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Thread: Anxiety, depression, laziness...Can the nameless wonder change? page 87

  1. #861
    drssgchic's Avatar
    drssgchic is offline Senior Member
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    Primal Fuel
    That is gorgeous! And way beyond my personal abilities

    Don't you hate it when you have a picture in your head but not all the pieces to make it work? I don't know about you- but when I know exactly what I need to complete the picture- there's no way I can find it. Every time.
    http://cattaillady.com/ My blog exploring the beginning stages of learning how to homestead. With the occasional rant.

    Originally Posted by TheFastCat: Less is more more or less

    And now I have an Etsy store: CattailsandCalendula

  2. #862
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    Weekend catch-up: candy bacon. So much bacon was had this morning, it was awesome. Impromptu partay was great, saw a friend from my last job that I haven't seen in forever and a day. Grown-up sleepovers (aka. trains stopped running) are fun. I had a triple whopper from BK, with the bun, almost finished it. Didn't feel any worse for it, though I have felt "off" all weekend (today probably dehydrated, though I handled my drink well). I felt the effects of OJ and a few pulls of soda on my gums, they were super irritated and kind of itchy. Hate that feeling, makes me worry a lot.

    I did work on my scooter! It's zippier, but something is off about the idle. I think the carburetor needs cleaning. That's for another day/weekend. I will probably start riding it after we're back from vacation, assuming the weather stays nice.
    Journal on depression/anxiety
    Currently trying to figure out WTF to eat (for IBS-C).

  3. #863
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    I had a cookie yesterday, it was delicious. I managed not to eat any in front of my guests, but they were hanging around and I was feeling peckish. My friends know I'm "doing that paleo thing" so it makes it easier for me to stay accountable and not cheat. I didn't have any of the pizza we bought for our guests. I did have some Haagen Dazs that we bought both Saturday and Sunday night. My teeth felt bad after the sugar (also had some goopy candy bacon, I think we had too much sugar and too low heat).

    Constipation: super constipated over the past several days, finally pooped last night. It was not pleasant. My stomach hurt about as much as it did when I overdid the coconut oil, but fortunately I didn't vomit this time. I'm going to add in some magnesium chelate in the evening at patski's suggestion.

    I'm leaving for Washington DC tomorrow morning so I probably won't be checking in on MDA at all (can't imagine trying to browse the site on my phone). I'm going to bring enough Tyrosine, C. Away, and one of my pill-based probiotics with me to last the week. I'm not going to stress if I don't take everything. I know I will allow a few non-primal foods, like the fries at Gordon Biersch, and probably some brews from local breweries. I realize these cheats may set me back, but I really just want to focus on having a good time this week and being stress-free. Oh yes, and because it promises to be GORGEOUS down in DC this week (mid-70s!), I'm not going to take Vitamin D, but I should bring a hat & sunscreen!

    I'll try to take lots of pictures and will share a link with y'all when I post them online

    Personal note: Not using oral contraceptives anymore, it's been a very difficult transition for Boyfriend and I to get used to condoms again. After resorting to the Plan B pill (thank the gods for it being accessible) too many times, it's time for us to really crack down on not messing up again and again. For the moods and flow concerns, I do not want to go back on hormonal BC, but I'm hesitant to go the Paragard route as I was once (prior to any BC, ages 13-18) prone to heavy flows. I'm going to talk to Boyfriend about my concerns with Paragard and see if we can make this work without. Apparently we don't have a lot of resolve when we try to mix mine with his, but my resolve is pretty damn good since going primal!

    Things I still need to pack:
    -supplements
    -deodorant stone
    -iPod & earbuds
    -Kindle
    -phone charger (also works for Kindle)
    -combination lock
    -camera battery charger
    -wallet
    -hat
    -sunscreen (might wait and buy it there)
    Journal on depression/anxiety
    Currently trying to figure out WTF to eat (for IBS-C).

  4. #864
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    Vacation is almost over and I have been back at home since last night. It was a really great week!

    Washington DC 2012 - a set on Flickr

    Truth be told, I stepped off the wagon for much of the vacation. It was liberating to not worry about food or my head and just get to enjoy Boyfriend's company and the absolutely gorgeous weather we encountered in DC. I also had some nice kitty-therapy time with my aunt's relatively new cats. My mood was up for the entire trip. There was only one day where I was feeling highly agitated, but it was mitigated with food. I did notice that my appetite was less reliable once I reintroduced wheat. Best part is that a couple of wheat-free meals and my body bounced back to my now-normal 120 lbs and no bloat. I've had more than enough french fries for a while though, thanks!

    If you're ever in DC, check out the Commissary just off 14th NW on P Street. All of their food is sourced from a farm in Maryland, including 100% grass-fed steak! I didn't get to try it, but we went there for breakfast twice and it was great. They cater towards the hipster, low-fat, vegetarian crowd, but still had plenty of paleo-friendly options (I didn't ask what kind of oil/fat they cook with, but if it's good, then they could advertise as paleo-friendly hehe). They even asked if we had any food allergies before they stepped away after taking our orders. I did not indicate any gluten intolerance for any part of the trip, opting to go with bread-free options when it was convenient, and living by don't-ask-don't-tell except for when I purposely went off-plan, such as for Ben's Chili Bowl (delicious, but frankly a bit awkward if you're white) and dessert at Coco Sala, a chocolate themed restaurant. GUYS. IT WAS SO DELICIOUS I CAN'T EVEN TELL YOU. I definitely felt when I had too much sugar, mostly when I had milkshakes, but that cocoa place. Gods. I would go again in a heartbeat if it wasn't rather expensive and rather far away. There's a picture of our tiny, but delicious, desserts in that album.

    The hostel we stayed at was quite nice and I intend on doing a full DC write-up in my blog, including places to go, how to get around, and keeping it cheap.
    Journal on depression/anxiety
    Currently trying to figure out WTF to eat (for IBS-C).

  5. #865
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    My, how times change. I have returned from vacation feeling very at-peace. Will it last? Most likely not, but for now, I am filled with contentment and these feelings are important, no matter how fleeting, because they indicate that I CAN change.

    My food anxiety significantly diminished over my January Whole30 and I feel that it is much less after my week off. My body is that much closer to where I'd like it to be strength and appearance-wise (I swear there are budding abs almost visible now). It is very satisfying to really be able to know that this journey has been effective for my peace of mind. This way of eating is becoming increasingly effortless for me, which includes not stressing about food (eating out is still somewhat anxiety-provoking because I don't like asking about what's used in the cooking process). My sense of hunger was a bit thrown off by the increased sugar intake last week, but I already feel much better than even before we left. I had an omelette this morning, no protein shake, and I feel like eating lunch in a few hours will get me through till dinner pretty comfortably. Maybe it won't and I'll be hungry all afternoon regardless, which has been the norm, but I think some carbs at lunch in the future might help with that. Learning = winning.

    I'm fairly certain that whatever candida overgrowth I had has been squashed at this point, based on no return of yeast-infection-like symptoms after last week's indulgences in wheat and sugar. At this point, I will continue with the supplements until I run out (and probably continue a maintenance level of probiotics) and probably start re-introducing some fruit whenever it's practical (in terms of budget). I don't think there's any need for me to be eating a sweet potato a day, as my accidental carb-cycling with a few servings of white rice and/or potatoes a week seems to have worked well to slim me down some more (averaging ~3 lbs every month or two, which is getting me very close to my past most-lean weight, except I have a little more muscle now). WHEN CAN I HAS TEH ABZ? More squats required for bootay too, I wants a firm butt.

    After a week of exploring and doing, my mind feels invigorated. I'm not feeling inclined to write, except for a massive DC-guide blog post, but my head feels good. I am content to avoid alcohol again for some time and hope Boyfriend will take a break for at least this week too. I am almost 1/2 way through my first day back and not feeling like finding a new job yet, so I'm hoping I can make this post-vacation contentment last a while, or at least keep it up enough to make it from event to event in terms of the various things I'm looking forward to.

    Things I'm looking forward to:
    -March 31 - starting on my tattoo!!!
    -April 6-8 - PAX East
    -April 10 - appointment with allergist (getting testing!)
    -April 14 - Boyfriend's birthday (I think I'm getting him a printer & Epic Mealtime t-shirt, his family will take us out to dinner most likely)
    -April 15 - Orthodox Easter (drinking & lots of meat consumption at my parents' house)
    -May 4 - heading down near Annapolis again (travel plans TBD) for my aunt's wedding, I'll be taking pictures for her.
    -May 15 - Diablo III
    -May 28 - 3-day weekend
    -June 18 - my birthday
    -June 20 - a mystery day that Boyfriend told me to remember.
    -July 4 - mid-week day off from work

    And, you know, every damn weekend as long as this beautiful weather continues The scooter is back on the prowl!

    Budget: My budget does not seem to have suffered much from the vacation. Boyfriend ended up covering most of the expenses since I covered the hostel and flights. I get paid 3 times this month so even with starting my tattoo, I should at least come out even
    Journal on depression/anxiety
    Currently trying to figure out WTF to eat (for IBS-C).

  6. #866
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    drssgchic is offline Senior Member
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    Welcome back! You sound great! (aren't vacations wonderful?)
    http://cattaillady.com/ My blog exploring the beginning stages of learning how to homestead. With the occasional rant.

    Originally Posted by TheFastCat: Less is more more or less

    And now I have an Etsy store: CattailsandCalendula

  7. #867
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    Yes they are. Can I go back? hehe

    Some things I forgot to ramble about...

    I'm feeling much more comfortably lately (even before vacation) about reading only what I want to around here. I started reading a lot of journals and realized that I was getting bored with them. I feel for these people struggling to stay on track, lose weight, handle binges, whatever it is, but reading all those journals everyday made me feel like I had to keep up with them and support these people. I don't have to. There are plenty of people around to help support them and that might actually have the answers, I don't have to stick around. It's a silly thing, but it made me feel good for realizing that I am able to step away from situations that might otherwise get me riled up. In the past it's been hard for me to stay away from things like that, or I'd get really pissed off about something that had nothing to do with me, even if I didn't say anything in the thread.

    My desk got re-positioned at work (not-boss wanted to bring in one of the IT guys to our cubicle cluster and I got the shaft). I love my new spot because I'm alone (it's a little quieter), and I'm close to a window! I'm totally getting a cactus now.
    Journal on depression/anxiety
    Currently trying to figure out WTF to eat (for IBS-C).

  8. #868
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    Hello! I have been primal for more than a year now, and also suffer from GAD & depression. I go through bouts of being on the forum & then not being on. I have been reading your journal, though I skipped several pages, and was wondering if you could summarize anything (supplement wise) that has helped your anxiety and/or sleep?

    I find I cannot do magnesium at all - it actually makes me much more depressed over time. I get rapid mood swings. I also am allergic slightly to 5-HTP (seasonal allergies pop up all of a sudden when they were fine before). Have been experiementing with DHEA at 5-10 mg lately and it has totally kicked my anxiety, strangely, although it is not without its other side effects. Was using it to help the sex drive but got this unexpected result.

    Look forward to following your journey some more~

  9. #869
    namelesswonder's Avatar
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    What about L-Tryptophan, SAM-e, or St. John's Wort? Those are all recommend supplements to try if 5-HTP doesn't work for you. 5-HTP helps me sleep and seems to boost my moods overall. I've never heard of someone having that kind of response to 5-HTP before, but I wonder if L-Tryptophan would not give you that problem (the two amino acids are similar but I can't remember exactly the difference).

    I'm taking 500mg of L-Tyrosine for anxiety in the morning. Some people take more, some people take it more frequently. I tried Ritalin once for focus (diagnosed with Executive Functioning Disorder, somewhat like ADD) and Tyrosine gives me a similar feeling in terms of mental clarity and focus as well. Check out "Depression-Free: Naturally" and "The Mood Cure" for more suggestions. I believe "Primal Body, Primal Mind" also has some supplement suggestions, but I haven't read that one. In "The Mood Cure", she mentions that some people don't find 5-HTP effective and use L-Tryptophan instead. The book is a little outdated, as L-Tryptophan is not difficult to get nowadays. It was once banned.

    I've read a bit about DHEA but haven't tried it myself. My sex drive is still iffy most of the time. Lately, when it shows up, it's full force, but my frequency of desire is still much lower than it once was. I am mostly just trying to give it time because it seems to be sorting itself out slowly but surely.
    Journal on depression/anxiety
    Currently trying to figure out WTF to eat (for IBS-C).

  10. #870
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    -Potential pull-up solution: Since the removable pull-up bar would not fit on my door frames, I should just use my hands! The trim at the top of the frame is 2.5" deep from the edge to the wall. There is a double-wide doorway from the living room to the dining room, so I will hold myself up on there at least a few times a week when I pass through. It hurts my fingers, but it's better than nothing. Obviously I must continue with my KB swings as well!
    -Last week my hands and feet were CONSTANTLY getting swollen. I had feeling of dehydration throughout the day as well. Looking this up, it seems to indicate that it could be thyroid-related, and/or not having enough/having too much sodium! I wonder what might be the easiest way to figure this out. Swollen extremities in hot weather has been a long-time issue for me, I just forgot about it until last week. Maybe I will look into getting a full thyroid panel after all. My potassium levels have been fine according to past blood work, so apparently that does not indicate any thyroid issues. Whatever, I don't know, it's just terribly uncomfortable!
    -I HATE EATING ON SOMEONE ELSE'S SCHEDULE.
    -I Google'd BJ's Wholesale and "pink slime", looks like they were using it, but will be discontinuing it in April. I don't really care, I need mah cheap meats. Apparently there is a grocery store in this area that has VERY cheap meat. I'm wondering if they also have more affordable organic meats, but it's a very busy store and I'm not sure when I could get to it.
    Journal on depression/anxiety
    Currently trying to figure out WTF to eat (for IBS-C).

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