Primal With A Side Of FABULOUS page 196

[Gay Panda]

*giggle* I'm so stupid!

Pause

Pause

Oh- you were waiting for me to disagree?

If only . . .

You win the Gay Panda Funny Point for today!!! That had me howling.

[Urban Forager]

And what was that fuzzy black thing on Bat Woman's shoulder? Lady Friend and I have puzzled over that for years.

I couldn't tell ya. I was curious about the painting in her hide out.... there was a bat and a moon and something that looked like a mutant zombie hand, I kept getting distracted by wondering what it was. And then the scene would cut and I hadn't heard a thing bat women said.

Didn't you find the short about cheating helpful? Now I know why it is better to tattle then to cheat. Gosh I hope I watched something like that when I was a kid and it some how got into my subconscious, I'd hate to think that I only just learned it.

[Ryokumuji]

I don't think that I'd find anything different if I'd opened my personal File: Scorpio.

Probably not! To add some more fun to that story.... She actually got pregnant during the time I knew her and she was horrified because her babies due date? Between October 25th and October 31th... Planting her baby as a Scorpio. I just sat there and smiled.

Your story about Toodles is funny because... I am a lab tech myself! But thankfully I don't work with anyone as zany as Toodles, although we do have someone I refer to as Princess... Because she thinks she's the Ruler of the Lab and us plebeians are VERY lucky to have her around to tell us what to do.

...I also lived with her for three years. It was not happy times for me.

[drssgchic]

You win the Gay Panda Funny Point for today!!! That had me howling.

Yes! Now I've joined the cool kids with Panda Points!

[Gay Panda]

PART FOUR:

“I’m BOOOOOOOOOOORRRRRRRRREEEEEEEED!”
I stared resolutely at my paperwork as I sat at the lab machines. “It’s a good idea to bring a book.”
THUD-THUD-THUD. “Is it always so booooooorrrrrrrrriiiiiiiinnnnngggg?”
“Not if you have a book.”

There were long periods in the lab in which I was running around like my hair was on fire. Then there were long periods in the lab in which I sat at instruments waiting for them to take readings, and there was nothing to do. Because watching a machine spin for 90 seconds each for the duration of 150 tests is not an exciting activity, I brought a book to read or took notes on Runemaster, the book I was writing at the time. In other years, I’d worked with a wonderful woman who had a plethora of wacky friends, and she told me all about them for hours. We talked about what a jackass Mr. Magazine Time was, and how Mrs. Magazine Time was every bit as weird, and passed the time pleasantly.

But Toodles was beginning to grate on my nerves. She kicked and squirmed and complained about boredom and giggled my bad incessantly, and as the busy season got into gear and the phone rang more often, she finished every call with a cheery cry of toodles. Sometimes she spoke in a baby voice (this wab stuff is vewwy vewwy hawd to wearn) while giving me big doe eyes of helplessness. Even though the procedures were written down, she did not seem capable of checking them. We reviewed and reviewed and reviewed and it all fell apart by the next morning and we were back to Square One. I could not imagine her as a lawyer, and understood why she hadn’t been able to find much work in twenty-five years. (I’m sowwy, Judge, but what is a pwaintiff? I fowgot! I’m so stooooopid!)

By the middle of the week, I asked my nicer boss to speak with her about bringing a book since she wasn’t getting the hint from me. The next day Toodles arrived with a crossword. We took Pudding to the lab (I love how the air here sparkles! Can’t you just see it?) and I opened the door to find the lab seething with ants. She was in charge of cleaning the lab instruments while I did computer work, and she had put everything crusted in juice and muck back into the cupboards without washing it. This was despite four shifts of us doing it together, and it being written out very plainly in the procedures on her clipboard. CLEAN THE LAB EQUIPMENT BEFORE PUTTING IT AWAY.

I said patiently, “You need to clean the lab equipment at the end of the day. That’s very important.”
“My bad!” she squealed cheerfully. Her phone was pressed to her ear, and she was speaking to her husband in baby talk. “Did ‘oo have a snack? What did ‘oo have?”
After the Hair-on-Fire portion of the day, we settled in for the Sit-and-Wait portion. In relief, I took out my notes for Runemaster while she opened her crossword. For five minutes, it was silent save the whirring of the machines. Then she sighed.

I ignored it.
She sighed louder.
I ignored it again.
THUD.
I glared at my notes.
THUD-THUD-SIGH.

“I’m so BOOOOOOOOORRRRRRRRRRREEEEEEEEEEDDDD!” she whined.
And that was our second week.

[Gay Panda]

Didn't you find the short about cheating helpful? Now I know why it is better to tattle then to cheat. Gosh I hope I watched something like that when I was a kid and it some how got into my subconscious, I'd hate to think that I only just learned it.

I bought the video set of MST3K shorts!!! Cheating was on them, as well as two (yes, TWO) shorts on proper hygiene. I don't think that you can get these on Amazon . . . (pause while Gay Panda checks) . . . you can but they're too expensive . . . (pause while Gay Panda checks Youtube) . . . well, children, how you would like to watch a short on Keeping Clean and Neat? I think I'm going to put that on Pandaloonery right now if I can figure out how without Lady Friend.

[Gay Panda]

AAAAACK! I did it! I did a Magical Tech Spell without Lady Friend! I AM A GENIUS!!!

[Gay Panda]

AAAAACK! I did it! I did a Magical Tech Spell without Lady Friend! I AM A GENIUS!!!

And I owe it all to iodine.

[bloodorchid]

i knew that was coming hahaha

[Urban Forager]

I bought the video set of MST3K shorts!!! Cheating was on them, as well as two (yes, TWO) shorts on proper hygiene. I don't think that you can get these on Amazon . . . (pause while Gay Panda checks) . . . you can but they're too expensive . . . (pause while Gay Panda checks Youtube) . . . well, children, how you would like to watch a short on Keeping Clean and Neat? I think I'm going to put that on Pandaloonery right now if I can figure out how without Lady Friend.

Yes, Yes! Please let us watch a short on Keeping Clean and Neat! I've seen it before but I think I need to see it again.