Almost dead and starting my fight.... page

[cybercutealicious]

Hi everyone.

Chapter 1: Thin -- Fat -- Thin -- Fat -- Nearly Dead

I've gone from thin to fat to thin to fat twice. I'm a 44 yr old

woman, very overweight, and I've done nothing wrong to get

here. I didnt not exercise. I didnt overeat. I ate veggies.

To understand all this I have to go back 15 years ago.

I was living in san francisco. A 70 step walk up. So naturally

I never carried UP spring water or anythign like that, I used

a water filter. A good one. Well back then we didn't know

about flouride but they were adding it. 5 yrs later my thyroid

went beserk. I got thin. Increadibly thin. I got down to 150

pounds (I'm 5'11 so thats near skeletor for me). My resting

pulse was 135 bpm.

The doctors discovered my high pulse in a routine checkup.

Blood work confirmed my thyroid was going nuts. "you have

graves disease" they said. They put me on beta blockers to

slow the heart. The pills made me break out and itch

everywhere. I felt sick. After 2 years of this I finally made

the worst decision of my life and agreed to destroy my thyroid

with radiation. "It will be easy. you will feel much better.

Its much easier to supplement than it is to slow down" Dr.

Greenspan, head of UCSF Parnassus Thyroid clinic. "will i gain

weight" I asked? "Most people do fine"

Well having been loaded with the biggest load of bullcrap and

it being early internet days... I made the biggest mistake of

my life. I voluntarily destroyed my thyroid.

They put me on the standard medicine. Synthroid. A T4

analogue. Your thyroid makes T4 (4 iodine molecules, a sort of

inactive buffer form) T3 (the active form which your heart and

organs use directly), T2 (critical for fat burning), T1, and

T0 (calcitonin), and god knows what else. But they put me on

just T4.

Before big pharma came in in the 60s and tried replace Armor

Thyroid, or thyroid medicine made from naturally dessicated

pig thyroid. It is measured and tested for amounts of T4 and

T3, but it contains everything. Well the new stuff was

supposed to be better because it was "synthetic" and they

bribed doctors to take it. Soon it was the only thing most

doctors would prescribe.

Well thats ok because they tested it with clinical trials.

right. RIGHT! I mean... they wouldn't give out something

untested. Well actually.. they grandfathered it in saying it

was the SAME THING as dessicated thyroid. (I forget if it was

levoxyl or synthroid or which was the first medicine to do

this).

So. Even though the molecule is modified (so it can be

patented) and its only one of FIVE molecules in the natural

medicine, they said it was the same.

Ok back to lil ol me. Well I took it. And I felt sick. Sea

sick. Buzzing. Room spinning. "This is normal" they said. I

gained weight. I was falling over. "this is normal". I gained

100 pounds in 8 months. "this happens sometimes lets adjust

your dose, you just need MORE" and on it went.

After a few years of this and being quite ill I researched on

the internet about Armor Thyroid. I immediately switched to

it. Within a year I had lost some weight and was still weak

but better and not so sick. Slowly I began to recover. I was

still eating what I thought was healthy vegetarian diet

consisting mostly of grains, cheese, and junkfood. It turns

out that the early testing of T4 only medications had been on

male medical students. Turns out females often can't convert

T4 to T3.

Well after some years of this and losing about 50 pounds from

my heaviest but still quite overweight, the FDA stepped in and

demanded that Armor Thyroid be retested/reformulated I'm not

quite sure what. But suddenly it was OFF the market. GONE.

My doctor suggest I try Synthroid again. I became sick by day

3. I mean room spinning nearly puking sick. By day 4 I couldnt

continue. I ordered T3 illegally from mexico.

I tried to work with my doctor on prescribing me T3. My blood

labs of TSH (how much thryoid medicine the pituitary is asking

for) and T4 and free T3 were all screwed up. The TSH was too

high. The T3 was too high. The T4 was too low. "I cant work

with this" and he refused to work with me.

At the time I had collapsed again and gone on disability

taking 4 weeks off work. I was a mess. I did more research.

Some people took ONLY T3 and required doses of up to 150MCG

for it to work. I was taking 5mcg. then 20. clearly my dose

was too low. I also read article after article that TSH was a

useless test. It was a money maker for big medicine. What I

needed to do was monitor my metabolism more directly. Body

temp was a good place to start. Reflex response was another. I

bought the best digital thermometer I could find online and

took my first temperature. 96.0. HOLY SHIT! 96.0? I also

noticed that the doctors had NEVER TAKEN MY TEMP in their

office. The next visit back I REQUESTED they take my temp.

"Oh... the doctor will do that if he feels you need it". He

never did.

I did more research. If you temperature goes below 95, you

should go immediately to the hospital. I was dangerously close

to being that cold. This was not at all normal.

I switched doctors. My new doctor refused to extend my

disability paperwork because he wasnt the original doc. Ok

whats money, I just need my meds I thought. I experimented

with my T3 dose and was now taking 25mcg T3 and 1grain of

Armor both. It had just come back on the market and was

reformulated. They swore it was the same stuff. But somehow...

it wasn't working. I dont know what happened. But I began to

get the SAME SICKLY FEELINGS I had taking Synthroid when I

took the Armor.

I stopped the Armor. I was just on T3 - 25mcg. By now I had

gained a lot of weight. OK I will fight hard, exercise, eat

right, and get healthy. But I was in a high stress job. I

started to fall over in the middle of the day at work. I

started having narcolepsy. Two three times a day I would just

"pass out" well it wasn't going unconscious it was more like a

power failure. I just slowly keeled over until I had to lay

down then I would come to and start shaking like convulsions

in my limbs and then slowly come out of it. I put a bean bag

in my office so I could rest when needed. Work called me in

and almost fired me. I agreed as a compromise to go on a 4 day

schedule. I was really sick. It was scary. At the next doctors

visit my weight... after all my exercising 3x weekly HARD and

eating right... it was up even higher. I felt sickly after

eating. I knew naturally to avoid grains and sugars. But no

matter what I did I was getting sicker. "Your liver enzymes

are still elevated" the doctor informed me. By then I had

stopped the Armor reformulation and was again trying pure t3.

My temperature was hovering around 96.5 degrees mid afternoon.

I increased the T3 to 50mcg and added over the counter T2

1000mcg. Ok at least I was getting some of the basic chemicals

now. My temperature increased to 97 degrees some days. But I

began to shake from the amount of T3. At least for now, this

was the most I could handle. (your body naturally produces

about 25mcg T3 daily but I had become resistent).

I was low estrogen and taking pure estradiol, which I had

switched to patches or gel to spare my liver. I had read about

estrogen dominance causing weight gain and talked to my 3rd

doctor about adding progesterone or using a balanced estrogen

mimicing what is human. "That stuff causes weight gain" he

replied.

Once again I was butting heads with the AMA orthodoxy. Which

is designed best as I can tell.. to make people chronically

sick so they can make more money. I started adding estriol

cream and progesterone cream to my estradiol. I started

feeling better. But by now.. it wasn't enough. I was really

overweight.

I reached the point where I realized... If i keep doing this

and trying to work a high stress job... I will die. I will

die. I will be dead in a year I am certain of it. My body was

telling me - no it was screaming "I'm EXHAUSTED THIS IS IT"

and I'd be a fool not to listen. I went into work and ... at

the end of the day handed the boss a letter. It explained my

liver was failing. I had to resign. Then I cried. I couldnt

even speak. I was always indestructable tough as nails work 80

hours a week kinda person. And I was broken. It was heart

breaking.

And well thats where I am now. I have researched and studied

and put together a plan to save my life.

(see part 2)

[cybercutealicious]

I saw the movie "fat sick and nearly dead"

Fat Sick and Nearly Dead | a Joe Cross Film about a slightly

overweight exec who goes on a sixty day juice fast. What

impressed me so much wasn't so much that HE got healthy. But

along his travels he meets a 450 pound truck driver. Later

that guy calls and asks for help. On the same regimen that guy

gets healthy. This was NOT the kinda guy you think could ever

get healthy. If he can do it... So can I. I also found on line

the story of dave the juicing truck driver, another truck

driver who went from very overweight to fit on juice.

Here is my theory. Slowly the liver gets impregnated with fat.

Its called Non alcoholic Fatty Liver disease. NAFLD. Its why

once you get fat you're screwed even if you diet and exercise.

At the end of the day you aren't getting your nutrients and

your body signals to eat MORE MORE. I had arrive there not

from truck driving overeating, but from estrogen dominance and

bad thyroid meds. Its gradual. It can take a decade before

your liver starts to kaput. I can almost guarantee you that

most very obese people have livers that are in this state.

Here is my guess why juice fasting is the rescue. First, your

body is not getting good digestion so is unable to get the

nutrients out of your food. Add high insulin and the cells are

clobbered. The juice fast fills your body with micronutrients.

And no fat. After two months, your liver has partially

recovered and you are healthy enough to begin a program like

paleo eating WHICH REQUIRES a good liver and bile system to

break down all those animal fats. Now I know that for many

people going straight to paleo eating produces great gradual

results. But if you are really sickly, consider the 60 day

juice fast.

So here I am. I've quit my job. I'm starting to juice and get

used to juice and about to start my juice fast as phase 1

before going strict paleo. Its the best my very sharp brain

has been able to figure out. My guess is... once my liver

requires I will again be able to handle the Armor medicine

which has more of the chemicals your real thyroid produces.

For now the T3/T2 is more like critical life support.

I will check in again mid way through my fast.

[belinda]

Wow! I hope the juicing and subsequent attempt at a paleo/primal diet helps you sort these troubles out. Good luck!

[cybercutealicious]

I know documenting it will keep me on track. so I'm trying to write it all up. But I wont do weigh ins... after i get closer to the end of it i'll let the docs tell me my progress. For now I'm doing some juicing trying to get the nutrient effect (but not the weight loss effect) and I feel a lot more perky and bouncy and alive.... and I'm trying to catch myself and eat more paleo. One of the hard changes is giving up fresh grapefruit juice, things like that. Its a carb overload. But the juicing camp recommends fresh juices of all kind. I think I will try to keep it to 2 apples with my green vegetables for some sweetness without the effect of orange juice hitting the insulin. I know theres not a lot of info on juicing here but mark does proclaim the benefits of intermittent fasting which is really what I am about to try. I read that the body cleans out dead cells and weak stuff when you fast, preventing you from getting sick.

[Hedonist]

Soooo sorry about your lousy experiences with conventional medicine. I hope your plan works out beautifully for you. Good luck!

[belinda]

Marthat did a recent juice fast. If you search her name and read her posts you might glean something you can use.

[Donnn]

There's at least one study that show fatty liver is substantially resolved in a couple weeks on low carb. Add coconut oil and the right liver herbs and vitamins low carb would work even better.
I think fat sick and nearly dead is great. I'm not sold on the juice fast if it contains significant amounts of fructose. I think vegetable juicing is interesting.

[cybercutealicious]

I didn't do very well on the juice fasting. I had like 4 restarts. I made it 5 days. Its supposed to get easier. and it kinda does but.. the sheer boredom is as hard as the hunger. So lately I have been making healthy green juice every other day as a micronutrient push. And finally this week I decided that if I do juice fast, when i go off it I will eat strictly primal. So I've been primal for about a week and ... IVE GAINED TWO POUNDS. Not exactly the start I had expected. Its probably a bit of overeating being excited to have solid food again. Anyways I baked my first tray of high end smoked bacon and omg. Its literally the first bacon I've cooked in my life. I have to say I think I can even put the cheese away for the bacon. And its so easy.. just 20 mins in the oven. I picked up a store roasted chicken. Never again. All salt. ick. what the heck did they do to it! from now on I roast my own!

Well I haven't lost any weight I will chalk it up to the fact that I was eating cheese. And I will try to get a bit more veggie salad in. The first thing I notice is my energy level is way up. From someone so sickly they could barely go up the stairs 2 steps for each stair, now I challenge myself to run up each time. thats not easy at my huge weight. But I do it. I feel ... like hitting a punching bag or something. Its weird. Like major vroom. Suddenly I want to fix my flat bicycle tires that have been flat for 2 years and get riding. I think... what has happened is my insulin has cleared enough that my cells are finally getting some damn energy. So I'm not convinced I can juice fast. I will play with it. I will maybe fast a day. But the 60 day transform your life... at least now .. I can't do it. It may be that I was too sick to do it. I can believe that. I was really close to deaths door.

My great recipe for ground beef:

Brown 2 pasilla peppers, and one large onion in a big skillet
add 2 pounds 85 ground beef and brown
add one quart of good salsa (in a glass jar)
chop up some tomatos and add
add 1 can tomato paste
tons of black pepper. pinch of salt. pinch of cumin. worcester or dark soy to taste

cook down over an hour. WOW. pure yum.
and its food for 2 days.

My mistake? I added cheese to it. It became a brick. I felt sick because I'm sure that changed it to a brick in my stomach. Hey maybe thats the 2 pounds I gained????

[mamacaz]

Wow! You sure have been thru hell with this. I'm so glad you are taking charge and wish you every success in regaining your health. Very interesting about the TSH test - my nurse friend told me not to bother with that one and always request the TFT (thyroid probs run in our family).

Something I like as a liver tonic is dandelion tea (I call it 'coffee' as it is my substitute). I drink a cup each day and have gotten so used to the taste that I really enjoy it. It is very good for your liver (as are all the bitter things) if you can tolerate it.

I look forward to hearing more of your progress!

[Issabeau]

My husband had similar problems. His liver was shutting down. After years of dealing with flawed CW, he now takes flash-frozen RAW liver, spleen, thymus, thyroid and pancreas supplements.
He also takes Ox-bile. I received a phone call from the doctor asking what I am giving my husband that healed his liver.
On his last blood test nothing was mentioned other than Triglycerides still being high. He won't stop eating granola for breakfast.
We're assuming his liver is now okay because the last 2 tests nothing was mentioned.

He always drives to the doctor by himself and never asks specifics...next blood testing and results I will be with him and demand a copy of the results. I'm sure glad his liver is no longer failing.