Cori, I'm also a survivor of an abusive family and a very abusive adult relationship. I don't want to see others go through that and hope that the educational stuff I did with kids might have helped at least a couple of teens recognize abusive patterns and know how to get help.
I used to tell them that many of us don't have good examples of healthy relationships in our lives--our parents' relationships are unhealthy, we don't see good examples in the media, and many other people around us might also engage in unhealthy behaviours. A lot of kids grow up having no idea that they actually have the right to things like free and open consent, respect from a partner (or friend, or co-worker), and equitable decision making and power in their relationships.
And yeah, kink, bdsm, and other stuff can definitely be written to reflect healthy ideas about consent, pleasure, and sexuality.