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Thread: Fibromyalgia and Fat - Tomi's story page 36

  1. #351
    jenn26point2's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by tomi View Post
    girl from high school *snipped*
    This reminds me of a girl I work with, who I refer to as Work Friend. She's bipolar and does a lot of this same stuff.

    Eating a strict paleo diet can shed the extra "thin" fat that causes the tummy to be pouched a bit. Mark wrote about it, but I don't remember when. I think it was an article about loose skin or something. It was recent.
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  2. #352
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    Oh, and I read all that drivel, too.
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  3. #353
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    Quote Originally Posted by Candy in Wonderland View Post
    Tomi, before getting a tummy tuck, think about it, really. I had one years ago, because the muscles in my belly were so stretched out after 3 pregnancies (and I didn't 'do' small babies, the smallest one is my middle son, who was 8.48 lb, the heaviest youngest son at 10.03 lb) my tummy was literally resting on my legs when I sat down . That was gone after the tummy tuck, but I have a massive scar going from side to side, which is above my underwear, and there's a spot around my belly button that never got sensitive again. So weird, when I'm touched there I don't feel it! And my tummy still has an "odd" shape :s .
    It'll probably never even be an option - basically if I had enough money to get a tummy tuck - I'd save it for a kitchen remodel! I'm vain - but not that vain! My tummy is saggy, you know, that little bit of hangover at the bikini line? I'm hoping when the weight is all gone that little hang over that is enough to roll up in my palm - will be a thing that is so small it won't really bother me. I mean, we all have to have those tell tale signs of aging - and a saggy tummy is just part of it!

    Have you seen the movie "Mrs. Doubtfire" ???? Remember the part where Robin Williams is putting on his chubby old lady suit? Last time I saw that movie (I was 20 pounds heavier, mind you!) I about died! I said - "OH MY GOSH!!! thats what I look like naked!" and promptly hung my head in shame! UGH! I want to be able to look in the mirror and NOT see back fat, or that nasty bulge at the bra line under my arms! And what I most don't want to see is my belly hanging down like a deflated tire tube! That thought keeps me on track when I'm really wanting to cheat!

    .............. and yesterday I did cheat. My first cheat in an entire week - so although I messed up - I'm very proud of myself for going an entire week and staying 100% paleo. What did I cheat on? (I hear you asking........) chocolate chip/oatmeal/peanut butter cookie dough! DAMN! I made it through baking them last weekend for my husbands fishing trip (they were a big hit btw), and then yesterday I couldn't resist - I got the rest of the dough out of the freezer and munched away! GRRRR I'm so mad at myself. But.............. it was just one cheat........... it didn't kill me. I'm back on track today, and I have my resolve again. Maybe I will be doing Whole7 over and over and over -- instead of whole30. I can do a week - but, I'm not sure I can do an entire month. I went a week - so maybe I will challenge myself to do 9 days with no cheats ---- and then 11 days ---- get the picture? Like Judg once told me "schedule cheats". Again - she's a wise one! We should all listen to Judg! I'm going to go to my food journal and do just that! I'm going to put a cheat on my schedule!

    Didn't go to work today cuz the tummy was doing bad things this morning. See - only one dose of calcium yesterday, and I had diarrhea today. So far the extra iron isn't helping in that area. I've yet to be constipated. I need to start taking the second dose at bedtime, that should be easier than trying to remember to take them with dinner.

    Graduation for oldest step daughter this saturday. I wonder if I have anything to wear? Should check I guess. Means having too see her mom ---- ick. I really hate having to be in the same room with that woman! Okay - history lesson: When my husband and I were in our late teens and very early 20's we were dating --- then he gets antsy and thinks there is something better out there........... so he starts seeing other girls....... and I wait for him to get this out of his system. Two years go by, he's still coming to see me (secretly) while dating her. When I get wind of his plans to marry her - I end it all. I marry on the rebound 4 months later. Fast forward 20 years --- and our lives are brought together again when we find out both our marriages have ended in divorce. We get married! So........ ex wife is the girl who stole my man! And then, after 15 years of marriage, she decides to gets antsy and has an affair with a much younger man......... leaves her husband for the other guy! So, not only did she steal my man but then she broke his heart! I don't like that woman......... at all! And so now for the past 10 years I've had to endure seeing her at all the girls events and special days. It sucks! Life gets messy sometimes............. I'm glad my ex lives in New Mexico! I don't ever have to worry about seeing him.

    ugh! bad topic........... bad bad topic!!!! SORRY!
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  4. #354
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    Quote Originally Posted by jenn26point2 View Post
    Eating a strict paleo diet can shed the extra "thin" fat that causes the tummy to be pouched a bit. Mark wrote about it, but I don't remember when. I think it was an article about loose skin or something. It was recent.
    I'm gonna see if I can find that......... thanks.

    Edit: I did find it! It was a great article - I also read the linked article my martin (somebody) about adipose tissue and how to get rid of the stubborn fat once the major weight loss is over. Good stuff. I'm going to refer my son to the martin article. He has lost 115 pounds over the past 2 years (CW methods, but at least he isn't 280 pounds anymore) but he is fighting a bit of stubborn fat on his belly and love handle area. He's doing P90X faithfully. He's eating close to primal, out of necessity cuz its all I have in the house pretty much) - but he's not a big veggie/fruit eater, so its mostly protein and a little bad carbs. Anyway, I think it will help him with that last bit of fat and sag. Overall, he looks pretty darn good.

    So, my issue is obviously fat deposits, and not really saggy skin, at this point. When I get down to my goal weight of 135 I will revisit the issue and try the fasting that martin says will help get rid of it. thanks for the heads up!
    Last edited by tomi; 06-12-2012 at 05:04 PM.
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  5. #355
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    My issue is saggy skin, for sure. Five pregnancies, the last two with excessive starting weights, are big culprits. I will almost certainly need a tummy tuck, although "need" is a bit subjective there. But I am going to wait until after I've finished losing weight. My mother can get me a family price at the clinic she works for, might be worth the trip. I'll price it all when I get there. FWIW, she is very happy with her own.

    I have heard that plastic surgery in general is cheaper in Canada, for reasons I can not fathom. Might be something to check out if you get serious. You're not that far.

    You know, I've been meaning to cheat with a bowl of pasta or something to test how intolerant I am to wheat, and I have been having a very hard time bringing myself to do it. Can you believe it? I LOVE pasta. But I'm spooked now. I'm afraid it will make me feel really sick. My digestive tract hasn't been too happy the last couple of days and I'm wondering if it isn't because Sunday's tomato sauce had had pasta cooked in it (home-made canneloni). And I'm developing something of a sugar phobia too. Even the lesser evils like maple syrup I am avoiding more and more. This might be a mental health issue, but seeing as it is probably helping me a great deal on the physical level, I just might let it go... LOL! Although I am saving up for a gelato cheat on a nice hot day in Little Italy... It will be so strange if I can't make myself do it.

    When I was teaching, the junior college I was at allowed 10% of total class time for unjustified absences. More than that, and you were supposed to evict the student from the class. I threw one fellow out a week before the end. I always warned my students when they were on the verge of hitting the 10% mark and he had been warned. He objected. "Everybody else was skipping." "Yes, but they managed their absences. It was their first time. It was your last." And that is how I learned to plan your cheating. And to save it for when it was really worth it. Like a lovely day in late spring when the class is just review and you are doing well. If you cheat every chance you get, it will bite you in the rear.

    As it turned out, that conversation took place in the language lab, and I realized afterward that I had flipped the wrong lever. It was supposed to be private, but the whole class had heard it. In the end, I didn't mind at all. To have a reputation as a teacher who can't be messed with is not a bad thing.
    5'2", 55 years, Primal since April. Pre-Primal weight loss, from 216.6 to 157.8
    Primal low: 140.2 (Dec. 3) Goal weight: 135?
    Main Primal goal: beating back my CFS enough to function more normally and start writing again

    More and more, our life has been governed by specialists, who know too little of what lies outside their province to be able to know enough about what takes place within it.
    - Lewis Mumford

  6. #356
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    UGH! FIVE pregnancies! that'll do a number on the body for sure. My first pregnancy was twins. So, I got a big belly really fast! I was 21 weeks, but looked almost full term. And I got all the stretch marks that go along with getting big so fast! In my 21st week I started to bleed, a LOT. It was 1 am when I got up to the go the bathroom and was bleeding pretty heavily.....I woke my husband (ex) and we rushed to the hospital .... I lost the babies that next day. It was the most painful thing I've ever had to go through. We named them, and buried them. Amanda Nicole, and Joshua Allen. My twins. I wanted to start trying again as soon as possible, and I got pregnant again 4 months later with no medication. He's now 26 years old......... and I have the baggy belly to show for it!

    Maybe thats a bit too much information - but, this is my journal, so I guess its okay.

    Not a perfectly paleo day - but not too terribly bad.............

    I'm watching Bath Crashers ---- and drooling! Our house is so in need of 3 bathroom make overs --- and a kitchen make over! I probably shouldn't watch HGTV or any of those remodel shows. Plus its 11 pm and I'm still up watching tv and on the computer. shame on me.............

    goodnight all..........
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    Losing children is the worst thing in the world. Hugs to you, Tomi.

  8. #358
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    Quote Originally Posted by Sabine View Post
    Losing children is the worst thing in the world. Hugs to you, Tomi.
    +1

    Agreed. I lost my first pregnancy too, but I lost mine at 6 weeks, before I even had a chance to get used to being pregnant. Drs say it was a "chemical pregnancy" where the hormones were present, but the magic never happened.
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  9. #359
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    I lost a couple too, but earlier. So sorry you had to go through that.

    DIL lost her first one at three months. The second time she started hemorrhaging at 3 months again and lost another one. Then they did the quick-and-dirty bedside ultrasound and said, "We still see a beating heart." I can't even begin to imagine how she felt. She had lost one twin, but kept the other. He is now 2 1/2 and a very beautiful little boy.
    5'2", 55 years, Primal since April. Pre-Primal weight loss, from 216.6 to 157.8
    Primal low: 140.2 (Dec. 3) Goal weight: 135?
    Main Primal goal: beating back my CFS enough to function more normally and start writing again

    More and more, our life has been governed by specialists, who know too little of what lies outside their province to be able to know enough about what takes place within it.
    - Lewis Mumford

  10. #360
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    Yes, losing children is the most difficult thing in this world I believe. But, as women, we know its always a possibility. Statistically, they estimate that 25% of all pregnancies are lost within the first trimester, sometimes without the mother even knowing she was pregnant. My oldest sister lost her first 2 due to a weak cervix (thats why I lost the twins), and my second oldest sister lost her first pregnancy to fetal death, and she had to have a D&C. Her 3rd pregnancy was full term, but the little girl had Trisomy 21, a severe form of Downs Syndrome. Cassie passed away at 3 months. Her 4th pregnancy was lost to very early miscarriage. I lost my twins just 3 months after Cassie passed away, we have them buried next to each other and have a double headstone with a scroll between reading "Cousins". Between us all we have 6 babies in heaven. Not very good odds for this family. We have 4 living, and 6 lost. Our mom also miscarried once. I have one other sister who was just born to have babies, 2 healthy pregancies, to 2 healthy kids. The rest of us were in awe of her!

    Wow - thats a depressing subject. Sorry I brought it up!

    I'm having trouble getting back on the horse, so to speak. I let down my guard and lost my resolve over the weekend --- a few rum/diet cokes, and a few (okay a lot) of cookie dough bites! Both times I ate it I ended up feeling yucky - and achy - so, that is a very good reason to keep it in the freezer and out of my mouth! I think I'm going to just thaw it out - bake it and send it to work with hubby.

    Personal issue follows......... read at your own discretion.

    I'm struggling with and issue so I'm going to work it out here and see if I can come to some resolution. Just found out we are having a big graduation celebration next Sunday at our house for hubby's oldest daughter and hubbies neice - both college grads with degrees in elementary ed. (dumb choice in this economy). So....... Friday, my day off work, will be nothing but house cleaning and shopping. We will do the standard family gathering fare --- Indian food. I hate to say it - but I don't want to have the entire family over here.......... one of the nephews does not know how to control his kids and they make MESSES!!!! I will have to clean the carpets after this party...... I guess I should just go ahead and call someone to do it this time. I have a Bissel Carpet Cleaner - but I think this will call for the professionals. Maybe Stanley Steamer this time. Anyway...... I'm also not thrilled to be celebrating anything for oldest step daughter and that is my main concern. Oh, she has made life difficult over the years. Hubby and I have both been hoping she will find a job in a far away place and be gone long enough to really grow up! But, she isn't having any luck in the job department so she will continue with her schooling and work on her Masters. She's living with her mom now, so shouldn't be giving us any more troubles! But I feel no desire to celebrate her in any way, shape or form!

    Honestly, she's a good girl --- she's just EXTREMELY immature! At 21 years old she was demanding that daddy not ask to talk to me if he calls home and she answers that phone - she insisted she could give me the message and he didn't need to talk to me. And that he sit next to HER while we are watching TV, not me. She also demanded that we not do anything to the house without her knowledge and input! That subject has been an ongoing fight since I first became a part of this family. The last blow up was 1 month before she finally moved out - I was painting the upstairs hallway and she threw an absolute fit! She threatened to pack up and go back to mommies! (yes, she was 21 and still calling them mommy and daddy - and still sharing her time month to month between parents.) FINALLY her dad told her she needed to focus on her own life and stop worrying about what color we paint the walls or where we move the furniture. At the end of the month, she went back to her moms and never came back to our house again. In fact, in the 10 months that she's been gone she has only been here ONCE to visit, and that was because we were putting down the little Dachshound and she was here to say goodbye. Even then, she pulled the same attitude when we showed her the new pergola going up in the backyard - she looked at, didn't say a word - turned around and went back in the house. The girl is 22 years old, and she behaves like a 12 year old. I'm so sick of it!

    So -- I have to just suck it up and do this thing. I'm just hoping the weather is going to be good enough to have it all outside! Then the messy little ones won't grind food into my carpet! They are adorable children - but the parents don't do anything about their messes. Makes the entire family cringe! As for celebrating oldest step daughters accomplishments........ I think I'll just stay in the shadows on this one. The entire time we've been a family (10 years now) I've played the good step mom - always loving, always supportive, always there to throw every party and be at every event. The love and support has never been reciprocated ---- so I don't see any reason to keep putting myself out there. At high school graduation we opened our home to her mom and the extended family on her moms side - did step daughter even say thank you? Nope. I told hubby after that one - NO MORE joint family parties. Mom can go to all the trouble of throwing her own party.

    But for now - I have to get through this one. But I'm not doing anything special for step daughter. If I wanted to get right down to the core of how I feel............ I wish this was a going away party instead of a graduation party. There I said it.

    I have often thought that the cause of my weight gain (which started when hubby and I got married in 2001) was a direct result of the stress brought on by step daughters, and a hubby who wouldn't put his foot down with them. Stress has been a constant in my life for the past 10 years. Up until last August when the girls moved out. Then everything started to calm down and we began to claim our home as OURS. UGH! I married my soul mate.......... but got the thorns of a blended family. I'm just so tired of it and want it to go away.

    My DREAM is for both step daughters to someday come to me and say "I'm sorry for the way I treated you, you were always kind and loving to me, and I treated you badly. Please forgive me." .............. dream on, Tomi. That isn't likely to ever happen because their mom teaches them to never say you're sorry. UGH. Hubby and his ex started out not wanting to have kids .....they should have stuck with that plan.
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