You wrote a fine little description blurb and then I made it better. So no more whining.
Primal since March 5, 2012
SW: 221 | CW: 182 | LPW: 166 | UGW: 140 (80 lbs loss)
Where, oh where, can my Panda be? Someone took Panda away from
Me. Panda's gone, so Ive got to be good. So I can see my Panda when I
Come back to this MDA world....
(To the tune of Pearl Jam's Last Kiss, of course... provided below in case someone isn't familiar)
Last edited by cori93437; 06-25-2012 at 12:42 PM.
“You have your way. I have my way. As for the right way, the correct way, and the only way, it does not exist.”
And that's why I'm here eating HFLC Primal/Paleo.
GAY PANDA: Ooooh, I think I see them in the hot bar!
DEBAUCHERY: ZOMG, WE’RE GETTING CLOSER!!! CLOSER!!! JUST A LITTLE MORE---
REMORSE: Steer the cart just a smidge to the right!
RESOLVE: Roll! Roll! Roll!
GAY PANDA: Wait, those aren’t potatoes.
DEBAUCHERY: WHAT THE HELL ARE THOSE???
REMORSE: The sign says succotash. What’s succotash? They look like potatoes, and yet . . . they don’t. You went to college, Gay Panda, what’s succotash?
GAY PANDA: It was a medieval torture device used on heretics and Commies.
REMORSE: Every time you lie, your ear twitches.
GAY PANDA: I went to a liberal arts school, for Valhalla’s sake! We didn’t learn anything practical. I have no idea what succotash is. But that’s the only sign nearby, so those faux potatoes must be succotash. Gross!
DEBAUCHERY: NO POTATOES??? BUT . . . BUT . . . BUT . . .
GAY PANDA: Oh, don’t cry, Debauchery!
RESOLVE: Oh, no, there she goes. Get her some chocolate, Gay Panda.
GAY PANDA: Okay, chocolate . . . no, she’s still crying.
RESOLVE: Get her some licorice. Over there, two shelves down.
GAY PANDA: Okay, chocolate and licorice and . . . come on, Debauchery, the world will not end because you were out-foxed by succotash. See? Look how concerned your friends are. They put all these treats in the cart to make you feel better.
RESOLVE: Chocolate and licorice are perfectly primal . . . wait, what?
REMORSE: You were saying that chocolate . . . hey! GAY PANDA!
GAY PANDA: Dammit, the hypnosis wore off faster than I expected. Okay, you two, just follow the swinging watch and clear your minds again . . .
RESOLVE: Gay Panda, get those items out of the cart!
REMORSE: You’re a horrible panda, hypnotizing us to see if you could get away with potatoes. Well, it serves you right that they didn’t have any today. Put the chocolate and licorice away!
GAY PANDA: Don’t say that about potatoes, Remorse. Not having potatoes is too cruel a punishment for the crime. I have to practice my hypnosis on someone, and Lady Friend has too strong a mind. We’ll try again on her later . . . here you go, slack-jawed cashier . . . when she least expects it. I know! We’ll get her on Friday when she’s tired from the week and much more open to suggestion . . . yes, please double bag, stoned bagboy . . . and see just how far we can push it. Maybe we can even plant a message deep in her mind that says GAY PANDA DOESN’T WANT TO PLAY GUESS THE STAIN ON MY PANTS so she will never ask me again to identify what sheep leavings have soiled her Carhartts . . . oh, it’s a nice day out here! Let’s hurry up and get back inside to the computer.
DEBAUCHERY: ZOMG, YOU BOUGHT ME CHOCOLATE AND LICORICE!!!
RESOLVE: You were just distracting us with that spiel to get through line, weren't you?
REMORSE: Well-played, Panda, well-played.
Oh yeah! I forgot about my Betta named Adonis!
My roommates before this one had: Cleopatra (cat, Caesar had wandered off), Anubis (ball python), Raydon (black dog- would have been Gandolf but LOTR came out that year so it was a bit too much of the "in" name), Graham (not their fault, the dog came with the name), and Boo, Cleo's mini-me
A lot of my pets came pre-named because I got them after they were grown. No pets now, but in the past I've had:
German Shepherd - Cinderella, Cindy for short (she was gray like cinders)
Pekingese/Cocker Spaniel mix - Hobo (he was a bum of the highest order)
4 black and white Tuxedo toms from the same litter - Felix, Sylvester, Tom, and I can never remember the other one's name.
Shepherd/Wolfhound/Husky mix - Female was Heidi and male was Wolf
Big black tom - Judd
Miniature Schnauzer whose name was originally Fritz, but I renamed him Bailey's PB Fritzenheimer for the registration papers and then lost them before I could send them in. (the PB stood for Poodle Butt because my ex thought he had a roll in his stroll)
Oh, I almost forgot, Black Lab/Shepherd mix named Bullet by my ex for some unfathomable reason.
"There are nights when the wolves are silent and only the moon howls." - George Carlin
I worked at a kennel and there was a family that dropped off their bull terrier named Dozer and their rottie named Diamond. The obvious "his and hers" tickled me.