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Thread: Anxiety, depression, laziness...Can the nameless wonder change? page 480

  1. #4791
    namelesswonder's Avatar
    namelesswonder is offline Senior Member
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    SCD Day 1

    Tonight, I'll pick up the milk to make yogurt, but I don't think I'll be able to make the yogurt until tomorrow evening. We'll see. I think I can use my cooler and some mason jars in hot water, in the oven, with the light on, in order to maintain the temp needed. The apartment is too cool now. I will replace the water at ~12 hours, or in the morning.

    Yesterday, I felt kind of mopey, but felt better once I got moving. I got to talk to Hulky once while he was on his way up. I'm not sure if he has internet up there, but he did text me when they'd arrived in the evening. I sent him a long email. I hope Coach will let us move in on the 31st, otherwise I'm going to have to rent a Uhaul overnight to store all our crap in a truck on the street. That would be stupid.

    I need to call my grandmother and ask her to visit her safety deposit box so she can send me a savings bond. I thought I had some, but I guess I used up the few that I had a couple years ago.

    How are we going to afford car repairs now?

    Gah, fuck money.

    I've got my carrot & chicken soup and some grape juice gelatin squares to eat today. I bought more peppermint tea yesterday as well as some ginger tea, and a thing of honey. Honey is allowed on the SCD, so I figured I'd give myself that little treat.

    My gut has been surprisingly good over the past few days. I haven't needed to take mag citrate!

    My brain has not been as good. I still don't need 5-HTP, though. I took it last night because I was feeling sad at bedtime, but I could tell it was unnecessary. I started composing a journal entry in my head and couldn't shut it off. I had weird and unpleasant dreams.

    The apartment is too quiet.
    Journal on depression/anxiety
    Curing IBS-C with Vitamin C and magnesium citrate.

  2. #4792
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    namelesswonder is offline Senior Member
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    My friend posted some teasers of the photos he took at our engagement party.


    D'awwww
    Journal on depression/anxiety
    Curing IBS-C with Vitamin C and magnesium citrate.

  3. #4793
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    naiadknight is online now Senior Member
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    I love that shot.
    Money sucks. Not having your main support system in easy reach when going through a major stressor doesn't help. Oddly enough, I think you'll come out the other side of this stronger. Moving for two while flying solo and juggling money/ life is a monumental leap for the anxious young lady ttht started this journal.
    As to money, as close as it is, why not eschew the moving van altogether (assuming Coach lets you in on the 31st)?
    "No fate but what we make"- Sarah Connor, Terminator 2
    Life is not a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, steak in one hand, chocolate in the other, yelling "Holy F***, What a Ride!"
    My Primal Battle Tome

  4. #4794
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    jenn26point2 is offline Senior Member
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    Congrats on the new apartment. Sorry you'll be moving all by yourself. Something tells me that between your family and Hulky's family, you'll have plenty of help with the physical aspects of moving.

    Good luck with the SCD. I'm interested in following this trial and can't wait to see how things work out for you.
    Primal since March 5, 2012
    SW: 221 | CW: 182 | LPW: 166 | UGW: 140 (80 lbs loss)




  5. #4795
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    namelesswonder is offline Senior Member
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    The apartment is literally a block away, I can see it from the front door of our current place. I think Coach will let us move in on the 31st, but if not, our stuff will need somewhere to stay overnight, hence the van. He is being accommodating enough with letting us pay last month's rent & security deposit when we get money back from our current land lady. BTW, I left her a letter in the mailbox yesterday & sent an email, so she's been officially notified, but won't be back/able to respond until she returns from a trip tonight. Nervous about her response. It's possible we'll lose our security deposit.

    I'm hoping to find a wheeled platform of some kind so we can roll the bigger stuff down the street. I should have plenty of help in the ways of cars to move boxes from friends and family and their cars.

    NK, you are very right. I feel very worried, but it's not like the anxiety that I have been crushed with in the past. I have a tangible obstacle and real situations to deal with. My emotional response is grounded in the reality of the situation. That is very relieving, for someone who has dealt with "false moods" (as The Mood Cure describes them) for such a long time. I am hoping that a good diet for the next few weeks as well as the visit from Venus this weekend (or next) will help me get through this.

    I'm going to take myself out to see The Mortal Instruments when it comes out. I have the book, but haven't gotten very far with it yet. $6 matinee <3
    Journal on depression/anxiety
    Curing IBS-C with Vitamin C and magnesium citrate.

  6. #4796
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    jenn26point2 is offline Senior Member
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    Why would you lose your security deposit??
    Primal since March 5, 2012
    SW: 221 | CW: 182 | LPW: 166 | UGW: 140 (80 lbs loss)




  7. #4797
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    namelesswonder is offline Senior Member
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    We did not notify prior to 30 days before end of lease (August 31, we haven't signed the new one yet but had said we would stay at current apartment when asked earlier this summer). MA renter laws. It's up to our land lady whether it's forfeit or not.
    Journal on depression/anxiety
    Curing IBS-C with Vitamin C and magnesium citrate.

  8. #4798
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    That's a great picture! Moving sucks. Just the thought of it makes me want to cry (but I'm moving across the country so it's worse in some sense). I hope your landlady lets you keep your security deposit!

  9. #4799
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    What a lovely picture.

  10. #4800
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    Quote Originally Posted by Pebbles67 View Post
    What a lovely picture.
    indeed makes even my cold heart get a touch warm.

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