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Thread: Gravyboat's Log, Stardate 59575.1 page 51

  1. #501
    Gravyboat's Avatar
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    I know it's nothing worth freaking out about too hardcore because in 6 months or so a lot of that fat will be gone. And I'm already walking the path, so it's pretty much just a matter of time.

    But ugghghhghgghhhhgggh. I'm just feeling a lot of sudden shame that I've been out walking down the street like a hot-shit badass lately, never knowing of the rolls that lie beneath. Now I'm wondering if all those stares on the street have actually been because I'm a fucking troll and didn't know.
    Last edited by Gravyboat; 07-18-2012 at 03:30 PM.

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  2. #502
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    *looks at photos*

    Yeah, nope, not a troll. Not even a half-troll.
    “If I didn't define myself for myself, I would be crunched into other people's fantasies for me and eaten alive.” --Audre Lorde

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  3. #503
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    What about half-orc?

    Hey baby, my base land speed is 30 feet.

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  4. #504
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    Mmmm, not sure on the half-orc, but you can definitely play a barbarian and ragesmash shit if you want. I find that's a handy skill for a feminist to have.
    “If I didn't define myself for myself, I would be crunched into other people's fantasies for me and eaten alive.” --Audre Lorde

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  5. #505
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    Well hey. I've already got my hammer and I've got plenty of rage. Then I guess I should take Improved Initiative so I can go charge up and smash the shit out of catcallers on the street before they get a word out.

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  6. #506
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    Also, barbarians don't have to shave anything unless they damn well feel like it.
    “If I didn't define myself for myself, I would be crunched into other people's fantasies for me and eaten alive.” --Audre Lorde

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  7. #507
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    I bet they don't get all existential-crisis over their upper arm fat, either. Sounds like the character class for me.

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  8. #508
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    Omg the admin sent me a private message! I feel starstruck. <3

    Also: That shovelglove stuff is a ton of fun and a really good workout! It is so much less boring than standard lifting, and I feel so awesome whipping a giant hammer around in front of the giant mirror in my living room.

    I think when I lose all the weight and I'm stronger, I'd like to learn krav maga.

    Confession time: Living life as an invisible nonperson, I never gave much thought to self defense. I would take walks in the middle of the night by myself, passing strange men without a care in the world. I was not worried about being raped by a creepy stranger because who'd want to rape me? I was completely unconcerned about walking through "bad neighborhoods". Just keep your eyes straight ahead and look like you belong there, and it'll all be fine, said I. Don't show weakness and no one will bother you. And sure, that's all fine and dandy if you're a butch-looking fat girl. But with all the unprovoked attention now, and with getting physically smaller and thus "weaker-looking", I am quickly becoming a more enticing target, and I feel like I am entering a brand new world. A creepier, more threatening world.

    I mean, I knew that violence existed (duh), it's just that I was so invisible that I never felt at risk personally. I heard about women getting catcalled, but it didn't ever happen to me. Some dude would start talking to me at a bus stop, in a seedy neighborhood, after dark, when no one else was around, and I wouldn't be super worried about it. Guarded, sure, but not like "OMG is this man going to rape me at gunpoint??" I would expect, at worst, to be hounded for spare cash.

    I have been feeling a lot more anxious about male strangers lately than I ever have. I haven't even really wanted to go out lately because I am dreading receiving any more attention. I already told my friend I don't want to go to the flea market with her anymore, unless I can wear a burqa or something so no one can see me. I had no real idea until recently how emotionally exhausting it is to feel constantly on display and constantly judged and then to hear those judgments spoken aloud whether you want it or not. I knew in an intellectual sense, but not really.

    So anyway, I would be interested in taking krav maga classes to learn how to kick someone's ass if they threaten me. I would feel a lot safer in general knowing that I could take care of myself, now that I feel like I might need to.

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  9. #509
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    Actually, the only thing better I can think of than Krav Maga especially if you aren't carrying a gun or knife, is jiu-jitsu. Most struggles end up on the ground. It's better to be the one who knows something about grappling and fighting on the ground whether on your back or on top, and also knowing how to use leverage against a bigger, stronger opponent to make them regret attacking you by snapping a joint or choking them out with their own clothes.

  10. #510
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    I don't know a lot about jiu-jitsu. It just seems like more of a tournament style. Krav Maga, from what I understand, is about fighting fucking crazy and there are no rules against, say, kneeing someone in the balls and scratching their fucking eyes out. Sounds more real-life applicable.

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