I am keeping another journal at myfitnesspal.com and have not been doing a very good job of keeping this one up. the other is more specifically about food and how it affects me, but doing both seems overkill some days.
I was thinking about something that was posted on RMS's journal, about goals and the roadblocks we put up. Honestly I cannot come up with the roadblocks. I have a mental block as to what I do to keep myself from following a plan that will get me to my goals.
My Long term goal relating to food is to eat local. This is going to take some work on my part, finding sources, etc. And it seems I am not committed enough to the goal to do the work, yet.
I know that food is like medicine it can either help make/keep me healthy or it can slowly poison me. My goal is obviously to go the healthy route. And most days I do, but I veer off the path just enough to keep me away from my weight goals.
My weight goal is not so much a number as a size/look I am after. I have never/will never look good in a pair of 5 pocket levi's, just too curvy, but that is ok, what I want is to look great in a pair of size 8/10 trouser style jeans with a white fitted button down shirt tucked in. Complete with belt, and sandals.
So then why is the scale number so important now? Well it is a fast easy measurement. Something that gives close to instant feedback. Fine, then let go of the emotional attachment and importance I have given it and use it as the tool that it is.
There is really not anything that I can think of that my weight keeps me from doing or being, including believing that I am an attractive woman.
My fitness level on the other hand, slows me a bit. I am working on that. I want to be able to do what I want and not worry about being able to keep up. I still do the treadmill every morning I am sticking with the 30 minutes and now slowly picking up the speed. I am picking up the amount of work I am doing in the garden and getting ready to start painting the deck.
I need to either get more hours at work or get another part time job, by the time my son goes to college at the latest. Sooner would make DH more comfortable. The roadblocks for this one are multiple. I know that what I do already is not going to be reduced just because I start working more hours and I am not thrilled about increasing my work load. Once DS is actually gone I will obviously have more time and will be more open to adding work. I also have no interest in taking just any job, I would like to do decorations for events (but not weddings-way too stressful!). Where I work now we are beginning to rent space for events and I am hoping we get enough going with that to increase my hours, perfect case scenario. Finding someone locally who could use some part time help would be choice B, and actually could work in addition to the first scenario, once no kids are in the house.
I think more than roadblocks I just have not started seriously along the pathway. Not doing things that will take me down the road to the destination. Gotta work on that.