I almost cut and pasted the demon bells link into a conversation with a customer. Oops. Something tells me that wouldn't have gone over well.
Mud Flinger- I think something like that COULD work- just not that particular one. (Honestly, at this point, I'm wondering how long the marriage is going to last at all.) Actually, you should have heard my sister laugh when I told her I was trying out a poly relationship. "You? Share?!" Nothing like family to remind you who you are at the core. I've never been good at sharing
At the moment, though, I think it's best to work on me. I spent the weekend doing . . . nothing. It'd be nice to blame it on the phone call, but that's just the icing, not the cake. I felt like I was two people trapped in one skin. The one that kept saying "You have things you need to do! You need to get a post up! You need to go for a walk! You need to fill out applications! You need to eat right! You need to go water your gardens!" (yeah, it was that bad) and the one that heard the smart one but was apparently in charge of the corporeal body because none of those things happened. I slept. I read. I started reverting to my nocturnal self. I realized that I was devouring books because my own self was hollowed out and I needed someone else's words to fill me up because I had none of my own.
On the up side, I did make myself sun some, and I'm 2/3 of the way through Game of Thrones. It's good.
I should have started job hunting back in March or April when I knew I needed to get out. I held off because those are bad months. I was expecting to be better able to do it by May. But I waited too long. Now I have to figure out how to hold myself together AND figure out how to get the hell out without just quitting. Because I have to do this right. If I quit now, I don't know how long it will be before I get myself enough back together to go job hunting. Then I don't know how long the hunt will take. It's best to do these things from a position of power if at all possible. Even if the apparent strength is so brittle a light tap would make it collapse.