10-25-2011, 04:14 PM
Oh thanks!!! Now to steal Panda's Pork and cook it up... this sounds so yummy.
Originally Posted by phreebie
10-25-2011, 05:12 PM
Yikes, these cravings! I'm not used to them. If I haven't had sugar recently, I'm not interested in sugar. But that soda and gelato have made me Very Interested in sugar since Friday. Today I thought about taking out a spoon and rooting around on my highest pantry shelf for the bag of brown sugar that lives up there in the darkness. I did not do this, but I was surprised to find myself considering it. Yuck. Hope yours go away, too!
Originally Posted by lucyh
Oh Valhalla, I'm so behind the times that I am going to have to Google Nook and learn what it is. It is time for Gay Panda to join you in this century.
10-25-2011, 05:14 PM
That cracked me up.
Originally Posted by Debdoub
10-25-2011, 10:00 PM
mmm, brown sugar. I have eaten far too much dark chocolate the last two days, my bar of Green & Blacks organic 85% dark that should last at least a week is half gone after only two days. uh oh.
Originally Posted by Gay Panda
Nook is just an eReader, it's from Barnes & Noble. I have the Nook Color, it's pretty snazzy. I like books, but we have no more shelf space, and surprisingly, I am liking eBooks more than I expected.
10-26-2011, 10:57 AM
PART ONE: No one wants to be told that one is sagging.
My temper rose at the indignity of being informed that I sag. I know that I sag. The panda belly has the gentle curve of a crescent moon; my arms make little loose flaps in response to gravity. I do not spend time straining to see the panda rump in the hall mirror, or setting up a complicated system of mirrors in order to do so, but I imagine that it sags, too. Soft foothills rise and fall along my back. My double chin is on the latter side of more or less, but there is still a hint of its former glory.
There are certain areas of life to which we can be oversensitive to criticism. A relative of Lady Friend’s was incredibly oversensitive about his driving. He was also incredibly bad at it, treating mountain curves like NASCAR and stubbornly going the wrong way up one-way streets screaming that he was right while everyone else was screaming at the headlights bearing down from cars coming the other direction. On no level and at no time was he rational in regards to his behavior behind the wheel, and Lady Friend finally refused to ever get in a car with him again.
For some people, the oversensitivity is their pets. My neighbor Eye of the Storm lives in the center of a Whine Whirlpool created by her family. She lavishes all of her affection on her dog Sauron, who is a most hateful little beagle, and though it bites and snaps and lunges and barks out of control, you cannot say anything about her precious. Lady Friend made the mistake of warning a deliveryman about to try to pet Sauron that he would be mistaken for a hobbit ring-bearer and lose his finger, and Eye of the Storm hasn’t really spoken to Lady Friend since.
On two memorable occasions, I have seen this extreme oversensitivity applied to offspring. In the first case, a student at a school where I worked was caught cruelly teasing two mentally handicapped boys. The teacher told the student that she expected better from her. The student went home and told her mother, and the next day, her mother stormed into the school and tried to get the teacher fired. How DARE she criticize her child? And WHY were mentally handicapped kids there to be teased anyway? They should be in their own school, and then her poor daughter wouldn’t be upset.
The other time was when the parents of a student were called to pick up their child for the day. Little Dumpling had called a teacher one of The Bad Words in response to being told to take out a book, and then struck him. Upon being informed of their child’s misdeeds, I would like you to guess the parents’ response:
A: They strong-armed the child out the door and straight into a long, Xbox-free grounding.
B: They made the child apologize to the teacher in front of the class.
C: They told the child feebly, “That’s not nice!”
D: They gave the child a hug and said, “I’m so sorry that the teacher made you angry!”
If you circled D, give yourself a Panda Pat. So upset that their child had been placed in a situation where Little Dumpling had been forced to strike a teacher, so upset that they were then called to the principal’s office when it wasn’t their child at fault, they transferred to another school. By fourth grade, Little Dumpling had attended three different elementary schools in the same district.
I am overly sensitive about my body, which is so common a sensitivity that I am sure it shocks no one, and that many of you (if not most of you) share it. I don’t want to be fat and unattractive and invisible. Very few people would consider me hot, but I still want to look nice. Yet for all the work I did for years, running miles and starving myself, I couldn’t. For outraged seconds upon being told that I sag, my mind tumbled with how much weight I’ve lost, the time I’ve put into learning about the food my body needs and taking care of it, and I was indignant and betrayed and self-conscious. And then I realized that the comment was directed to my jeans, not my body, and the emotional Death Star receded. At least I hadn’t said anything yet, delivering an angry retort to a compliment.
Last edited by Gay Panda; 10-26-2011 at 11:19 AM.
10-26-2011, 11:16 AM
PART TWO: My jeans are sagging again. In mid-April I began primal, and by June, my jeans were ridiculously baggy. I went down a size. Happily for my wallet, I had several pairs of the size down in my drawers, untouched for years. Now it is happening again. I can just about pull them off without needing to unfasten first. It is not a huge sag yet, but now that it has been pointed out to me, it is definitely noticeable. I don’t fill them out the way I did in June, and when I stand up now in October, I’m having to haul them back up to my waist.
However, I do not have the next size down in my drawers. It will be strange to buy that size when I go shopping in November, because I never thought that I would see that size again. Not only that, it’s a number that I associate with the large side of normal. On May 17th, the day I began taking measurements, my waist was 34 inches around. As of October 23rd, it is 29¾. Gay Panda approves of this.
I should pull Lady Friend along with me to shop. Even though her body is far fussier than fussy Gay Panda’s, and she’s having to do a confusing mix of primal/Atkins/modified fat fasts to get her body to respond, her waist has dropped from 42 3/8 inches to just under 38. Her pants look silly on her, loose material hanging about her hips where months ago it tightly stretched. She is also pleased. At her worst, her High Score was 274 pounds. In April she was bouncing about 260, and now she is 239.8. That is awesome, because today she is at work being filmed for a television show, and she would much rather be 239.8 with cameras on her than April’s 260 or her High Score of 274.
Of course, she would rather be smaller than that, but her body doesn’t let go of its fat easily. However, its configuration has certainly changed. If Lady Friend does not acquire smaller pants, her crew will be able to file a sexual harassment lawsuit against her when the bigger ones fall off in a breeze. Or you may one day see outtakes of a show in which a crisp autumn wind shakes the leaves of the trees, and a woman speaking confidently to the camera suddenly whitens and grabs for her pants as they plummet.
So there will be a Fabulous Shopping Adventure next month, perhaps with steak afterwards. And I think, once I’m home and removing the size tag from my new jeans, I might have to keep it. I have no idea what I am going to do with the tag. I could frame it, or tuck it in my sock drawer, or show it off at parties since I need an icebreaker and no one ever wants to know about Mistress Delilah or sneezing fetishes. (What is WRONG with you people? How can you not want to know?)
Or maybe I should mail it to Mark Sisson in a thank you card, and he can be amused that the world contains such very weird people, and that one of them keeps a journal on his website.
10-26-2011, 11:30 AM
Panda, I should have loaned you my kids when they were little. Then sagging and extra weight would be a good thing because "you're soft and comfy". Not that I felt good when I heard it, but that sweet little face really did mean it.
Another time, my oldest told me she was built weird because her butt stuck out more than her stomach. I had to admit that even though it was true for every member of my family over age 40, it wasn't really how you were supposed to be built. Poor sucker (all sarcasm intended) is now 16, 5'10" tall, 135pounds of pure muscle. You can bet she no longer wants to be built like me!
Finally, I always listen to my kids when they start relating a negative experience and then I ask "what did you do in all this?" Rarely is a kid blameless, whether being called a name by a sibling, singled out be a teacher, coach or other adult, or getting into it with another kid. They know they can tell me but they also know that mom is not going to buy it hook, line and sinker.
My goal has always been for them to have happy, productive lives, living somewhere BESIDES in my house. If I take their side every time, never let them take responsibility for their actions, do everything for them, then I will have failed and boy oh boy, do I hate to fail! (I've been known to tell them "I'm not going to college with you to do your hair so you'd better get moving" in the morning, as that long, curly hair is hell to take care of. But they do.)
And I see (and hear) kids all day long whose parents must want them living in their basement forever, because their little darlings could never be in the wrong.
Best example of a helicopter parent - the mom who checks her daughter's grades every day online and then hassles her and the teachers about the scores...and the girl is a junior in high school. She also monitors every bite that goes in her daughter's mouth, which has backfired as she'll visit a friend and eat all the junk she can. Why do parents do this to their kids??
10-26-2011, 12:16 PM
I'm glad that where I worked, irresponsible parents were the deviation, not the norm! I never became a parent and I don't know firsthand the stresses and uncertainties and exhaustion, but I know from observation of hundreds of families that the ones who functioned most poorly were the ones in which there were no expectations for the children. No rules, no schedules, no responsibilities, and the parents catered to every whim and indulged every misbehavior.
Originally Posted by Debdoub
I once watched a four-year-old get out of his carpool, stride into his home, and tell his mother, "We're going to the toy store. Get your purse."
And she said, "Okay, honey, let Mommy run to the bathroom first."
This child then let himself into the family car AND LAID ON THE HORN, yelling at her to hurry.
And she hurried.
They went to the toy store, and he got two toys for being a good boy.
Gay Panda was speechless. Like I said, I never had kids, and I don't know the kind of parent I would have been. But I don't think that this particular parent's reaction would have been mine, or yours, or pretty much any other parent I have ever met.
10-26-2011, 12:19 PM
Thank you for the information on Lulu and Smashwords, lilyheart and DJY!
10-26-2011, 01:21 PM
Surely--hope something works out for you--
Originally Posted by Gay Panda