the purple prose of petunia pettigrew page 128

[cori93437]

Well the Trail of Tears nowadays is commemorated by a few thousand dumbasses on motorcycles who feel that riding the trail that the American Indians walked is a perfectly feasible way to honor their struggle (and they think it's cool to shut down any travel across a major highway that goes from one side of the state to the other, making it impossible to get much of anywhere for 3-4 hours). And, it just so happens to be a big festival of drunkenness at the end of the trail, in the lovely town of Waterloo, Alabama. If you ever get a chance to go there, don't.

Strange... the version my great-Gramma told me would not have indicated any reason for happy party times at the end.
Stupid peoples.

[bloodorchid]

You stand in front of a mirror and say... "I hate the Bell ... "
No, no we don't... we don't ever say those things!

oh hhhheeeeeeeeeell naw we don't say those things D: i felt watched enough at the cemetary up there

[bloodorchid]

so i'm on foodnetwork.com right now. and i don't know my deal but seeing all that food, specifically the chicken salad, was sort of orgasmic

maybe i should have reordered my vitamin refill sooner.. or maybe food looks sexy today...

i'd love it if i had the money to hire a professional chef to cook several meals 3-4 days a week. watching the cooking process would be the foreplay and the first bite would be the money shot

but, alas..

[bloodorchid]

earlier general forum fussing led to memories which led to tears which led to studiously not thinking about it which led to 'yeah i'm fine' which led to an anxiety spiral which includes insecurity

sure, i need therapy

but since i'm studiously not thinking about it i'm going to distract myself so i stop wanting to cry

i've been taking 2 drops of iodine (because i put 2 and 3 together, got 8 and realized 5 drops likely made me overheat for a week) and i think i'm having detox on my scalp... i mean, i've colored it a few times, sure. and there was the great bleaching experiment of 1912. had it chemically straightened a couple times.

but this is making me feel like a gross dirty person

just pee out, dammit

i've had more salad greens the last 2 days than i have in a year. and i'm looking up juice feasts. i don't particularly want to go n a juice fast, per se, but i wouldn't mind drinking a gallon of juice a day and maybe eat food. or not. the anxiety spiral is shaking its head no at food, because food is bad.

but i did finally use my herbs in shrimp salad earlier. i feel so cool. and now i know not to use kelp every day on anything but the hibiscus because the sweet basil was starting to bud out and it's only a foot tall and barely shot off

the juice feasting people supp with msm, and i still have my bottle, but i'm kind of afraid to eat more because it made my breasts deflate. maybe i had too much? maybe my breasts have never been real breasts because i have high t? maybe the msm was straightening out hormones and my breasts were a casualty

maybe i need to ignore todays and this coming week's pain and work out, so i can ignore the resulting coming week's pain

because i don't like the anxious, insecure spiral that makes me timid and hesitant to even post on a damn forum

[bloodorchid]

i'm really not sure if i want to just keep looking at her or look like her or both



that butt!

sigh... stupid squats.. stupid actually doing them..

[bloodorchid]

my sleep has been crazy. i'm pretty sure this is why i can barely bring myself to shower, remember bad things and feel like a terrible person in general. weird sleep = depression amplification.

but food is 90/10 a day and there is something about shrimp and crab salad that i'm craving, so i've been eating a lot of it.

vitamins came in, so yay

i could live in Ahh Bras, easily. yes i said what the hell and bought one. then tonight i said hell yeah and bought another.

it helps that the price went down

bay's phone threw up so he can't text at the moment, just call. i said 'the things you do to get out of talking to me', he said 'yeah it's not like i like you or anything'

oh i know! i know. because i watch you through your windows.

[bloodorchid]

i checked the scale, salads up to my ears = 2 lb weight loss

i can dig it.

i was antsy and wanted to work out so i started up a vid to load, went and started a load of laundry and by the time i did that and picked up some the desire was completely gone. okay, i guess..

i also spent the last week brushing my teeth with just the brush and mouth rinse, cause people were like 'ohhh, my teeth are so much better without toothpaste' (insert annoying high pitched tone)

well ohhhh 2 of my teeth are sensitive tonight. and i really want a bowl of strawberries.

soda consumption is way way down, some days none and some days 2 at the most. i'd like to say Psht whatever i can quit any time i want! but apparently my quit times are not permanent. it likely ties in with my weird sleeping, i get tired for too long a time and i just want to feel awake, dammitall. and it spirals. it's an ugly ugly circle

[bloodorchid]

*deep breath*

RAAAAAAAAAAAAIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIINNNNNNNNNNN NNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN NNN!!!

wee

yeah i'm still awake. reading wellnessmama's remineralizing tooth powder thing and amazoning the costs, also reading more horror stories on curezone. it's cheaper than a movie ticket

[cori93437]

No rainnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn nnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn nnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn

Bumblebee girl makes me happy... that's why!
{{{hugs}}}

[bloodorchid]

i like watchin the puhhhddles gather ray hay haynnn

no more rain, just lightning *le sighs* you jinxed meh, cori!

Four Things You Shouldn’t Do With a Grenade - Funny Facebook Status Messages and Facebook Fails

bay fixed his pukey phone so i can resume with the gushy love stuff, cause he makes me gushy lovey

today was a gramma food day. i could have done much worse but is all good, tomorrow will be better

we were talking earlier about me not wanting to work out and he said to walk. i don't mind it. i don't know why ii don't do it. is maybe back soreness making me never wanting to do anything at all?

i joke about eating pills like candy but i hold back. maybe i should hold back a little less and get used to the not sore/stiff feeling