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Thread: Primal Challenge Journal (MamaGrok) page 136

  1. #1351
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    1 day post-treatment, I realized I had the first eye twitch since (I think) the first day of treatment. Didn't come back yesterday, and didn't last long. Dunno what's up there, b/c the eye twitch was driving me NUTS for like a month pre-Tx.

    Same day, I noticed that my right eye had a dark line tracing the under-eye circle, almost bad enough to look like a recovering black eye, and the left eye didn't. Weird.

    Day 1 post-tx, I had AM energy, but extreme sleepiness all PM.
    Day 2 post-tx, I had no energy, but less sleepiness most of the day ... but still very, very sleepy late PM. Tried to nap, but couldn't, but still couldn't get out of bed after my skype with Dr. D (which I did sitting on the bed).

    Slept 10.5, 9.5+, 10.5 hrs in the three days since Tx. Hopefully I'll catch up on sleep soon!

    My gut could be flattened for the first 2 days, but not as well this morning. I ate coconut-ginger mussels, sea scallops, butternut squash w/ butter, brisket w/ (no gluten) au jus, a bit of mashed potatoes (hmm, that one gives my stomach a trace of giddiness to think about, but it might be a flutter of guilt, since I'm not sure what veg carbs are "safe" for me right now, and which aren't), beets & carrots, brussels sprouts, all at a restaurant. All was allegedly GF, DF (except butter), and no sweeteners.

    L even better. (CD6)

    I felt fairly blase' toward the sweet stuff on the menu. Nice feeling.

    I'm going to try a format the next month that will help me keep track of stuff for DrD even while I'm on the road next week.

    Face less puffy today, nose not really puffy (but a bit pink), face still fairly round. (My face is naturally heart shaped.)
    Last edited by MamaGrok; 01-18-2014 at 07:51 AM.
    5'4" 36yo mother to five sweeties & married to their AMAZING DaddyGrok
    Starting: 185 lbs (March '10)
    Current: 132.5 lbs
    Goal: 135 lbs (Hit Jan '13)
    Beating bingeing since 10/31/11 on my Leptin Reset journey

  2. #1352
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    AM Energy: 4
    AM Mood: 5 (was able to try on ski clothes w/o utter discouragement that I can't wear half of them & have to buy more)
    B: 3oz ground beef, 3 eggs, 1T butter
    Noon Energy: 4
    PM Mood: 4 - "present"
    L: 3oz roast beef, 2T guacamole, "mousse" of 1 can coco cream, 2T cocoa powder, and 1 banana
    D: Jason's Deli salad (avoiding wheat, dairy, sweeteners). Tiny bit of nuts. Pineapple spear, happy to stop at one instead of eating the whole container as usual
    PM Energy: 3 (very sleepy by 8:30)
    PM Mood: 4

    Insert cravings, odd feelings, comments where appropriate.



    TEMPLATE
    AM Energy:
    AM Mood:
    B:
    Noon Energy:
    PM Mood:
    L:
    D:
    PM Energy:
    PM Mood:

    Insert cravings, odd feelings, comments where appropriate.
    Last edited by MamaGrok; 01-18-2014 at 05:56 PM.
    5'4" 36yo mother to five sweeties & married to their AMAZING DaddyGrok
    Starting: 185 lbs (March '10)
    Current: 132.5 lbs
    Goal: 135 lbs (Hit Jan '13)
    Beating bingeing since 10/31/11 on my Leptin Reset journey

  3. #1353
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    AM Energy: 4
    AM Mood: 4
    B: 3oz grd bf, 3 eggs, 1T butter
    Noon Energy: 4. Getting very sleepy around 3:30, and drained thinking of all that will be needed from me at m y friend's mother's funeral tonight
    PM Mood: 3 (drained after keeping Booger still during Mass)
    L: 3oz rst bf, 1-2T guac, 1 big pineapple spear
    D: salsa pork (dunno if there was omething else in it), salsa, salad, avocado
    PM Energy:4
    PM Mood:5

    Something has brought bloating back. Three days of restaurants, I guess, but I really did my best to choose well. I don't think I'll ever stay unbloated so long as I don't make every single bite I eat. And as I recall, even doing that was no guarantee.
    Last edited by MamaGrok; 01-20-2014 at 03:09 PM.
    5'4" 36yo mother to five sweeties & married to their AMAZING DaddyGrok
    Starting: 185 lbs (March '10)
    Current: 132.5 lbs
    Goal: 135 lbs (Hit Jan '13)
    Beating bingeing since 10/31/11 on my Leptin Reset journey

  4. #1354
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    AM Energy: 4
    AM Mood: 4
    B: (noon)leftover salsa pork & veggies
    Noon Energy: 4
    PM Mood: 5 - smiling while teaching school for the first time in many months
    L: 1 jar coco kefir, 1T cocoa powder, 1 banana
    D: pork chop, salad, sauteed veggies
    PM Energy: 4+
    PM Mood: 5+

    I really am not craving anymore. Not even tart fruit. Praise God.

    It took me a long time to get up and go do school, but once I started, I enjoyed it. Again I'm putting off finishing it, b/c I don't relish the thought of the battle it will take to get my borderline ODD son started with me.

    This is the first time I've ever given up sugar and not lost a ton of at least water weight in the first two weeks. Even the 2-4lb I lost over the 10 days in treatment are gone now, which makes little sense, since I'm not even remotely overeating and the bloating didn't disappear till near the end, and it's the only thing that's back, plus my measurements on mid-lower body are down.

    I wish it would start falling off (not that it ever has). I can't fit in my ski clothes.
    Last edited by MamaGrok; 01-20-2014 at 07:28 PM.
    5'4" 36yo mother to five sweeties & married to their AMAZING DaddyGrok
    Starting: 185 lbs (March '10)
    Current: 132.5 lbs
    Goal: 135 lbs (Hit Jan '13)
    Beating bingeing since 10/31/11 on my Leptin Reset journey

  5. #1355
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    AM Energy: 4**
    AM Mood: 5
    B: 3oz grd beef, 3eggs, 1T butter
    Noon Energy: 4
    Noon Mood: 5
    L: 4ish oz grd bf, 1T olive oil, cinnamon, carrot, apple
    D:
    PM Energy:
    PM Mood:

    **Took close to an hour to get to sleep. I felt a little mind-spinny, but it was mostly physical. Little itches here and there, and a strange feeling like something scratchy was progressing up my throat and through to my ears. Don't wanna think about what that could have been! I resolved to take a detox bath in the morning, and did (4C baking soda). I had lots of dreams and lots of little wakenings all night, and finally got out of bed after (I think) 9.5hrs sleep).

    Is the reason that cravings have gotten better (and other things continued to improve) every day since I finished treatment that it finally gave the oral AA's a chance at working (taking me closer to the top of the pit)?

    2pm and I'm sleepy.
    5'4" 36yo mother to five sweeties & married to their AMAZING DaddyGrok
    Starting: 185 lbs (March '10)
    Current: 132.5 lbs
    Goal: 135 lbs (Hit Jan '13)
    Beating bingeing since 10/31/11 on my Leptin Reset journey

  6. #1356
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    AM Energy: 5
    AM Mood: 5+
    B: 3oz grd bf, 3eggs, 1Tbutter
    Noon Energy: 4+
    Noon Mood: 5
    L: 5pm - avocado, roast beef, pineapple spears (a tiny bit compulsive/giddy), sweet potato w/ butter & cinnamon
    D:
    PM Energy: 4-
    PM Mood: 4

    Today's interesting fact: Every January 22, I play trumpet for a silent march remembering the women and children impacted by Roe v Wade. The last few years, no matter how simple I keep my participation (I skip the Mass, the lunch, and most of the talks now), I am utterly drained when done, even though all I do is walk about a mile, play a few minutes, then leave.

    Today, I was not drained. I was fine, I was cheerful, I was not having problems dealing with people who made decisions I strongly opposed.

    Then I got pulled over on the way home, nearly ran out of gas, and was made very late to my son's dr appt. That's when I got drained. But it took all that, and even then, I wasn't yelling and ballistic. I was able to see v ery objectively the stresses piling up on me, realize that I was feeling very stressed, and make jokes about how suddenly I hated everything around me.

    That's a tremendous improvement.

    I got home, vegetated for an hour and a half, and I'm recovered pretty well. The kids started fighting, and after a brief yell, I was able to apologize to them quickly and talk to them, even while doling out appropriate consequences.

    I do still feel how I instantly feel tense when someone starts crying unreasonably, fighting, or yelling.

    Overall, I'm very encouraged by how the stresses of today played out.
    5'4" 36yo mother to five sweeties & married to their AMAZING DaddyGrok
    Starting: 185 lbs (March '10)
    Current: 132.5 lbs
    Goal: 135 lbs (Hit Jan '13)
    Beating bingeing since 10/31/11 on my Leptin Reset journey

  7. #1357
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    AM Energy: 4-
    AM Mood: 4- (distinctly down from yesterday)
    B: grd bf, ssg, butter
    Noon Energy: ?
    Noon Mood: ?
    L: rst bf, guac, pineapple spear
    Snack: 1.5C Fage whole, 1/8C cashews. First dairy in 2.5 weeks. Dying to eat protein, but long time till dinner could be ready
    D: No appetite. Grumpy as heck. Pork chop, bits of greens till it nearly made me puke, more salad
    PM Energy: 4
    PM Mood: 3-

    I just found myself saying and thinking two things I haven't said or thought in a long while. 1 - Stop fighting; you're giving me a headache. 2 - Don't want to do anything, just want to sit here and do nothing, hate the world.

    God, please don't let it be the dairy. It's so freaking hard to be vigilant about dairy.
    Last edited by MamaGrok; 01-23-2014 at 06:21 PM.
    5'4" 36yo mother to five sweeties & married to their AMAZING DaddyGrok
    Starting: 185 lbs (March '10)
    Current: 132.5 lbs
    Goal: 135 lbs (Hit Jan '13)
    Beating bingeing since 10/31/11 on my Leptin Reset journey

  8. #1358
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    Haven't been on here in awhile but wanted to check in on you after you popped into my head as I"m dealing with FODmaps or something. I am so sorry to see the huge struggle you have been having!! I will be praying for you and hope things start looking up soon!

  9. #1359
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    Hope you get the FODMAPs question worked out! Things are definitely looking up since my clinical treatment for sugar addiction.

    Last week I was skiing. So the highlights from that are:
    *No trouble avoiding overt sweets. Had some trouble avoiding covert towards the end of the week primarily because of lack of food options.
    *"Forgot" that my doc & I both concluded (him through muscle testing) that corn is an "absolutely no" for me, and had cornbread the 2nd-to-last day. Ate it somewhat compulsively, but was able to shut it off reasonable. Not sure if that is what led to tart concentrated fruit cravings that evening and the next afternoon, or if a subtle rise in minor cravings led to the "forgetting" in the first place. Major bloating with the corn.
    *No cravings trouble since then, but feel my baseline level of cravings is just slightly higher than "none."
    *Twice had free desserts at restaurants given to me, one was for my birthday and the other was because of a chef mess-up and included my three very favorite desserts prepared extremely well, and I just didn't care. My first thought was, "That will wreck my life," not, "That looks SO good." (Although as I tell this story, I'm having a slightly weird feeling in my gut, but it might be b/c I'm in the clinic chair getting my booster treatment, which makes my whole body feel weird!)
    *Felt more scared and timid on the slopes than ever before. Had more leg and lung exhaustion than ever before. I've skiied at this weight and lack of fitness before without anything like this.
    *No headaches all week, only one or two slight mood reversals and mornings were hard to get going and start enjoying the skiing. Since I"ve been home, I've already had one or two headaches.
    *Skin went super soft, then not, now super soft again since last night.
    *Had a decent amount of cheese & sour cream without any obvious side effects. Had dig enz and/or HCl every (or nearly every) time.
    *Ate a lot, as I usually do skiing, but usually I lose weight doing it. This time I gained 3-4lb that are now back off. Still no net loss since starting treatment, or at most, 2lb in 1 month.

    2 days till I can get my 30 day chip, and it has been almost entirely effort-free.
    5'4" 36yo mother to five sweeties & married to their AMAZING DaddyGrok
    Starting: 185 lbs (March '10)
    Current: 132.5 lbs
    Goal: 135 lbs (Hit Jan '13)
    Beating bingeing since 10/31/11 on my Leptin Reset journey

  10. #1360
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    For yesterday

    AM Energy: 3.5

    AM Mood: 2. Went ballistic with headache and intolerance of disobedience. Couldn't stop yelling.
    B:grd bf & ssg
    Noon Energy:
    Noon Mood:
    L: cant remember
    D:beef jerky at 4:30 (had to eat), then ppork chopp + carrots & shrooms at 7:30
    PM Energy: 3.5
    PM Mood:5

    For today

    Busy dreams all night, wasn't sure I'd be able to get to sleep just before bed, when I was hit with the old no-L nausea & felt like my mind was freezing with the feeling of being overwhelmed with my tasks & burdens, but I got to sleep quickly, although the last hour I kept waking, afraid I'd miss getting up for my booster this morning.

    AM Energy: 4.5
    AM Mood: 4
    B: 3 eggs in 1+T butter, 2-3 oz elk & bison steak
    Noon Energy:
    PM Mood:
    L:
    D:
    PM Energy:
    PM Mood:
    5'4" 36yo mother to five sweeties & married to their AMAZING DaddyGrok
    Starting: 185 lbs (March '10)
    Current: 132.5 lbs
    Goal: 135 lbs (Hit Jan '13)
    Beating bingeing since 10/31/11 on my Leptin Reset journey

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