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Thread: Anxiety, depression, laziness...Can the nameless wonder change? page 689

  1. #6881
    RittenRemedy's Avatar
    RittenRemedy is offline Senior Member
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    Well it sounds like the both of you are moving forward with things, even with the gluten and concussion. Teamwork or the power of Friendship and all that!

    Lol my medicine cabinet is looking a little weird at the moment too. God I hope I don't get any wise guys inspecting my room. What's... St. John's wort (started taking that in winter sometime to combat the SAD, still haven't finished it)? You got worts, RR? What're these hyurr jars? You sure have a lot of food (depends on the time of the week!). ... Is that bacon? Are you on body composition program? Please god no.

  2. #6882
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    I've never tried St. John's Wort, but sometimes I wonder if it'd be a good thing to take regularly to keep away sad feelz. This morning, it occurred to me that I am currently more down than I previously suspected. It'll pass, and hey, I'm sure I'll even feel better by the end of the week, but I just feel like I can't deal with this right now. My energy, focus, and motivation is needed elsewhere.

    I also wonder if Hulky would take it instead of Wellbutrin, esp. if it would mean he sleeps better. I'm tired enough of troubleshooting myself, i don't want to troubleshoot him too.

    No cycling today. I had no motivation for it this morning.

    My mood has continued to be bad enough that I didn't make myself lunch until this morning. There's some uncooked chicken in the fridge that probably needs to be thrown out. I made myself some banana-oatmeal cookies to eat for lunch and had two eggs for breakfast. Not much, I know, but I've got a banana in my work bag too.
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  3. #6883
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    Gut: After a month of perfection, the constipation is back, but not as bad as it used to be. I suspect that the lack of quality probiotic is the cause. I'll get the same NOW Foods probiotic that I was using before and try that again. I'd like to get a different one, but this one is the most affordable probiotic with SBO's. For now, I'm just trying to keep things moving with magnesium, 200 mg with each meal to see if that's enough. A hot drink seems to get things moving on most days, which never used to happen before (I'm taking it as a good sign). Another factor to the constipation may be the diatomaceous earth, but we'll see.

    Female issues: I've only had the IUD out for about 5 days, but I think there has been some improvement with the itch. It could just be a lull, that's happened before (and then the next week it's really bad). If the symptoms do flare up again, I'm going to make a mental note of the timing with my cycle. Last month, it was pretty bad right before my period, then improved during my period.

    I kept the IUD. I can take a picture of it if anyone's interested. I don't think I'll do anything with it, I just wanted to clean it and have it .
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  4. #6884
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    jenn26point2 is offline Senior Member
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    If you kept it, does that mean it can be reinserted if you find the IUD wasn't the problem with the itching? Or are those a one-time use thing, regardless of type?
    Primal since March 5, 2012
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  5. #6885
    namelesswonder's Avatar
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    You cannot reinsert an IUD, the doctor would not be able to confirm it had been properly sterilized.
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  6. #6886
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    Yesterday
    -Felt really constipated, gut felt awful. Tried drinking hot tea, but wasn't enough to make me go.
    -Took epsom salts (1 tsp, about 480 mg) before heading out to BBQ with friends.
    -Started to feel really sick on the hour-long train ride. Was moments away from puking when I got off the train.
    -Fortunately the breeze was cooler than the train had been so I was able to recover & walk to dinner
    -(trigger warning, suicide reference) Getting sick to my stomach scares me. I realized that it may be a subconscious connection to my overdose. Between the OD and drinking till sick in college, I don't think I got sick to my stomach. I can't remember having any bad stomach viruses in those years. I think part of me must link getting sick to the OD and the fear from that night comes back to me. When I'm drunk & get sick, my mind is too out of sorts to worry about the fear, but I do get really "needy". I don't think I've puked while sober in 10 yrs. I get hyper-sensitive when I'm sick, want to be touched but can't stand most contact because it feels all wrong. Hulky is used to handling illness solo, so he doesn't really get my feelings on this and he feels weird when I try to comfort him.

    BBQ dinner was good. On the way home, I told Hulky that I had felt like I needed to poop really badly when I was about to puke (I'm not kidding about how close I got, I even got the cough that always heralds puking for me). We figure I must have had some pressure in the wrong places after taking the epsom salts. Unfortunately, the urge to use the bathroom passed before we got to dinner, and afterwards, I couldn't poop.

    This AM, I took cascara sagrada. Now I know to use that in case of emergencies because it worked within an hour with little discomfort. My belly is feeling much better overall. I'll stick with the magnesium again and see if I can get the dose right. I'm getting Garden of Life Primal Defense (probiotic) in th ehopes that it will work the way the NOW foods probiotic with SBO's did.

    I slept terribly last night, both from the pressure in my stomach, and because we gave the cats free reign of the apartment. They yowled and chased each other three times, waking us both up. I guess we'll limit their interactions to daytime for now. We are reaching out to a friend for hopefully some assistance in trimming Pumpkin's claws. They are needle-sharp and the scratching post isn't helping enough. She doesn't sit still long enough for us to clip them without some guidance or assistance.

    Fatigue and no motivation = no cycling today. I'm trying not to feel guilty about that.

    It's been several weeks since my optometrist exam. Time to call the doc about my glasses. They should have been in by now. I've been having a much harder time reading things at a distance lately. I need to badger Hulky about looking on Coastal.com about getting new glasses because he is in even greater need for an updated prescription.
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  7. #6887
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    And since I'm still in slightly depressed mode, I gotta grump about my appearance for a minute.

    If I hadn't gotten my bangs trimmed in London, the front would be at a much more tolerable length right now. My options presently are continue growing them out (ultimately, I don't want bangs) or trim them so there's more of a contrast in length between the longest bits at the side of my face and the top of my face.


    I dyed my hair black twice: after the overdose in 2004, and early 2006. This must have been March of 2006 (based on the name of the photo, sadly Photobucket doesn't retain information about when the image was created or uploaded). I still have that same Chat Noir poster (now in the main bedroom at our apartment, I really want to get an absurdly ornate frame for it someday). Yes, that's a b&w photo of Peter O'Toole on my wall, I had a bit of a crush on him (and many other silverscreen actors). I basically want my hair to be this length before I dye it, but longer would be better. I want to be able to have a pink ponytail .


    If the front was this length, that would even be tolerable. Not sure how many months without a trim it would take to get there. Maybe two more months?

    https://www.dropbox.com/s/4eliqcjlm0...2016.46.02.jpg
    I just... I don't know. I felt so much more attractive with really short hair, but I still want long pink hair.

    https://www.dropbox.com/s/0i5dzrmkc9...2010.41.50.jpg
    Taken a couple of weeks ago.

    https://www.dropbox.com/s/zg6sc1hhkm...2012.15.13.jpg
    The back is a little longer now, though I had Hulky help me trim the longest bit so it's more straight (didn't want to get too mullet-y, but it still needs a trim).

    I mean, but just look at this cuteness.
    https://www.dropbox.com/s/bac2y8kdze...2014.09.15.jpg
    (from October).

    No answers for me, I know. I'm just...venting.
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  8. #6888
    namelesswonder's Avatar
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    At least my new glasses are ready! I'm going to pick them up after work.
    Journal on depression/anxiety
    Curing IBS-C with Vitamin C and magnesium citrate.

  9. #6889
    RittenRemedy's Avatar
    RittenRemedy is offline Senior Member
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    Much interwebs non physical hugs. Hope you feel better soon. Food and not enough poops is the worst. Usually I'll feel so sick I can't eat when it gets that bad.

    I take the primal defense probiotics as well. No idea if it's helping, but until it runs out I'm not willing to stop just in case. If I remover right, there are at lease some SBOs in it. You seem to always be one step ahead of me as far as gut issues go, so I'll default to what you feel I working!

    If it means anything at all, I think you're super cool. I look up to you at least. (OMG Internet confessions.) .W.


    The MDA drunk: drunk posting warning. Take seriously at your own risk. *hick*

  10. #6890
    namelesswonder's Avatar
    namelesswonder is offline Senior Member
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    Thanks. I do feel better since pooping this morning, at least physically . The NOW Foods probiotic w/ SBO's seems to have worked really well for me, I'm hoping Primal Defense does too. My concern however is that my gut doesn't seem to stay populated with these probiotics beyond when I'm using them. Time to try again with the potato starch, maybe, and only take the PS & probiotic on an empty stomach?

    Thanks drunk RR <3 Best disclaimer ever.

    Breakfast was 3 eggs scrambled in clarified butter. Lunch was plantain & oatmeal "cookies". The plantains were not quite all black, soft enough to mash with a butter cutter thing (used for scones?), kind of tasted like bland bananas. Adding any amount of sweetener probably would have tasted too sweet to me, so they were fine as is with the sweetened coconut flakes added. Dinner will be who the F knows, but I'm thinking sausages because they're easy.

    Sidenote: eating chicken lately, my hands hurt after. Too much PUFA? Would have to test with better quality chicken.
    Journal on depression/anxiety
    Curing IBS-C with Vitamin C and magnesium citrate.

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