Show, then aid - Sabine page 215

[Sabine]

I almost snatched that liverwurst right off his plate! I have never had warmed liverwurst before: it smelled divine!

[Sabine]

I was hungry on and off yesterday. Smelling that great food made it a little harder, but I managed not to throw myself outside any of it. Instead, I expended my energies on a project, and sewed a bag with pockets for my personal-DVD player and all its accessories. Looks pretty snazzy!

Here's how yesterday went:

Up at 5:00(good sleep except for strange dreams at the end)

Water: 10 glasses
Walking: 60"
Pains: a few, but definitely better

Bed at 10:00

If I can cancel the doctor's appointment without penalty, I'm going to do so, because they pains were of lesser intensity and fewer in quantity over the weekend. My body is healing itself, or all it needed was the threat of a doctor's visit to step in line. Who knows? If I have to pay anyhow(less than 24 hours notice), I'll go in and see what they say, but say 'no' to any expensive tests. Unless I am struck by a crippling pain.

I guess I am just a worry wart.

My period started today(Surprise! A week early.) which makes the abdominal pains issue even muddier. Grrr. Bodies. They sure keep you guessing.

Went to bed last night planning what to eat this morning (sausages with mushrooms and eggs). Woke up feeling completely normal and unhungry, but I will jump on that hunger as soon as it rears its head. Remember me complaining once (well, maybe more than once) that one of the problems with not getting hungry as often, is that it is hard to have all the great types of meals you want? Well, count it double for if you are only going to be eating every other day! Tomorrow will be my fourth fasting day. (Kind of interested to hear what the doctor will think of how I 'rested' my system.)

Lunch today is while meeting my friends for our Money Goals Support Group Meeting at IKEA. So I will be bringing cream cheese, capers, dill, and chopped red onion and buying two packs of their lox. Yum! Honey asked me if I would be having any of their meatballs. I wouldn't mind eating horsemeat, but those puppies have breadcrumbs in them, and their gravy- no, no, no. Sad, because I love them. My Dad used to make Klopps(meatballs) in a cream gravy, so they push happy childhood memory buttons. Add mashed potatoes and lingonberry jam, and I would be in tasting heaven. But not body heaven, after a few hours.

Just got caught up on Pedidoc's journal last night, and concerned to hear the results of her tests. How do things happen so quickly? Well, that we know about. They're always happening, unseen, and only appear to come out of nowhere. Made me think even more strongly about continuing the alternate day eating, for possible body repair effects. A new kind of superstition or totem, I guess. If I just do THIS, I can avoid THAT. But what else is there to do? Throw yourself completely to the fates? No, thank you. The illusion of control is better.

I guess I am not in a Zen mood this morning.

[jenn26point2]

There is a person on the forum who irks me. Mostly for his opinions, but also because he is always changing his icon picture. Drives me bananas, because I always have to take a double-look to see whom I am dealing with. I also find it kind of creepy that someone who says they are a man, uses pictures of young females as his icon. Okay, maybe it is a 'thing', and I just don't understand it, but I still find it hinky. Well, this morning this person has as his icon a female smoking a cigarette. SMOKING!!! Are you f*****g kidding me?!?

Ugh.

On you can totally say that word.

Can I ask what Middlest's good news was? Accepted to college of choice? Scored an amazing scholarship? What happened??

I hope your pains continue to diminish. I wonder if it was at all related to TOM?

[Sabine]

On[ly] you can totally say that word.

Can I ask what Middlest's good news was? Accepted to college of choice? Scored an amazing scholarship? What happened??

I hope your pains continue to diminish. I wonder if it was at all related to TOM?

Thanks, Jenn. I guess that's the benefit of being a goody-two-shoes most of the time.

I don't like to put anything that can be too identifying for the kids and spouse, since they are not choosing what I write. But it is VERY GOOD.

It better not be a new peri-menopause symptom. I don't want to put up with this every month!

[Sabine]

Here was yesterday:

Up at 7:00

8:10 1 chicken sausage
4 mushrooms fried in bacon grease
Triclops
1/2 avocado

12:00 2oz farmers cheese
3.5oz lox
2 squares dark chocolate(5g)

4:30 3.5oz lox with
cream cheese, capers, dill, red onion

7:00 pork chop with
red pepper pesto
1C nomac and cheese(cauliflower+)
2 squares dark chocolate

Water: 10 glasses
Walking: 60"
Pain: very little until evening, then a new sharper twinge

Bed at 11:00

I forgot my special cream cheese mixture at home when I left for my meeting, so bought some cheese and dark chocolate to go with my IKEA lox. Still felt restrained. Had my Wonder Mix at home for a late afternoon snack. Not super hungry at the time, but I already had dinner planned for late, and didn't want to go THAT long between meals.

Made the Red Pepper Pesto from Mark's sauce book. Pretty tasty on pork.

I'm seeing a chiropractor for a consultation today. I thought I might get a different kind of view on what these pains were. I cancelled my doctor's appointment yesterday, since I was feeling so much better, but this is a no-cancel without penalty, I think, and since the appointment is very early in the morning, I can't really check ahead of time. PLUS, I got a new twinge last night. So...all things combined, I'm going. I think a chiropractor would tend to view fasting as a viable form of treatment, but perhaps that is just my stereotypes kicking in. Blather, blather, blather.

Honey received the bad news that his contract will be ending in April. More stress. But what can you do? He's going to start looking for a job. I'm doing a craft fair in April, and I will hope for a nice chunk of sales. And we will just try to save every penny we can until then. But shoot, things were starting to feel normal again.

Maybe my angel came last week to let me know that we will make it through this just fine.

[Sabine]

...about the chiropractor visit. I want to keep an open mind, because after all, I VIVIDLY remember saying, 'oh, I could NEVER give up pasta.'

But I have also come to have more confidence in things I have learned about my body.

The chiropractor believes in the Eat for Your Bloodtype method. (I personally think it is quackery, but, hey, I may be wrong.) She tested me by muscle resistance(which I sort of believe in).

Here are her recommendations:
Okay to eat:
fish, turkey, pork
eggs
corn, soy
Greek yogurt twice per week
rice, beans, lentils
nuts
pasta, veggies, fruit

Not okay:
chicken, beef
whole wheat
cheese and milk
potatoes

I should limit myself to 30 grams of protein! That's per day, not per meal.

Oh, and take these supplements(about $120 per month).

Hmm.

Also, she pressed very hard on various parts of my abdomen, which hurt. Okay, okay, that was not her fault, but I sure didn't like it.

Maybe those supps would be good, but I am not going to spend $120/mo. Uh-uh. Well, not right off the bat, at least.

Now, I tried a chiropractor because I wanted something a little different, but maybe this was too different. I am going to think about her suggestions. Certainly it would not be hard to avoid beef, chicken, and dairy for a month. I am not going to add corn, soy, pasta, beans, or lentils to my diet, but she said I don't have to have everything I am ALLOWED to have. 30 grams of protein seems VERY low to me. Even lower than WHO recommendations. But she pointed to the area that first started to give me this problem, and said 'that's where you metabolize protein,' so, hmmm.

I decided to make an appointment with my doctor for Friday. A few days to think, and then another opinion. I am going to continue my alternate day fasting. I asked her opinion of fasting, and she said she wasn't a fan because people got so hungry. But (at this moment) I am not doing it for weight loss, but for health. So what if I get hungry? Suck it up, woman, you're trying to heal yourself. Also, the hunger is not really so bad. I think I am definitely at the True Hunger stage. I get hungry, notice it, ignore it, and it goes away to try again later it. It is not that 'feed me now, I need something, something, anything, oh how about pizza' kind of hunger that seems more driven by emotions and out-of-control blood sugar.

She also suggested I should be mostly vegetarian. Again, I'll try and think about it, but my immediate reaction was 'Oh, no, not going to happen. That's one of the things that started me on this downward spiral, years ago.

Oh, the difficulties of being open-minded. I am hoping that by admitting my biases, I won't be trapped by them.

Hahahahahaha-ha! (I know.)

Also, a little too much reliance on anecdotal evidence to make her case for my taste. Now, anecdotes are fine when they are about ME (n=1) but someone else's experiences are not necessarily valid for ME. Give me the average of a thousand people as a starting point, not one other person, who may or may not be anything like me.

So, tasks for the next few days:
Keep on with the alternate day fasting.
Try seafood and pork for my protein sources, and maybe keep it low.
Remember- you are under a LOT of stress. Try to be calm, and don't let your anxiety about money, jobs, teenagers affect how you are thinking about your body.
Take deep breaths, and trust in God.

(Okay, I don't often pull God into the discussion on my journal, so you know I must be wiggin'!)

Just realized she did not mention anything about fats. Okay, I'll cut the butter, since it is (kind of) dairy. No cream, though, hmm, might have to make some Coco-chocs.

See, there's a silver lining to everything!

[Pebbles67]

I think you need a second opinion. My chiro is Paleo.

[Sabine]

The doctor I am going to see on Friday(she took over for my old doctor, who was an MD) is a naturopath, so I imagine her perspective will be different from what I used to get("You want to lose weight? Here's a sheet with a balanced diet of 1,200 calories per day. Eat plenty of whole grains. Go to it.')

[RMS123]

Huh. Interesting. I just posted an "oxidizer" test in my journal. Interesting enough, the results are pretty consistent with what I've teased out recently.

[jenn26point2]

My doctor is paleo too. So are both of my chiropractors (well, one is paleo, the other is primal). A naturopath will likely provide you with answers that fit the paleo/primal framework than your chiropractor did.