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Thread: Show, then aid - Sabine page 111

  1. #1101
    Sabine's Avatar
    Sabine is offline Senior Member
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    Primal Fuel
    Second go round of heart last night, but now it is gone.

    Porkchops tonight.

  2. #1102
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    I was always confused about that comma.
    Some teachers wanted it. Some didn't.
    "Be careful what you pretend to be because you are what you pretend to be." Kurt Vonnegut
    "I love deadlines. I like the whooshing sound they make as they fly by." Douglas Adams
    "Moderation sucks." Suse
    "Wine is a vegetable." Meaty
    "Every decision you make, from what you eat to what you do with your time tonight, turns you into who you are tomorrow and the day after that." Cmdr Chris Hadfield


    Winencandy

  3. #1103
    Sabine's Avatar
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    Okay, pulling myself together

    I had the faintest whispers of heartburn last night. I choose to take it as my body's early warning system. Time to correct course before anything worse comes.

    So this morning I had a whomping protein and fat breakfast. I'm starting a crockpot of bone broth. I am planning on snacking as much as I want to today, but all on meat and fat.

    Meat and fat.

    Meat and fat.

    That's my mantra today.

    First up: ground beef fried with sliced onions(okay, a little carbohydrates, but really, onions, how can I resist?) topped with grated cheese and avocado. I am already looking forward to it.

  4. #1104
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    Stupid sugar cravings

    I know very well, why I am feeling this way.

    I understand that if I tough it out, I will be feeling much better by tomorrow, and completely different by the day after.

    I've had the scare of poor health to motivate me.

    There is plenty of good protein and fat in the house.

    Yet I am still pacing, unable to settle, desperately wanting to stuff things in my face.

    Not good things.

    Bread. Cookies. PBJ. Spaghetti with marinara. Waffles. (We only have one of these even in the house, but I still want them.)

    No wonder it is so hard. The inside of my body is conspiring against me. It has been duped by sugar, and is now a willing accomplice in trying to get me to have just a little. And a little more. And heck, why not the whole box? If I didn't know it was blood sugar MESSING WITH ME, I would just think I am a weak-willed glutton.

    It is like fighting against the urge to pee. There is only so much mind over matter before something has to give.

    I'm starting to think that maybe dieters are titans among men.

    This is horrible.

    But I am still doing it.

    Liverwurst. Heart broth.

    Hang in there.

    Cream next, I think.

  5. #1105
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    Sorry about hubby losing his job. I hope he finds a new one soon. I can't even imagine the stress you're feeling. And here I'm complaining about trying to correct our overspending and you're simply trying to survive. All things in perspective, I suppose. Anyhow, I hope some employment comes his way very soon.
    Primal since March 5, 2012
    SW: 221 | CW: 182 | LPW: 166 | UGW: 140 (80 lbs loss)




  6. #1106
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    Flights of fancy

    Thanks, Jenn. There have been some encouraging interviews, so we are hopeful. But trying not to be TOO hopeful, you know? Just the right amount.

    I made it through yesterday, with only an accidental cherry tomato ingestion (I think about 10). Was getting the bowl for Middlest and started eating before I even realized it. But once I did, I put the last two in my hand back. Amazing!

    Today should be better, in terms of cravings. The bone broth has been bubbling away all night. I'm going to let it go another day, but I might sneak a bowlful out, for snacking. My Honey glanced at it yesterday and asked, "What IS that on top?" Well, it was chicken feet, and the girls flipped out when they heard it. I told them they have been having broth made with chicken feet for months now. It did NOT reassure them. The feet do look rather pathetic. They plump up as they simmer, and look like little hands, beseeching for rescue. (What am I doing? Now I'M not going to want to eat it!) Just like eating things with faces, I think the trick is not to look much, or think about it. (Or imagine rescue pleas.)

    One more porkchop for eating today, and some lamb chops I found yesterday. Yay for the half-price bin at my grocery. I love it. We found a tri-tip last week, and froze it for our Labor Day activities.

    So, I have been thinking about David's comment, about figuring out what we want to be in order to facilitate weight-loss. The first thing that popped into my head was the term 'Earth Mother'. I've known since I was young that I wanted to be a wife, a mother, a home-body. Right on the tail of that, was discovering I want to be a writer, tell stories, craft worlds. Well, writers can be any weight, right? Although looking around my writers' group, it is obvious most of us are overweight. After all, when one of the mantras is 'Butt in chair, hands on keyboard' exercise is not one of the things that pops into your mind. Still, there are a fit few.

    But Earth Mother. The images that come with that are round. I guess it is time to do some mental rewiring, and come up with an Earth Mother who is slender. Active, not passive. Wearing something besides a shapeless jumper dress.(Although it is very colorful. Purple, red, blue, and orange ikat stripes. And comfortable.) And isn't stirring a batch of cookie dough in the bowl perched on her hip.

    Since the kids were little, I would always say quite openly, 'Everything that lives, eventually must die.' So I'm sure I don't need to banish slaughter from my new Earth Mother image. I just need to find the touchy-feely aspect of it. Don't know what I'll rework the dress into, but couldn't my Earth Mother have a brace of rabbits slung over her shoulder instead of a bowl on her hip? And a lamb following behind her, happy to be pasture-fed? And dirt under her nails from digging?

    What does this Earth Mother look like? That's what I am working on now.

    I can keep the Birkenstocks and long hair, though.

  7. #1107
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    I've tried to convince my vege-junkitarian friend(s) that one can eat meat and be vehemently against cruelty - that while eating animals is inherently violent, it does not have to be cruel - and that all those cuddly lambs wouldn't exist at all if we didn't eat them. Is it so bad that they live quite good lives and then die quickly and hopefully painlessly, as they do on my local farmer's organic farm? As opposed to never being born? Or my poultry farmer's chickens and ducks, that are hatched because she orders them, and live truly magical but short lives - one summer - and do in fact die painlessly and are consumed in entirety.

    Of course I am preaching to the choir here. The trouble is the critics of meat can rely on soundbite statements and we have to launch into long explanations.
    My Primal Journal: http://www.marksdailyapple.com/forum/thread53052.html

    "Freedom from fear" could be said to sum up the whole philosophy of human rights. - Dag Hammarskjold

  8. #1108
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    Yes, it is the rare animal in the wild that does not end its existence by being food for another animal.
    I do think it is a mark of civilization to try and make our food animals' lives as comfortable as possible, and their deaths quick and easy.
    Hmmm, my Earth Mother can't really have a Grim Reaper scythe(no grains being gathered, here). Having a nice sharp knife strapped to my thigh doesn't throw off Earth Mother vibes to me, but maybe it should.
    Okay, don't know how I got to that image! Just wandering, I suppose.

  9. #1109
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    I love that you compare the desire for sugar with the urge to pee. That is exactly how I feel. Like it is inevitable that the pressure will eventually burst the dam.

    Earth Mother image...Have you ever seen the cartoon "Captain Planet". I love the character Gaia. She is beautiful, smart and tough.

    I hope a your husband has luck with the job hunt. My husband is also looking for full time work.
    Paula Primal since 9/24/2010
    "Our greatest foes, and whom we must chiefly combat, are within." Miguel de Cervantes

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    MFP username: MDAPebbles67

  10. #1110
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    Thank you, body

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    Slept in this morning then ate a hearty breakfast of fried ground beef, scrambled eggs, 1/2 onion, some cheese, salsa, and half an avocado. This was about 9:00.

    It is now 4:00 and I'm starting to feel hungry again.

    7 hours!

    I am so grateful that one day of good eating (okay, and an extreme amount of pacing and will power) is enough to reset me. I am feeling good. What a change from yesterday. No pacing, just getting things done and enjoying myself with relaxing.

    What will I be eating? A porkchop, greens , and maybe some coconut milk with protein powder to top things off.

    Pebbles- anything happening with the new nursing position for your husband? I know he applied about a week ago. Sometimes they take forever to even get back to you. It is so nerve-wracking.

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