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Thread: She-Groks Only.......... cuz it works different for us page 107

  1. #1061
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    For those commenting on Vitamin D: I had my levels checked last July and they were at 23 (very low!). I started supplementing sometime last fall at 10,000 IU per day for a few months. I don't think I dropped down to 8,000 IU until maybe February, then within the last couple of months, I've dropped down to 6,000 IU per day. My levels are now at 59, which is the highest recorded level I've ever had (since I remember my results from the age of 16, now 24). I'm going to keep supplementing at 5-6000 IU per day for the rest of the summer and re-test in fall, probably. I'll have to see what's a good level to keep my Seasonal Affective Disorder at bay over the winter (basically eradicated it last winter, so I think a level over 40 is good for me, but I don't know how much D to take to maintain that).
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  2. #1062
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    Quote Originally Posted by Leida View Post
    See, and that is exactly what bugs me. The idea that being attractive is unrealistic. Why is the desire to have the efforts put in the gym pay off as the fit reflection in the mirror to the level of shameful vanity or mental disease or something else abnormal? Are we accept the idea that time spent will net us abstract "better health", but shy away from the proof positive of it that you can see clear as day, as beautiful deltoid, trim waist and slender legs? I just fail to see what is so healthy about saggy thighs... If someone went to the Uni, and went through 3 years, and dropped out, and said it was good enough for them won't we all be thinking internally that it is weird to put all this time in, and walk out without the degree? Not to put a little bit more effort? Would we believe that the person really lacks brain-power to finish 8 more courses in Year 4? Obviously, you can't grow 5 inches taller, but losing 2 inches off the waistline shouldn't be impossible, no? Particularly when plenty others did it?
    My dear, I did not say that being attractive is unrealistic. I am saying that it is possible to be attractive without conforming to a very narrow definition of beauty. I will never have a wasp waist. It's genetic. I am the rectangular body type. So I accept it. Beating myself up over a large waist is as stupid as beating myself up for not being four inches taller. But my husband tells me quite happily about my beautiful legs, butt, and breasts, so you know what? I'm going to believe him. And accept that there are other kinds of beautiful besides willowy and elegant. I would love to be willowy and elegant, but I haven't got the raw materials. But there are other kinds of beautiful and I am one of them, even with my short neck, thick waist, and middle-aged skin (although I kind of lucked out there too. I don't wrinkle badly at all). You are also beautiful - I've seen your pictures - and I feel badly for you that you can't see it. There is nothing wrong with trying hard to be your best. But there is something very wrong with being miserable about where you are at.

    Kim, Tomi, Baker, thanks. Glad it struck a chord.

    And Kerry, stick with it. Do buy new clothes, or at least stop wearing the baggy ones. (But do save at least one outfit, so you can try it on every now and again to marvel at how much room there is in it.) And you will reach a point, quite suddenly, when everyone will see the difference. I think eventually our proportions change so that people start seeing us in a new category. When we are very overweight, it takes quite a while to get there. I am betting you are on the verge of hitting it. Be prepared. Everyone will let you know. And the good news is, you will change categories faster after that. I think it's probably mathematical, to tell you the truth, but I am way too lazy to try to figure it out. Something about the width to height ratio, and how the mind will round it off. When the ratio changes enough, people see you as an entirely different shape. I say that because almost everybody seems to notice at the same time, so there must be some kind of objective thing going on.
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  3. #1063
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    I perfectly accept that I cannot be willowy and elegant. But I also accept that I am over-fat, and need to work the fat off to show the muscle that I work so hard on putting on. Again, not someone else's body, but my own, minus the fat that I do not need, and that is not healthy. I am obviously not going to cut my ribs out, but what's the value of being proud of the muffin top? Where is wisdom in looking at the bulge at the outside of the thigh and being content with it sitting there for all to see?

    Why it is totally acceptable to work hard on increasing a number of plates you put on the barbell for deadlift, something that nobody will ever notice, but you get sent to a shrink every time you mention you are adding those plates in order to achieve visible improvements to the body not to merely lift more iron off the floor?


    In Ural mountains they used to send the potential brides to be running down the hill, and prized the women who didn't have the 'jiggle'.

    Ancient Greeks right before Perciles had so little food available, that their 60 y.o. people took poison at the family dinner in a farewell setting. They were completely blown away by how much Persians eat and by the notion of dessert, which was sweetmeats. Ancient Greeks, the epitome of athleticism as a nation in our whole Western civilization. Do you think Ancient Greek women norm was 25% BF?

    Romans considered being fat to be a failing of character.

    So, why do we have to hear of stupid Rubens and Titians? That's one short wave of fat being glorified by the art since paleo Venuses. I don't find their women beautiful at all. Nice hair color, but those waves of pearly-white fat on the massive buttocks... eww.
    Last edited by Leida; 06-26-2012 at 08:20 AM.
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  4. #1064
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    Leida, I hope you don't have any daughters who are subjected to your skewed and obsessed body focus.

    You do need help. When was the last time you went longer than a month without exercising, dieting or binging or calling yourself fat? Do you really see yourself? Really? Because when you've posted pictures here, I don't see this layer of fat you are talking about. You want to be 15% BF? You need drugs for that. If you think the average woman can achieve that without drugs and health complications, you are wrong.

    Seriously, give your mind and body a break.

  5. #1065
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    The belly roll, the bulge on the outer thigh, and the muffin top. It is very visible. I don't know if it is 15% or 18% that gets rid of that, but by pic comparison I am between 22-25% BF. Paula did not mention taking drugs. I see plenty of women who do not sport extra fat that I sport in the pool. Zoebird on this forms speculated that dropping to 17-18% BF is no biggie. i would take that if I could stay there, not ride back up every time I get close.

    Occam Razor says that all things being equal, the simplest explanation is the best. Yep, there is some genetic variation, but all and all, I figure those fit women are simply better than I am at not over-eating. My over-eating comes from the life-long addiction to sugar. Now, that's the real problem, not that I look at the mirror the wrong way.

    Every time I tried to 'just accept myself', I gained weight. In the past 2 months, I did not control my food intake, but ate clean. The result? 4 lbs gained and gearing up. That's the second time that happened. No external control - unstoppable weight gain. And I have had a rather scary glimpse to where that road ends. I have seen myself overweight. I see that photo in my mind. I am afraid of ever getting there again. It is so easy for me. I just don't have to do anything... give myself a break, you know.
    Last edited by Leida; 06-26-2012 at 09:02 AM.
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  6. #1066
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    But Leida, you ARE willowy and elegant. I thought what you were going for was to look like an olympic hurdler or something like that.

    I have to admit I really like those Dove ads. I look at all those women and even though some of them might be fatter than me, they have better shapes than me.

    Quote Originally Posted by Judg
    Something about the width to height ratio, and how the mind will round it off. When the ratio changes enough, people see you as an entirely different shape. I say that because almost everybody seems to notice at the same time, so there must be some kind of objective thing going on.
    That seems so true! The rounding off thing. That must explain why even though I haven't really gotten fatter I see a fatter person in the mirror lately. Something must have changed and is being rounded off in my brain.

    Sadly, nobody has noticed any of my weight loss. Nobody has said anything. Except for my boyfriend, no compliments, not even veiled so as not to seem un-PC (I work at a university so I'm sure there's a bit of PC around here). The closest anybody has come to saying anything has been to ask me if I was still on my low carb diet and have I seen any difference.
    Female, 5'3", 49, Starting weight: 163lbs. Current weight: 135 (more or less).
    Starting squat: 45lbs. Current squat: 180 x 2. Current Deadlift: 230 x 2

  7. #1067
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    Heh, no-no, willowy are those girls that were slender since childhood, naturally, the exomorphs type (?), the dancer-runner kind of thing, those who can have a few grapes and a toast and be good for the day. You know, the romantic looking ones. Building up the frame up top and losing fat around the middle and the bottom is my only recourse, with my heavy bone structure. The top is finally getting there, but the middle-bottom is a problem.

    Sadly, nobody has noticed any of my weight loss. Nobody has said anything. Except for my boyfriend, no compliments, not even veiled so as not to seem un-PC (I work at a university so I'm sure there's a bit of PC around here). The closest anybody has come to saying anything has been to ask me if I was still on my low carb diet and have I seen any difference.
    I never get any comments either, but in a way it is a better compliment. If the transformation is gradual and confident, it's probably less prone to compliments from outside, no?
    Last edited by Leida; 06-26-2012 at 09:14 AM.
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  8. #1068
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    Quote Originally Posted by Leida View Post
    Mirror image is just one of the categories. I will be happy with myself; I know exactly what I want, and it is not somebody elses' body. It is mine, minus the fat layer that is possible to remove. Other women did it. I should be able too.
    The problem with "the mirror image" is it is often tainted by the looker's perceptions, beliefs, psychology. Another issue impacting mirror image is the reality that many of the "ideal" images we see today are manipulated to appear perfect.

    I find it sad that:
    1. You will be happy, not you are happy with yourself.
    2. Being happy with yourself is so strongly tied to your body and seems to disregard WHO you are and what you DO/HAVE.
    3. You actually think you have fat layer and are constantly trying x,y,z hoping it will get you to the mirror image you seek. Never considering how your mirror image/perception might be tainted or that your hyper focus on the image may actually be detrimental to achieving your goals.

  9. #1069
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    Quote Originally Posted by namelesswonder View Post
    For those commenting on Vitamin D: I had my levels checked last July and they were at 23 (very low!). I started supplementing sometime last fall at 10,000 IU per day for a few months....).
    When the nurse called with my lab results, she said my Dr. wanteded me to take 2,000 for one month then 1,000 for one month. Doesn't seem to me that this would be an effective dose! I added more yesterday, probably a total of 8,000 IU and I had some terrible gastric issues...lol. I am thinking about starting a little lower today and increasing by 1,000 IU per day unil I am at 8,000 or so. My cod liver oil has a fair amount of D in it as well.

    I am interested as well in how we can maintain after reaching a healthy level. Surely, one would get to a point where you don't need daily mega doses!

  10. #1070
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    1. You will be happy, not you are happy with yourself.
    2. Being happy with yourself is so strongly tied to your body and seems to disregard WHO you are and what you DO/HAVE.
    3. You actually think you have fat layer and are constantly trying x,y,z hoping it will get you to the mirror image you seek. Never considering how your mirror image/perception might be tainted or that your hyper focus on the image may actually be detrimental to achieving your goals.
    1. If I got a C on the test, I would not be happy with myself, but i can foresee myself being happy with working hard and getting an A.
    2. No, this is hardly the place to discuss the overall life's level of achievement and interests beyond fat loss, paleo eating, play and fitness
    3. To arrive to one's destination, one has to know what the destination is. Stumbling around aimlessly hoping to come upon something you like... not me.
    My Journal: http://www.marksdailyapple.com/forum/thread57916.html
    When I let go of what I am, I become what I might be.

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