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Thread: My Journey from Sugar Burner to Fat Burner - jenn26point2's Primal Journal page 278

  1. #2771
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    jenn26point2 is offline Senior Member
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    Sabine, I have told him that he doesn't have to buy anything right this minute - that it CAN wait. We CAN finance it later if we have to have it soooo badly that we can't live without it. He has backed off of the 4 wheeler thing, but is still going to contact the guy in-state to offer $1500. Neither of us are at risk of losing our jobs, so I can't even go that route with saying "I want to wait". I have told him how important it is to me to pay off the credit card and he has offered me some of the money for that, but I want to see how much he's planning to blow first.

    There is also the possibility that we'll just buy another boat - a smaller one what is more appropriate for our needs and for the water we fish in. But, probably not this year.

    He is right about one thing... ALL of our money can't go to debts or we'll have no fun in life. He wants to have a bit of fun, and I can respect that. I do sock every free dollar toward our debts now - leaving things tight tight tight, so to have this money in his hand is all too fun for him - and it's all too anxiety inducing for me b/c I want to put a name on those dollars and he's not sure what to name them yet (exhaust, 4wheeler, etc). In the meantime, the money sits without a job and that just leads to uncontrolled spending and buyer's remorse later once we've pissed it all away on nothing.

    I'd much rather set some money aside for fun and put the rest to good use. Like, give him 1500 for the 4wheeler and put the rest toward savings or debt reduction. Hopefully the guy will agree to 1500 and we can put this to bed. I don't like having money that has no "job" (which is REALLY going to cause problems for me once we're debt free and have no use for our money... interesting concept).


    *****

    Tomi, I would LOVE a gardening friend.
    Primal since March 5, 2012
    SW: 221 | CW: 182 | LPW: 166 | UGW: 140 (80 lbs loss)




  2. #2772
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    It sounds like you guys could use a good conversation where you come up with an agreeable plan for how to save your money. Hulky and I had a similar discussion recently where he discussed his indulgences and I realized that I don't really have any, and that's what draws me to eat junk food. Even though it doesn't seem to make sense, you have to give yourself a monetary outlet so you don't go insane just trying to save up all the time. It's just not reasonable. I used to be better about giving myself little allowances, in college, but I wasn't pinching pennies back then (rent was cheap, the rest of my income was disposable, I had very little to save up for, short term). I think I will start buying books once or twice a month, all fiction, just something fun.
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  3. #2773
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    My thoughts on money sorta go in the opposite direction. Every dollar has a job - it just might not be right now. I try to get our bank account built up so when we want something that is more expensive than our monthly income allows for we can just take it out of the bank. Like the new fridge and furniture. We had the money in the bank and we paid cash. But I also totally understand both sides of what you and brad are talking about. I would want to pour everything into getting the bills paid off and be debt free (hence my mission to pay off our mortgage asap) .............. but life can get pretty mundane and stressful without playtime too. I guess its all a balance, huh? Part of the money for the responsible adult things like debt reduction - and part for play time to maintain the sanity! The tricky part is deciding where the line is drawn between the two. Good luck with the decision making! I'm sure you 2 will come up with a way for both to be happy.
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    my motivation

  4. #2774
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    I think I just have a better sense of responsibility than he does. Dave Ramsey refers to my type as the nerdy type and his type as the free-spirit type. Dave has info out there regarding the free spirit/nerd complex, but I haven't found it yet.

    Here's something - just a small tidbit on it.

    As far as money goes, guys tend to view it as the scoreboard at a football game. It tells us if we are winning. It can be dangerous because men attach their self-esteem to their money. If funds are tight, they tend to get dejected or down on themselves. It's important to remember that the person makes the money, not the other way around.

    For women, money is usually looked at as a security issue. The more they have, the less they have to worry about Murphy visits like a job loss or hospital stay turning their world upside down. That's why an emergency fund is so important to most women. It's a shield, a barrier, against bad things in life.

    Odds are one of you is a nerd who likes everything in place, and the other is a free spirit who actually has a life. This most likely means you will have different approaches and priorities for your money. One of you wants to spend and the other wants to save. When you make a budget, there is one word to remember: compromise.

    You'll have to meet in the middle on almost everything. The best thing you can have here is a giving spirit.

    Your marriage grows stronger each time you give, no matter how small the gesture. This doesn't mean you never get anything you want. It means if both of you approach a situation with a "you first" rather than a "me first" attitude, you'll find much more happiness and much less marriage turmoil.

    https://www.mytotalmoneymakeover.com...iage-and-money
    That being said, b/c I know this, I am willing to compromise with him, but he hasn't read ANYTHING by Dave Ramsey, so he's not aware of our "personality differences" according to Dave, and tends to just get upset and depressed when I tell him we can't do something. He really needs to start reading - Dave Ramsey, Mark Sisson, ANYTHING other than Circle Track magazine.
    Primal since March 5, 2012
    SW: 221 | CW: 182 | LPW: 166 | UGW: 140 (80 lbs loss)




  5. #2775
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    Quote Originally Posted by tomi View Post
    My thoughts on money sorta go in the opposite direction. Every dollar has a job - it just might not be right now. I try to get our bank account built up so when we want something that is more expensive than our monthly income allows for we can just take it out of the bank. Like the new fridge and furniture. We had the money in the bank and we paid cash. But I also totally understand both sides of what you and brad are talking about. I would want to pour everything into getting the bills paid off and be debt free (hence my mission to pay off our mortgage asap) .............. but life can get pretty mundane and stressful without playtime too. I guess its all a balance, huh? Part of the money for the responsible adult things like debt reduction - and part for play time to maintain the sanity! The tricky part is deciding where the line is drawn between the two. Good luck with the decision making! I'm sure you 2 will come up with a way for both to be happy.
    Then, technically, based on the teachings of Dave Ramsey, it HAS a job... its job is savings for something fun in the future. We aren't to that point yet. Right now, our jobs consist of furlough, 4-walls, debt payoff. Having $2500 with no job is taxing for me. Maybe for now, its job will be "stored until we figure out what to do it with" - I'll move it to a savings account so it's safe.
    Primal since March 5, 2012
    SW: 221 | CW: 182 | LPW: 166 | UGW: 140 (80 lbs loss)




  6. #2776
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    Good plan! It has been named, at least for now: savings!
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    my motivation

  7. #2777
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    Did I seriously see a pic of Mark on a laptop??? Not something I ever expected to see - you know, with the whole get out and move message he conveys. I suppose everyone needs some computer time, though, right? Just seemed odd to 1. See him on a computer and 2. See him fully clothed. lol

    Online training today... gotta make myself a better government employee, so I'll be soaking up all the time I can doing some Army Management Staff College education. YAY! <sarcasm>

    I can't wait til I get adjusted to DST. Ever morning this week has been BRUTAL!!
    Primal since March 5, 2012
    SW: 221 | CW: 182 | LPW: 166 | UGW: 140 (80 lbs loss)




  8. #2778
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    Agreed on DST.

    Mark writes a lot about how awesome technology is, so I think it's important for him to show that you CAN sit on the computer and relax (resting is part of the primal tenants, I think?), while also begin svelte and awesome outside
    Journal on depression/anxiety
    Curing IBS-C with Vitamin C and magnesium citrate.

  9. #2779
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    He's pretty hunky isn't he??? I'd like to wake up to that every day! Only, on MY man, not mark.

    Hope the class is going well.
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    my motivation

  10. #2780
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    Primal Blueprint Expert Certification
    Eh, it's boring. It's an extensive review of military organization and structure... blah.

    I may have found a great job opportunity! It's at a local university in the Chief Diversity Office. Job duties are primarily project management, event coordination and strategic planning... what am I writing my thesis on??? Strategic planning...

    It would require a pay cut... even to top out at the max salary is a pay cut of about $3,000 a year. But the job only asks for a bachelor's degree, preferring a master's degree. If I already have a master's, maybe I can start out at the top and it won't be such a hit to us. I have asked my strategic planning professor (who doubles as a previous boss) for a letter of recommendation. I will ask another professor (he taught my strategic communication and decision making classes) for a letter as well. Then I will need one more reference. Plan to use another previous boss - the one from my last job where I would LOVE to still be at - but since it was a temporary job, I had to do what I had to do... The university I would be applying at has SOOOO many growth opportunities. I just hope that if I were to land the job, that I would be good at it. That I would finally grow up and learn the finer workings of the organization and not just use the job as a place to spend 8 hours of my day...

    Brad thinks the pay is low for someone with a master's degree, but like I told him... it'll open doors for other opportunities at higher pay scales, and technically, they're only asking for a bachelors.

    I will likely put in for it and see what happens.
    Primal since March 5, 2012
    SW: 221 | CW: 182 | LPW: 166 | UGW: 140 (80 lbs loss)




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