HELLO! ::: pouncing on you :::
I so understand. I had one enormous fall off the wagon and it was months of struggle and misery to get back. The breakthrough for me was when I started working with a physical therapist and a personal trainer (they would gang up on me and double-team me!). I was so stiff and swollen and at my highest weight ever at that point. I HAD to resume eating primally, for the simple fact that I would be unable to do the PT guys when I was still inflamed from all the grains and crap. Even touching my toes was so hard to do.
Instead of going hardcore with CF or one-on-one with a trainer who WAY overdid it with you (and, yes, he did -- I am pissed at him), how about more of a middle ground .... something like group exercises at the gym? Do you like group exercise? (Probably so, if you tried CF.) I really do. It gives me some accountability and the structure that I so seem to need, and I'll admit it, I see other women's bodies changing before my eyes and my innate competitiveness kicks in.
I have a bunch of stuff to write! Ehhh, where to go next?
Keep coming back here every single day. Even if you are bingeing your ever living brains out. The community will help to hold you up.
"Let food be thy medicine and medicine be thy food." -- Hippocrates