Back to topic, I don't think most women want a feminine man anymore than most men want a woman who looks like she'll snap in half easier than a toothpick. But I think some women don't understand that the first step to getting a male to "man up" is to stop trying to cut his nuts off every chance she gets.
This has been a long thread, so excuse me if I don't quote right, but I think Rita said something about her man being in charge? Well, I tend to think if more women had that attitude, then more men would act like... men. Treat a man LIKE a man, and he'll act like one.
break up with your partner first. Be an adult; take responsibility for your actions instead of blaming them on your interpretation of someone else's.
The cheat scenarios I gave of a woman putting out and a woman withholding each have the same ingredient and outcome - apples to apples. Any perceived differences are in the motivation of the cheater who should be held responsible for their actions, just like anyone else. Being married to a frigid bitch is not an excuse. Staying married to a frigid bitch isn't either. Sure, one has a better explanation for why they cheated, but it still doesn't excuse or validate it. On this, we will continue to disagree - sadly, there are many who blame themselves for their partners infidelity regardless of the cheater's reasons/excuses/explanations because of thinking as you have. Everyone has responsibility in a relationship, and I'm not absolving one for the other, but they can certainly own their actions. I do not believe in blaming the victim.
I'll agree with you about how hard it is to be starved for something you crave (although didn't make comment about working things out). If a person is locked into a situation where they get nothing from someone (their wife), and suddenly someone comes along who is giving them something (attention, respect, etc.), it's very, very difficult, and some say impossible, for them to ignore it. Wandering a desert while dying of thirst and stumbling upon cool water...
If they want to be a masculine manly man about it (let's just go with 'responsible adult'), we can hope they know themselves well enough to recognize the slippery slope they're stepping onto and will get out of their current relationship before starting another one.