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Thread: Anxiety, depression, laziness...Can the nameless wonder change?

  1. #4771
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    Increase in anxiety today, but thought that was probably more related to the diarrhea/upset gut. No headache, just light-headed from fluid loss. No doom and gloom, it's mostly the anxiety (worrying about everything going on this weekend). Allergies aren't any worse than usual.

    Most of my friends did daytime camps and/or organized sports. I was just never interested in either, I guess.
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  2. #4772
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    I never went to a sleep-away camp. I wanted to, but I guess we didn't really have the money either. Plus, my mom was crazy and probably wouldn't have let me anyway.

  3. #4773
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    Gluten-free day 13

    If I counted right, anyway. Tomorrow might be 13. Whatever, tomorrow I stop counting.

    I slept terribly last night. I guess I am worrying a lot about Hulky being away. It's going to be a rough 3 weeks. I could not fall asleep until around 3 AM. I joined Hulky in bed this morning after sleeping in the other room for a little while and then slept in until around 11, so I mostly caught up.

    Still not sure if we're moving. We have to figure that out today. The apartment is really, really nice. Rent would not go up AND it would have a washer & dryer. Gas heat should be cheaper and not to mention the new windows so we wouldn't be losing as much heat in the winter. My heart just isn't in this move. It's exciting to think about moving to a new place, even in the same neighborhood, but I'm not sure how well I'll handle the stress with Hulky gone.

    I can tell I lost water weight yesterday from the diarrhea. My abs are more visible. I'm working on hydrating today since I still feel a little light-headed.

    We saw Percy Jackson 2. It was pretty awful, the books are infinitely better.
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  4. #4774
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    imgur: the simple image sharer
    This links to a nice bra-fitting guide (how to measure yourself at home)
    Uh, I measured my boobs today and they have DEFINITELY grown. Thanks, Vitex? I measured at 30" underbust and 35" bust. For fun, I measured my waist too, which is also 30". Yay, long ribcabe. I'll never have a super defined waist, but it looks awesome anyway. Not really concerned about hourglass figures or whatever.

    The guide uses UK sizing, so I guess it's not that helpful for me. I mean, this says I should be a 32DD, if I'm rounding up. Definitely not.

    Bra Fitting - How to Measure and Fit A Bra
    Most of the general info I'm finding for US sizing is that I should be a 34A, which is what I was trying to wear before my boobs definitely grew. I just tried on my bras and lo and behold, they fit perfectly. They have NEVER FIT well. This is cool. I'm still going to continue this bralessness as much as possible, but good to know I have some fitted underwire bras if I need them! I might be able to wear a 32B or C, but I'll have to try on some to find out. Doubtful. I think the cups would be too close.
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  5. #4775
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    Okay, now I'm definitely going to try Vitex.

    Did you take it throughout the entire month or only during certain times in your cycle?

  6. #4776
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    Quote Originally Posted by diene View Post
    Okay, now I'm definitely going to try Vitex.

    Did you take it throughout the entire month or only during certain times in your cycle?
    I was diagnosed with low progesterone via blood test. It's supposed to be highest during ovulation, around a week before a 28-30 day cycle begins (period). I guess that day can vary for people, but mine was quite low and I've always been regular on a 28-30 day cycle. Anyway, my doctor told me to take it everyday for at least a few months. I just kept taking it once I began to feel the effects, about 1.5-2 months in. I haven't gone back for testing yet. I think someone posted something in YogaBare's journal recently about extended use for 9 months, which is accurate for me. I have not felt like it's doing anything for me lately, which could be from stress due to Hulky leaving, but I'm trying tapering off to see how the next month or so goes. I'll get my levels tested again when I can afford the bloodwork.

    Effects for me were: more energy (first noticed that I felt inclined to bound up the stairs instead of dragging myself), no debilitating depression the entire week before my period with the worst days being day before and day of period (this had only started sometime last year, which prompted the testing), and now a shorter period (5 days instead of 7). Also, a libido! Something that I sorely lacked for several years. I blame antidepressants and birth control pills.
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  7. #4777
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    I still wonder if a little vitex would help me in the libido department. Damn menopause!

  8. #4778
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    Tomi, get your hormones tested!

    Welp, I've made it two weeks gluten-free and now I want to start the SCD. I think today might actually be a prep day because I'm feeling pretty low with Hulky leaving (just left about 1/2 an hour ago). My parents invited me over to have dinner & hang out. My brother is getting home from camp today and I could do a little laundry, since their dryer got fixed. I kind of don't want to wash the sheets, but I really should.

    Yesterday was a pretty good day. We did a lot of driving to pick up the van that he's going to drive up to the field station today. We ate at a Denny's with his professor for lunch and a local Mexican place with the in-laws for dinner. Rice & beans leave me with hunger pangs. I am happy to leave those behind, moving forward with my diet plan.

    I am going to meet with our potential new landlord, Hulky's former soccer coach, sometime this morning to see if we can negotiate rent. He's a great guy, but I am still feeling super nervous and emotionally off balance. I am worried for how my emotional stability will fare for the next 3 weeks. Hulky has been telling people that I'll be fine, but I am pretty worried for myself. This will be the longest we have been apart (probably only a week before, maybe 2 when I was in school, but the relationship was less serious).
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  9. #4779
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    We are moving! Holy balls, I am nervous & excited.

    I'm tempted to start packing & cleaning today =P First, I must make chicken soup with pureed carrots for my meals for the next few days!

    Signing the lease tomorrow night. I think it's time to cash a savings bond =\.
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  10. #4780
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    SCD Day 1

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    Tonight, I'll pick up the milk to make yogurt, but I don't think I'll be able to make the yogurt until tomorrow evening. We'll see. I think I can use my cooler and some mason jars in hot water, in the oven, with the light on, in order to maintain the temp needed. The apartment is too cool now. I will replace the water at ~12 hours, or in the morning.

    Yesterday, I felt kind of mopey, but felt better once I got moving. I got to talk to Hulky once while he was on his way up. I'm not sure if he has internet up there, but he did text me when they'd arrived in the evening. I sent him a long email. I hope Coach will let us move in on the 31st, otherwise I'm going to have to rent a Uhaul overnight to store all our crap in a truck on the street. That would be stupid.

    I need to call my grandmother and ask her to visit her safety deposit box so she can send me a savings bond. I thought I had some, but I guess I used up the few that I had a couple years ago.

    How are we going to afford car repairs now?

    Gah, fuck money.

    I've got my carrot & chicken soup and some grape juice gelatin squares to eat today. I bought more peppermint tea yesterday as well as some ginger tea, and a thing of honey. Honey is allowed on the SCD, so I figured I'd give myself that little treat.

    My gut has been surprisingly good over the past few days. I haven't needed to take mag citrate!

    My brain has not been as good. I still don't need 5-HTP, though. I took it last night because I was feeling sad at bedtime, but I could tell it was unnecessary. I started composing a journal entry in my head and couldn't shut it off. I had weird and unpleasant dreams.

    The apartment is too quiet.
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