Gay Panda fell off the high-fat wagon. To maintain a pure and blameless self-image, as I like to do, the panda paw is pointed accusingly at A: December, in which relatives visited and wanted to go to a restaurant; B: December, in which Lady Friend inconveniently scheduled her birthday and wanted to go to a restaurant; and C: December, because it can’t fight back against unfair charges.
My daily intake of carbohydrates was still low (I’d be surprised if I cleared sixty), but my protein increased and my fat decreased, and all weight loss stopped. The panda body has a deep affection for 185 pounds and cannot bear to be parted from it for very long. However, I do not have a deep affection for 185 pounds, and I can bear to be parted from it permanently. This means I should return to high fat and see if I can shake it.
Why does high fat have to be so disgusting? I’m tempted just to whip up a bowl of heavy cream and live off that and walnuts and meatballs and egg yolks. Guacamole has gotten tiresome and even though I shaved the fatty bits of meat into little pieces and swallowed them whole, I still couldn’t tolerate too much. And I would rather starve than eat macadamia nuts or cream cheese or coconut oil. But I cannot deny that high fat swiftly dropped me from the slap of 189.6. My potato cravings finally died, so that now I only think of potatoes with my usual level of adoration instead of overwhelming lust. I even turned down a baked potato offered to me the other day*. So high fat it is. EW.
The adult course of action would be to fill out my grocery list and get on with it instead of kvetching in my journal, but we all know which I chose. High fat is nasty. Yet I am interested to see what my body will do with Round Two of High Fat after the stunning success of Round One. Of course, Round One was just eliminating several pounds of water from intense bouts of Potato Time, not fat. If my lowest has been 184.2 and I’m currently 185.2, I can’t say I’m retaining much water right now. But I’m still curious what Round Two will do. Maybe it won’t do anything. But who doesn’t like a science experiment with their own body?
Since I have already flaunted my mathematical genius before you, and it isn’t very modest to do so a second time, I will accept the ratios provided by my phone app instead of performing calculations in my head**. I was eating about 69-70% during Round One according to the phone, which is currently missing since Benign Poltergeist was on a tear last night. The pillows are askew on the sofa, the throw is not where I remember leaving it, and my phone is just gone. Primal Coach Kitty is so exhausted from defending my belongings and the honor of her late mother that she passed out on a chair and hasn’t even flicked an ear for hours. Thankfully, I wasn’t trying to sleep last night. Oh, wait, I WAS.
Round Two. I can’t put it off because vacation is approaching, and trying to eat this way while on the road will make me insane. I have no restaurant invitations in the near future. I have few non-primal foodstuffs in the house***. I have no excuse, not even December. So here we are.
ROUND TWO OF HIGH FAT: