She-Groks Only.......... cuz it works different for us page 64

[tomi]

Tomi, I'm still in the midst of the big M, so maybe I'll change my tune in a year or two.

I was okay until I hit my 2 year post last period mark - and then its like all my desire to be intimate was GONE! It was really hard when I realized that part of me was just gone. I cried - and I had to find a way to explain it to my husband because he felt rejected and didn't know how to deal with that. I'm still trying to come to terms with it all. I've tried taking various "herbal" stuff. I was taking fenegreek because I had read that it was good for the libido --- didn't do anything for me. I've spent the big dollars on the "big bang" magic potions that you can buy in the condom section of the store! They don't much. They especially don't do anything to get the motor started. And my doctor suggesting I read "erotica" doesn't help. Is that like Harlequin Romances --- or Penthouse? Either way - no thank you. Seems the only time I'm "in the mood" is after I've had a couple rum and diet cokes. (Which is good incentive for the hubby to like to have it in the house). Oh well -- what can I do? Maybe taking off the weight will help with the mental blocks --- the physiological issues are a mystery.

@sphikes --- hysterectomy can reduce sexual pleasure. Things just aren't there to do their thing anymore. But, it doesn't have to be all about the BIG O. There is LOTS more to love making than just the finish. At least - thats what I read. My husband still thinks its all about the BIG O!

Oh - isn't life interesting.

[sbhikes]

Yeah I can tell that there are organs that used to move around in there that aren't moving around anymore. The Big O is so short in duration now. Not that it's a huge issue. I really wish that touching me didn't always lead to that, you know? Why can't anyone touch me without wanting sex from me?

[tomi]

Yeah I can tell that there are organs that used to move around in there that aren't moving around anymore. The Big O is so short in duration now. Not that it's a huge issue. I really wish that touching me didn't always lead to that, you know? Why can't anyone touch me without wanting sex from me?

most men don't know there is any other way to touch....... They're wired that way I guess. It stinks - but it is what it is. Once you're married its a little easier to get them to think differently - but its still their main goal. I've been married 10 years and my husband still thinks I respond to touch the same way he does. Even after I've told him a thousand times "I don't like it when you grab there!" ........... he'll do it again and again and again. Maybe he thinks I'll learn to like it. MEN! they are frustrating creatures!

[RitaRose]

I got lucky with my man. He already went through the "I need a hot young thing so I don't feel so old" stage before we met. He figured out pretty quickly that he and the "sweet young thang" had nothing in common, nothing to talk about, no common goals, hated each other's music, hated each other's friends, she thought he was boring, he thought she was flakey, and it just wasn't as great as he thought it would be.

Then I came along. Both of us middle-aged, neither one acts like it, and only 6 years apart. And it has been GREAT!

So... I guess he's already gone through menopause. No moodiness!

[sbhikes]

because then you would bemoan your lack of appeal and feel ugly

Is there an eye roll icon? Here's one: It doesn't look as irritated as I'd like it to.

[tomi]

I was ignoring that post........ what a dumb ass. Exactly why this is a thread for WOMEN!

[Pedidoc]

Well another week stuck at the same weight. I need to increase my activity levels. Let's face it anything is more than the couch potato I've become. Is anyone willing to join a 4 week excercise challenge? The goal is to move at least 30 minutes 5 x a week. You can lift heavy things, move slow for longer, have quick bursts, or just play, but I need to be held accountable and establish a healthy habit!

[tomi]

Monday morning........ a new week - with new choices. Here we go................

[fiercehunter]

Well wondering if I want to start dabbling around with the bioidentical estrogen again. Yeah I'm that kind of Grokette. I can see the hot flashes from here and I just don't wanna.

[tomi]

If you can get through them without the hormones, I say go for it. Its natural -- and although very annoying at times, isn't really all that bad. Course, I'm on the otherside of it all now. It went pretty easy for me. Some hot flashes - okay - 8 or 10 a day a times - and some night sweats. No emotional roller coaster stuff at all. But, if you need to, go for it. There's no shame in wanting to ease the effects of menopause a bit.

Good luck.......