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Thread: Primal Challenge Journal (MamaGrok) page 39

  1. #381
    Aila's Avatar
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    Hi MamaGrok!

    How are you doing? Hope you aren't busy beating yourself up over some hot wings and Larabars...

    BTW, you look postively waif-like in your photo...
    48 yo single mom
    5'2", goal weight 110lb/50kg
    Healing from a very well-intentioned (but disastrous) near lifelong vegetarianism...

    183.0 - CW FIFTY POUNDS RELEASED!
    233 - SW

    Aila's Primal Journey

    "If I cling to circumstances, I could claim to be not responsible. Only she who says she did not choose is the loser in the end." Adrienne Rich

  2. #382
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    Okay, okay, okay ... *grumbles and gets back into journal*

    The rest of last week went fine. Saturday night was a wedding and I had to decide whether I'd have a piece of cake or not. One of my biggest downfalls is high quality wedding cake. Well, the decision was made for me when we had to hit KFC for lunch on Saturday and I ordered half crispy and half "grilled" (chemically crap, do NOT recommend!). Ran ou tof the grilled and had a crispy staring at me and I could. not. stop. myself. LOVE the crispy. Anyway, I did exert moderation, but knew that I'd be eating that cake that night.

    And did. And then more. And the M&Ms that were favors (tons of them, which I didn't even like at first bite, but was mad I didn't like them anymore, lol, and ate them till they started tasting good). Repeat on Sunday. Then crawled out on Monday and IF'd till 1pm (didn't feel like eating) and had only PB&J to get me through sugar cravings that afternoon, then IF'd again yesterday (again didn't feel like eating) and ate a bunch of 24hr yogurt for dinner and little else, but no sugar and no fruit and no other dairy. Today I was dying for eggs, and ate my 3, then went home after an errand and ate 2 or 3 more. Yum.

    So I'm back to all real food, and stuck contemplating whether or not I'll add some whole fruit and some starchy veggies back. IDK; the butternut squash pudding is what started all this mess.

    147.5 :P
    5'4" 36yo mother to five sweeties & married to their AMAZING DaddyGrok
    Starting: 185 lbs (March '10)
    Current: 132.5 lbs
    Goal: 135 lbs (Hit Jan '13)
    Beating bingeing since 10/31/11 on my Leptin Reset journey

  3. #383
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    145.5 yesterday, 146 maybe today. Good food yesterday and today. I had fruit, butter, and some nuts (too many). I'll do a very restricted whole week, back to my total Lenten commitment again for the remainder till Easter.

    About the waif pic, lol - this is actually an old one, about 3 years old, that I submitted for an article on no 'poo. Before this most recent pregnancy, never in my life had I kept weight on my face after a baby was born. I still am not all the way back to the very lean, heart-shaped face I've always had, but yes, it was always very pale and very lean.
    5'4" 36yo mother to five sweeties & married to their AMAZING DaddyGrok
    Starting: 185 lbs (March '10)
    Current: 132.5 lbs
    Goal: 135 lbs (Hit Jan '13)
    Beating bingeing since 10/31/11 on my Leptin Reset journey

  4. #384
    Aila's Avatar
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    Hi Mama!

    Okay, Real Food! (Only a week more, eh?) Hey, most important is not to get too hung up and self-flagellating on M&Ms etc... Just back on the horse!

    Oh, funny re: your pic! I'm a no poo'er, too, for - hmm, not sure exactly, at least a couple of years now. Can't believe how many years I dealt with shampoo, conditioner, over and over. My hair, btw, I've always thought of as one of my best features, and now it is even more healthy and glorious.

    Lucky you that your face doesn't show weight, as a rule. I fear that my extra chin is going to hang around a while...

    Happy Week!
    48 yo single mom
    5'2", goal weight 110lb/50kg
    Healing from a very well-intentioned (but disastrous) near lifelong vegetarianism...

    183.0 - CW FIFTY POUNDS RELEASED!
    233 - SW

    Aila's Primal Journey

    "If I cling to circumstances, I could claim to be not responsible. Only she who says she did not choose is the loser in the end." Adrienne Rich

  5. #385
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    Another blown day yesterday, majorly. But I'm back on board today and actually had energy. I started B12 back up yesterday (after a visitng 2 year old ate FIFTY of the last container - in case you ever need to know, B12 is water soluble and won't kill you, so sayeth Poison Control) and actually felt like ... JOGGING?!?! when dh & I went for a walk this evening. What?!?! I HATE jogging. I had on my Merrill barefoots; maybe the light foot feeling helped?
    Craziness.

    I jogged a bit, then walked, then a bit more - didn't want to be unable to walk tomorrow. Then sprinted onthe way home, almost full out, fastest I've run in ages, uphill.

    Yesterday was truly horrible - gobs and gobs of baked goods - but my b.s. was only 136 after an hour, and then I ate a normal dinner and it was back decent, can't remember what, after an hour. I took an epsom salt detox bath this morning and am ready for Holy Week - austere and prayerful, here we come!
    5'4" 36yo mother to five sweeties & married to their AMAZING DaddyGrok
    Starting: 185 lbs (March '10)
    Current: 132.5 lbs
    Goal: 135 lbs (Hit Jan '13)
    Beating bingeing since 10/31/11 on my Leptin Reset journey

  6. #386
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    Oh, I just saw myself in a picture someone took yesterday. I still have chin weight, grr. Not under, but around. I have a feeling I'mnot even going to recognize myself when it all comes off, b/c I'll be 5 years older. Very interesting, not the most cheery thought, lol!
    5'4" 36yo mother to five sweeties & married to their AMAZING DaddyGrok
    Starting: 185 lbs (March '10)
    Current: 132.5 lbs
    Goal: 135 lbs (Hit Jan '13)
    Beating bingeing since 10/31/11 on my Leptin Reset journey

  7. #387
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    Good day. Bloated after running out of HCl. Got good sun. Felt crazy in the evening waiting for dinner and ate a larabar. And a whole stick of butte.r Hrmmm...
    5'4" 36yo mother to five sweeties & married to their AMAZING DaddyGrok
    Starting: 185 lbs (March '10)
    Current: 132.5 lbs
    Goal: 135 lbs (Hit Jan '13)
    Beating bingeing since 10/31/11 on my Leptin Reset journey

  8. #388
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    Going to be very, very honest here ... stepped on the scale this morning ... 150! YIKES?!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I know it's not 5lbs of true weight gain in less than a week, but what IS that?! Three weekends of binges, with the weeks in between being full primal, but high in fruits & doing some nuts and fermented dairy. My fasting BS is at 83-87 now, was 57 before. Is it sugar -> insulin circulating -> fat storage, or (my understanding of) what Stabby's saying, bad oils -> inflammation -> insulin resistance -> fat storage or something else?

    Whatever, I'm done with it. I still don't know where my carb balance is going to be, but I'm clearly not continuing down this path!

    Out of HCl
    Food
    B - 5 eggs in CO, greens
    1hr postprandial: 81

    L - roast beef, bit more eggs.

    S - leftover "Italian stirfry" (this was my euphemism for spaghetti w/ lots of veggies but no noodles last night). The instant it touched my mouth, the roof got a raised rash on the left side. This happened a few months ago, but I don't know what the culprit was. Must keep an eye on that. The raised sore spot is almost gone now. FTR, some spicy gourmet marinara, sausage, ground beef, three colors of sweet bell peppers.

    D - roast chicken w/ lots of skin, brussels sprouts & cauliflower sauteed in lots of butter

    Avoid Poisons & Trauma
    yes, well except for the rash I suppose!

    Move Slowly, Lift Heavy Things, Sprint
    no, no, no

    Sleep, Sun, Play, and Use Your Brain
    6hrs of sleep, but feeling strangely fine. Homeschooled on the deck - sun + brain. no play.

    no HCl, 1 (5000?) B12, 8000 IU D

    DaddyGrok said he was bloated last night, gained four pounds, but it was gone by morning. Very interesting, since he rarely gets bloated and I clearly gained four pounds in four days (I assume mostly yesterday), although mine wasn't gone by morning. Vry, very weird. Tomatoes?

    Quite bloated tonight.
    Last edited by MamaGrok; 04-20-2011 at 11:46 AM.
    5'4" 36yo mother to five sweeties & married to their AMAZING DaddyGrok
    Starting: 185 lbs (March '10)
    Current: 132.5 lbs
    Goal: 135 lbs (Hit Jan '13)
    Beating bingeing since 10/31/11 on my Leptin Reset journey

  9. #389
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    I should add that my pants are falling off. So the weight isn't fat on my lower half, at least - these pants are looser than last week, I think.
    5'4" 36yo mother to five sweeties & married to their AMAZING DaddyGrok
    Starting: 185 lbs (March '10)
    Current: 132.5 lbs
    Goal: 135 lbs (Hit Jan '13)
    Beating bingeing since 10/31/11 on my Leptin Reset journey

  10. #390
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    Food
    B - 3 eggs in CO

    L - roast beef, ridiculous quantity of dried fruit, some nuts. dizzy, etc. A little yogurt.
    Over an hour after starting, but less than 15m after finishing, b.s. was 140.

    S - ridiculousquantityofdriedfruit++
    right after, b.s. was 137. 1.5hr later, b.s. was 187. 0_o
    Got that mouth rash again - hard palate, raised, slightly sore, slightly numb, slightly odd tart or metallic taste, left side, while eating, took a few hours to subside completely.

    D - stewed rabbit, mashed cauliflower.
    1.5hr later, 108. Head still not totally settled from earlier fruit binge, but certainly better.

    Avoid Poisons & Trauma
    Nerp.

    Move Slowly, Lift Heavy Things, Sprint
    no, no, no.

    Sleep, Sun, Play, and Use Your Brain
    9hrs sleep, sleepy. no, no, no

    no HCl, 1 5000mcg B12, 6000 IU D

    It seems I have at least two states:
    1) even apples are too sweet, brussels sprouts taste sweet, any little bit of fruit makes me dizzy.
    2) Larabars are no longer sweet, need harder-core fixes, can tolerate quite a bit of sweet foods without feeling dizzy.

    Okay, neither of these is a good place for me. Hmm.
    Last edited by MamaGrok; 04-21-2011 at 11:58 AM.
    5'4" 36yo mother to five sweeties & married to their AMAZING DaddyGrok
    Starting: 185 lbs (March '10)
    Current: 132.5 lbs
    Goal: 135 lbs (Hit Jan '13)
    Beating bingeing since 10/31/11 on my Leptin Reset journey

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