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  1. #1
    ChasePaleo's Avatar
    ChasePaleo is offline Junior Member
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    Being Healthy Is Apparently Socially Unnattractive

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    Recently, I have started up a blog with my primal/paleo journey and I share the links on Facebook. A few women I know that are overweight started discussing to me how what I'm doing is highly extreme and makes doing social things extremely difficult. Within minutes it attracted the attention of the other women, they shared their opinions "Why can't you just eat sensible" "Being a health freak is unnattractive" "Health concious people are so annoying."

    This shocked me so I started to speak to one of them personally, she said to me that and I quote, "I would rather be ugly and happy then look good by having to walk on egg shells." Of course to which I said that you can actually eat egg shells, alas she did not get my humour!

    I have noticed this belief amongst my current social circle because not drinking and eating out with friends at unhealthy places is considered normal. Even my mother who is overweight has told me that eating extreme will isolate you from society.

    What is this notion of having to conform to peer pressure because the majority don't take care of their bodies? Why is making strict health choices such a bad thing? As anyone else come across this? It may just be a cultural thing (I live in the UK where drinking is considered standard in order to be social)

    What is your social life like after being Primal?
    Last edited by ChasePaleo; 09-02-2011 at 11:56 AM.

  2. #2
    davem's Avatar
    davem is offline Senior Member
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    I left peer pressure behind in high school.
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  3. #3
    Mike Gager's Avatar
    Mike Gager is offline Senior Member
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    people i tell about it kind of laugh it off like is some fad or whatever. i try to make it as "unextreme" sounding as i can to people but they just dont get it
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    iniQuity's Avatar
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    I make concessions where needed. Life is really long (ideally, right?) so I'm willing to sacrifice a meal or so a week in order to enjoy my time with friends. At the same time, this doesn't mean eating absolute crap, it just means I'll eat my usual meat and vegetables but I won't pay any mind to how it was prepared, etc.

    My friends know how I eat, some have their opinions on it, they rarely get vocal about it. You have to also realize that since our society is so screwed up when it comes to food, we really are total outsiders. Our lifestyle isn't seen as "fun" at ALL.

    I've also realized that people need to be enabled, through having you participate in their (insert unhealthy activity) they in turn feel justified to continue to do so. I often don't drink when I go out with friends, they're used to it now, but when I first made the change I was met with a lot of resistance and "come on! just one drink isn't going to do anything, loosen up, have fun!" and I had to remind them that I was having plenty of fun, and would have even more fun if they would just let me be.

  5. #5
    dado's Avatar
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    i don't court nor count obese tv-watchers as friends.

    i've been an unpopular dude since my young days, and i take this as a sign of doing something right.

    in general, when the Crowds is against you, you're on the right path. take their stupid comments as an affirmation of your righteousness and their mental weakness.

    of course, if the cash money is on the line, you gotta be ready to ditch everything and play the game; this is moral pragmatism in it's simplest form.

    it's up to you to balance this.

  6. #6
    Kvalhion's Avatar
    Kvalhion is offline Senior Member
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    If people do not like how I eat, then it really is their problem. They are going to have a hard time convincing me that not eating grains and sugar is somehow "extreme". If it came down to it, I guess I'd just have to make new friends. Misery loves company, yet I prefer not to be miserable.

    Social life is pretty much the same, other than finding a hot mostly-primal girlfriend after losing a bunch of weight. =)
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  7. #7
    Yvonne PHX's Avatar
    Yvonne PHX Guest
    Quote Originally Posted by iniQuity View Post
    I make concessions where needed. Life is really long (ideally, right?) so I'm willing to sacrifice a meal or so a week in order to enjoy my time with friends. At the same time, this doesn't mean eating absolute crap, it just means I'll eat my usual meat and vegetables but I won't pay any mind to how it was prepared, etc.

    My friends know how I eat, some have their opinions on it, they rarely get vocal about it. You have to also realize that since our society is so screwed up when it comes to food, we really are total outsiders. Our lifestyle isn't seen as "fun" at ALL.

    I've also realized that people need to be enabled, through having you participate in their (insert unhealthy activity) they in turn feel justified to continue to do so. I often don't drink when I go out with friends, they're used to it now, but when I first made the change I was met with a lot of resistance and "come on! just one drink isn't going to do anything, loosen up, have fun!" and I had to remind them that I was having plenty of fun, and would have even more fun if they would just let me be.
    +1. I find that if you don't make a big deal out of it, nobody else will. Do what you do and don't preach to others about what they do, and everyone can be friends.

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    SlimIcy's Avatar
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    The Unknown is scary.

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    iniQuity's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Yvonne PHX View Post
    +1. I find that if you don't make a big deal out of it, nobody else will. Do what you do and don't preach to others about what they do, and everyone can be friends.
    I was working with an overweight girl once, she wanted to buy me something to drink from starbucks. I asked for an iced green tea without sugar, she asked why I bothered to do all these 'healthy things' if I was 'so skinny' ... I asked her to consider if there was any correlation between the things I did and the way I looked. She got a green tea with less sugar than she usually did (instead of some milk-shakey sugary monstrosity she typically got). We had a casual chat about how I eat, we don't work together anymore, so I'm not sure if she ever tried to implement anything, but something tells me she probably started making small adjustments and I hope they served her well.

  10. #10
    Waskydiver's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ChasePaleo View Post
    "I would rather be ugly and happy then look good by having to walk on egg shells."
    To this, I would be interested in the backgound of the person saying it.

    Can they say that they have TRIED to be healthy? Have they set out with a goal of living a healthy lifestyle, achieved that goal, and found it to be undesirable?

    I would find it hard to believe that many people have acheived a healthy, fit, lifestyle, and found their lives to by unhappy because of it, so decided to plant themselves on the couch and pour on the pounds.

    More likely, they may have never been fit and healthy in their adult lives, so have no basis of comparision as to which way they would be more happy.

    OR... They look upon the fit and healthy with envy, and have made many many attempts to acheive that themselves, but, for whatever reason (misinformation, lack of resolve), have failed in thier attempts.

    So, they sit back, bowl of chips in lap, and proclaim that THEY are the ones who are happy... failed asperations and all.

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