The Girl in White Tiger Field page 5

[tinawalker]

Interestin g....I had the same epiphany as you...and have in the past suffered from what is known as IBS....
You are on the right path.

I have dealt with the conflict of "eating animals"...and dealing with foods I preferred (everything non primal). Until I realized I preferred junk because I was raised on it...and am addicted to it. Very different from eating to live...to feel healthy and strong.

Good luck on your journey. I believe we are all on the right path!

[Byakko]

tinawalker: Yeah. My problem is my self control is on an all time low. Although I may not always remember, I have been able to do some things I thought I'd never be able to. So if I just try and put my mind to it and have more discipline and consideration for my health, maybe I can get there.

This primal/paleo way of eating made sense to me because the things I wanted most were probably bad for me. It's amazing how I've relapsed into eating things I haven't eaten in years. It's because I know I'm having to give up what I used to eat. I should stop whining and crying about what I can't have. What I can't have is bad for me anyway, so why am I so miserable? It's not like I have to live off things I don't like. I like fruit, I like vegetables, I like meat. So...yeah. I don't know where this forlorn attitude of mine has come from. I gotta refocus.

Ultimately I hope tomorrow is the first day of a new beginning. And I also hope that if I am successful my success can be inspiration for my family.

[Byakko]

First day of trying to be serious and I've failed already.

B: 4 small Mrs. Fields (breaded) fish sticks (mom had already prepared them and I was too lazy to cook something else and didn't want to be rude.) Then later I had a banana, thinking that the fish sticks would not fill me up.

Snack: 5 whole pecans

L: Left overs (chicken, kale, red peppers cooked in coconut oil)

Then I cheated with a cone of Bryer's chocolate and vanilla ice cream. Followed by two small Reese's candies. (My grandmother is like the witch from Hansel and Gretal. She keeps a huge stock pile of candy. I'm going to say right now that I tried to resist. But I felt very angry and agitated. I tried distracting myself with reading but it didn't work. I kept shaking. I ate a very generous sized portion lunch with water...so I know that I wasn't hungry. I craved. Still it didn't make it any easier.

D: I will probably have what's rest of the left overs I had for lunch. And maybe an apple or orange for dessert.

I will try not to let this get me down but resisting those foods was very difficult and borderline painful.

[Byakko]

I'm not sure if I can do this cold turkey. I've not been able to stick with anything. Seems like the more dogged and determined I am, the harder I fall. I want to do this all in one go. I feel like I'd feel and see more results. But planning is still an issue.

Well if I get nothing else right, I'll try to drink only water from now on.

[Byakko]

B: 2 eggs w/ dill, sea salt and black pepper. Cooked in coconut oil
L:
D:

[Byakko]

Although many people seem to not take this so seriously...I found it kind of shocking that a lot of the aspects of orthorexia fit the way I felt towards food. I can't seem to keep this primal/paleo thing up. I stress too much over it. I struggle with finding recipes I like because everything I want lies within the 'off limits'. I only gravitated toward this because it seemed simple but it almost feels like more work than what it's worth.

All I want is to eat and enjoy my food and have it nourish me without me always wondering if I'm getting the right levels of this or that or making sure something is gluten free or whatever.

Still, my bouts of IBS have made things difficult. Sometimes I can't eat anything without an attack (even with medication.) I think because of the fear I have for the intense pain and the embarrassment it all causes me, I find that I'm afraid to eat because I may get a reaction. I think I should get tested for food sensitivities so that I know for sure if there is something I should avoid or not.

[Byakko]

Alrighty so it's been a while since I posted.
Since then I've really fallen off the wagon.

However, last Friday I finally saw myself a nutritionist who I hope will set me on a path to better eating and a healthier digestive system. Not to seem hardheaded but it appears that many of you all on this forum were right when you said to try an elimination diet. Because that is exactly what I'm having to do. No, grains, dairy, rice, bananas or apples. She did allow me to have fruit juice, beans and Ezekiel bread only but I thought I'd take this opportunity to completely cut those things out (except the juice, but I am limiting it.)

What I was left with was the framework for primal/paleo eating. She also has me taking probiotics and triphala for digestive aid. We'll see how that works but at least it's natural. (Bloody huge pills though).

So today was my first day avoiding those things. Breakfast and Lunch could have been better in terms of being well rounded. All I had was juice and protein. But dinner was filled with london broil and seasoned kale. Snacks included dark chocolate (but it does contain milk) a handful of almonds and a nice large orange.

Unfortunately I'm still craving like mad. I'm starting to get a headache (though I'm not sure if it's from cravings.) For two weeks I have to keep up this way of eating. Not sure if that's enough time to really determine if I'll benefit.

Atm I'm looking for some quick primal/paleo sauces, dips and dressings.

[Byakko]

Back again...trying to get back on the wagon.

Apparently the nutritionist just didn't work out, which left me feeling very disappointed. While her focus was to heal my IBS she seemed to neglect my nutrition which to me is still very important. I hate feeling so restricted with eating but I need some one to help me figure out how to make my eating more well rounded. Since I last updated I'm down to 156 lbs but I'm not too enthusiastic about it. I haven't exercised and I've gone back to binging on unhealthy things so unfortunately I think I lost muscle and not fat.

I'm also just not feeling well period. Same old stomach problems, weakness, and all that horrible stuff. I am always inspired to see the success stories and successes in the making. Unless I just have some underlying issue that can't be solved with diet and exercise alone I want to do this. That said, I'd like to get some things straight.

How much protein, fat and carbs should I have daily?
I thought one of the perks for this diet was not having to measure and keep track of things, but if I must do this to insure I get nutrition and lose weight then I will.

I think I'll stick with the 50-100g of carbs daily since that seems to help aid in switching from sugar to fat burning. But protein and fats confuse me a little. One site said my body fat percentage was 32% but I have no idea if that's right. I'm not one of the die-hard health nuts so I don't know the best way of going about this. I just want to be fit and healthy. I think I am also going to try FODMAPS which is ultra restrictive. Either way I have to eliminate some things and see what works.

I have a bad feeling the urge to binge will come back with a vengeance. I've become a Kool-Aid fiend, something I hadn't had in years and was proud that I never craved it. But now that fruit juice seems to upset my stomach it's like I've fallen back on wanting some kind of flavored beverage (tea and coffee don't do it for me) but if I can beat a soda habit I feel like I can do this too.

Here's a sort of update on what has been going on with me.

-I've become a little more open to cooking now (though in some cases still unsure.) I've learned to make sweet potato "fries" and they taste good but I'm starting to think I need to let that be an occasional treat. They may or may not cause IBS symptoms if I over do it so I'll have to see. But easy to make and tasty and frankly found out I like sweet potato when seasoned well.

-AppleGate Farms hot dogs are very good to have on hand. I know they're not the ideal examples of primal protein (still not locally available though) but they're better than some. I may also try Hormel's turkey slices since they are nitrate free. I'd love to get organic grass fed meats but I have to be realistic. I'm not big on beef.

-I love dark chocolate but I think I should just stay away from it for a while. It could be helpful with dealing with sweet cravings but maybe I need to just toughen up and not "cheat" on even the paleo/primal approved treats.

-I'm starting to really appreciate the power of prepping...or pre-prepping. Since I've gotten better at cutting vegetables I don't think too much of having a go at them after dinner or if I'm feeling bored. Great for salads. Assembling is easy and fun.

-It's worth it to look into growing your own plants, whether it's veggies or herbs. I've successfully and easily regenerated spring onions that help zazz up my scrambled eggs. I hope to try something similar with bok choy (celery also works but I find it too strong for my tastes at times.) I think I got a solid month out of my spring onions before they started wilting. Hadn't even used them every day.

-Tried daikon. That day I felt sort of sick but I have no idea if the daikon had anything to do with it. BUT at least I know Kroger has them if I ever want to try again. I've never had any kind of radish so it was a new experience.

-I have a love/hate relationship with searching for recipes. I admit to not wanting to put in a lot of work when cooking but I'll eat a boot if it's flavorful.

-I have to strive not to let fruit become the thing that takes the place of my vices. 1 or 2 servings of fruit should be the limit. And I know when I start to crave fruit that it's just cravings for sugar. I shouldn't be eating dinner but thinking about how quickly I can get to my "dessert".

-I'm going to try practicing mindful eating. I don't gulp down food as much as my dad but I still need to take my time.

-Yoga. If nothing else, yoga! I sit far too much and I need to at least stretch my body so it won't be stiff.

-I've been exploring going barefoot but it hasn't been easy. Instead of my hiking Merrells, I've been wearing a pair of Keds. I still have foot pain and am always confused about how to walk (not run, walk). I just want my plantar fasciitis to go away!

[Byakko]

Bmelet with two eggs and cup of spinach, salt, pepper, and bits of spring onion
-tried to eat mindfully but I probably need to eat earlier *woke up real late*

[Byakko]

....Okay. Today was terrible in terms of eating...

First chance I get I'm ditching the Udi's gluten free bread. I somehow talked myself into thinking once I finished this loaf I'll never touch grains again but I should have just left it alone. That stupid "just one bite" mentality is a killer.

I really like eggs with spinach and it's a good way to work in veggies. I'd be nice if someone would comment though and tell me how to go about making sure I get enough of everything so I don't feel hungry and likely to cheat. I'm still not in a situation where I can avoid temptation.

I helped do some yard work today and I'm sure I'll be feeling it tomorrow but that's probably the most active I've been in a while. ><