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Thread: Primal Journal-deMuralist page 361

  1. #3601
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    athomeontherange is offline Senior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by demuralist View Post

    Today is my day to run and do errands. First the lawn before it gets too hot. Gotta mow. Then pull up some bushes and trim others so I can have the HVAC guy do a check up on my AC. Then gotta do a Costco run. Then I need to list and bag up DS's and DD's old clothes for donation. Then I need to clear my dining room table of all the clutter that has collected on it (mostly DS's high school things-so what to keep, what to donate, what to pitch) and the breakfast nook table of (mostly) DD's clutter.

    That ought to keep me busy for a while!
    You amaze me. How the hubs thinks you could add a full time job to all that is beyond me..LOL
    Karin


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  2. #3602
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    I think it is mostly because he sees me in the morning drinking my coffee in front of the computer and then in the evening drinking my tea, with my knitting, in front of the tv. All the action happens while he is at work! He has no idea how much time it all takes. There is also a good deal of stuff that I do that he does not see the results of (I plan it that way-he doesn't need to know everything I do, right?).

  3. #3603
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    lol.. true. I tell you, getting a full time job would really put a wrench in the smooth working of the house (that he seems to like since you do the yard as well as the house etc.)
    Karin


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  4. #3604
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    I think he is starting to figure it out, he has actually emptied the dishwasher twice in the past 2 weeks!

    Now I have to say that up to the point where I started working out side of the home, we had an agreement that I would do all of that as he worked 6 to 7 days a week, 10 to 12 hour days. the agreement was he would then pick up some of the slack, chore wise, when I started working. I feel sure that part may have slipped his mind.

    And to be fair, I am not a great house keeper, so "smooth working of the house" is sort of pushing the envelope of the definition of what I get accomplished.

  5. #3605
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    welll.. when I mean smooth, I guess I mean he does not have to step in much to help. LOL
    Karin


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  6. #3606
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    ok, I will take that, yes he doesn't do a thing! Funny, because we were talking about the fact that he will retire before I will, and that he will have to start the shopping and cooking and cleaning and by then we will likely have grandchildren and he will have to step in to help out there. It had him rethinking his retirement age, and mine!

  7. #3607
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    Gretchen of the book "Happier at Home" (same lady of happiness project) says people overestimate what they do and underestimate what spouses do. DH probably falls into that trap unintentionally because Chris does it well.

    In “unconscious overclaiming,” we unconsciously overestimate our contributions relative to other people. This makes sense, because of course we’re far more aware of what we do than what other people do. Also, we tend to do the work that we value. I think holiday cards are important; my husband thinks that keeping the air-conditioning working is important.

    Studies showed that when spouses estimated what percentage of housework each performed, the percentages added up to more than 120 percent. When business-school students estimated how much they’d contributed to a team effort, the total was 139 percent.

    It's easy to think “I’m the only one around here who bothers to…” or “Why do I always have to be the one who…?” and ignore all the tasks you don’t do. Also, when you add up the tasks that you do tackle, keep in mind that they may seem less important to someone else than they do to you. You think it’s important to clear out the garage, but this task may not seem as pressing to someone else.

  8. #3608
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    The thing I will say as to what DH does...he cleans up after himself 99% of the time. He never leaves things (clothes, dishes, parts from any projects he might be working on) laying around. And yes, a lot of what he thinks I do has a lot to do with what he thinks is important. He hates clutter, he doesn't like knick knacks or anything sitting on horizontal surfaces, but the floor would have to have a 1" layer of dirt before he would be bothered by it. Me, I do the floors on my hands and knees because I can't stand the stuff that would collect in the corners if I used a mop. When I clean a room I do ceiling to floor with the vacuum, but if pressed for time just move the clutter side to side. So I will often consider a room clean, even if it is not picked up. To him if it isn't picked up it isn't clean.

    So, when I lose 8 more pounds I will be back where I was in May 2012, my Fitbit tells me so. Unfortunately I won't make that by the end of May, but I should do it by the end of June. Then I will be onto "new weight" as many here like to see it.

    I am totally loving the 5:2. March 1 was when I started the experiment with ADF, then switched to 4:3, then to 5:2 and finally hit my stride mid April with the 5:2. Between March 1 and April 4th I lost 2.2 pounds. Between April 4th and May 17th I lost 10 pounds. That is almost 2 pounds a week average. Now I don't expect to keep that pace up, but oddly it has been pretty consistent. In other words I didn't lose a bunch in the first week and then taper off to 2 tenths last week. In fact, the week before last I only lost .2, but this past week I lost 2.8 with no conscious change in eating. So to those who are watching the scale, don't let the up swings discourage you.

  9. #3609
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    WOW!! I have to remember you have been at this longer than me. Watching your progress is inspiring.. I WANT THAT!!! I have to say I agree that there is no depriving and it feels natural.

    Oh.. I am also checking out threads on that link you sent me.
    Karin


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  10. #3610
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    I think that link really helped me a lot. There are so many on there succeeding even when they are "less than perfect". And to see all the versions of 5:2 and that they all still work once you find the one that fits your circumstances. It is funny to me now how opposed I was to even try any version of IF.

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