the whole "- Tomi" thing like a famous quote?? The urge is intense. You should make it YOURS and I can "share" it!!!!
    Primal since March 5, 2012
    SW: 221 | CW: 182 | LPW: 166 | UGW: 140 (80 lbs loss)




  10. #780
    tomi's Avatar
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    Ask and Ye shall receive
    Read post #2626
    my motivation

    As per Marcadav:
    Do 30-60 days clean primal.
    No grains, sugar, alcohol.
    Eat 3 meals and primal snacks.
    Don't track food.
    Don't tweak.
    Don't expect issues to go away quickly. Instead, just follow the plan and see how things play out.
    Decide on an exercise plan you can/will do consistently during the 30-60 days and then do it.

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