Primal With A Side Of FABULOUS page 502

[phigment]

¤¤¤¤ Drags herself in slowly¤¤¤
I just finished you entire journal. From start to finish during my three sick days from work. I laughed alot, which turned to coughing, which turned to wheezing. Great job, but why did the fairy of resolve change sex? Now i need to get some sleep because i have to be in hell/job at 5 in the morning.

¤¤¤¤crawls out¤¤¤

[naiadknight]

Will you get Debauchery the hell out of West Texas?! The little tart snuck in and I'll be blasted if I can catch her long enough to stuff her in a mailer envelope.

[jenn26point2]

¤¤¤¤ Drags herself in slowly¤¤¤
I just finished you entire journal. From start to finish during my three sick days from work. I laughed alot, which turned to coughing, which turned to wheezing. Great job, but why did the fairy of resolve change sex? Now i need to get some sleep because i have to be in hell/job at 5 in the morning.

¤¤¤¤crawls out¤¤¤

I think Resolve (and the other fairies) change sex so that GP can keep us on our toes about his/her own physical gender.

[Owly]

Debauchery is flying around the world making people eat peanut butter. I found a jar we bought for my sweetie tucked into the pantry, and I cracked it open and started eating it with a spoon. Even though it's the natural, sugar-free, unsalted type, I'm pretty sure downing several spoonfuls of it is not a good idea.

Also, I may or may not have gotten some in my hair.

[Gay Panda]

¤¤¤¤ Drags herself in slowly¤¤¤
I just finished you entire journal. From start to finish during my three sick days from work. I laughed alot, which turned to coughing, which turned to wheezing. Great job, but why did the fairy of resolve change sex? Now i need to get some sleep because i have to be in hell/job at 5 in the morning.

¤¤¤¤crawls out¤¤¤

Hi phigment!!! Hope you're feeling better.

I am not responsible for accidental fairy sex-changes while under influence of heavy drugs for headaches.

Oh, hell/jobs. I am immediately reminded of Mr. Magazine Time and how he used to call me at 6:30 in the morning to 'touch base'. Ugh.

[Gay Panda]

I don't want to know what either of those are! GayPanda, you are freaking me out!

How can you not want to know?!?!??!

Ear spoon: a delightful little device employed for the removal of wax from the ear canal.

Gosselin Spankin' Spoon: a reference to a recent pop culture explosion that the beloved* mother-of-multiples Kate Gosselin beat her children with a wooden spoon when they misbehaved.

* Beloved = Harpie

[Gay Panda]

ZOMG, NO ONE TOLD ME THERE WAS A LEGO LORD OF THE RINGS PLAYSTATION 3 GAME!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[cori93437]

Wait... resolve was a male fairy right... I thought I managed to keep continuity on that one?

That's why Resolve spends so much time with me... he's my GBF!
When polygamy becomes legal I'ma talk my husband into letting this become a more permanent relationship.
Or not.
Husband isn't THAT adventurous.
And I just don't think Resolve is too into Cubby types. Breaks my poor little heart. *sigh*

[Gay Panda]

Well, let's just clear up whatever pronoun confusion I created in the fairies -

Resolve: female
Remorse: male
DEBAUCHERY: A BOOTY-SHAKIN' LADY!!!

[Gay Panda]

Ah, here are some of the original descriptions:

Fairy of Debauchery: a blowsy blonde about six inches in height, who perches precariously on my shoulder shouting, “CHUG! CHUG! CHUG!” while waving about a mug of ale and munching on Twizzlers. She burps and swears and farts, sings and kicks her feet and spills food and drink down my shirt, and is of such joyous spirit that one cannot help but be drawn in to her gaiety. The Fairy of Debauchery has an IQ about a fifth of mine, and when I tried to reason with her about not buying the smiley face cupcake in the deli case several days ago, that cupcakes contain wheat and sugar and these things make me ill and swell to the size of Panada, she hiccupped with gusto and banged her mug of ale against my ear and shouted, “LET’S BUY TWO!”

Fairy of Resolve: a humorless (female) librarian, who has the emotional range of an Excel Spreadsheet.

Fairy of Remorse: a thin little no-nonsense man in a sensible business suit, who never loses his composure and whose legs are always crossed at the ankle.