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Thread: Anxiety, depression, laziness...Can the nameless wonder change? page 473

  1. #4721
    namelesswonder's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by diene View Post
    I love to read my old journals. Reading them brings back so many memories so vividly! And even the stupid stuff becomes endearing when viewed from the perspective of 10 years later. I used to carry a journal with me everywhere I go. I wrote poetry in them and drew in them too. (I always got the kind without lines.) I'd like to start doing that again. Those journals were creative and emotional outlets, but I feel so dead inside now that I don't really even think I'll have anything to write about. Poetry and drawing? Forget it. God, how did I get this way?
    Lineless journals were my favorite as well. I had a couple of "sketch books" that I used as journals. I used to carry it everywhere too, that and my camera. I don't carry my camera that much anymore, since it's a D-SLR and a little cumbersome. I think I wrote poetry in my journals, but most of it ultimately ended up on my DeviantArt accounts. I downloaded it all before I deleted the old accounts, but I still have one that I don't really post in anymore.

    I have one "active" journal that I've been periodically using for the past couple of years. It's a really beautiful handmade leather journal. I feel guilty not using it . I don't want to leave it unfinished! I used to try and finish journals, but if I got to a turning point (end/start of school year, end of year, birthday) and was close enough to the end or just felt like it was done, I'd abandon it. I also had dedicated "scribble" (drawing) journals, but they were really depressing little sketches. I loved drawing in pen.
    Journal on depression/anxiety
    Currently trying to figure out WTF to eat (for IBS-C).

  2. #4722
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    That's both good and bad news regarding the 5-htp. I'm glad you don't feel like you need it anymore, but I was also going to see about sending mine to you. I have a bottle of 50mg and a bottle of 100mg that I'm not using. I wonder if Paula would like them.
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  3. #4723
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    Sorry I can't be the amino acid dumping ground right now I'm holding onto my leftovers just in case. Hopefully, I won't need them for a while.

    Thoughts for August supplements:
    -continue with B12, Iodine, Vitamin D, Vitex in water every morning (get B12, Iodine, and D tested at annual, maybe hormones before September's cycle)
    -Aloe juice/gel (the edible kind, obviously) in the evening
    -Magnesium, if needed for constipation or sleep aid
    -L-Glutamine for gut health
    -Digestive enzymes at start of each meal
    -N-ascetyl cysteine 2x daily on empty stomach, per a SIBO protocol

    I am hoping the NAC will replace the peppermint oil in eliminating/reducing bloating & gas. I still get gas in the morning (but I'm having starches with dinner) and after meals, but less than before I started with the peppermint oil capsules. The recommendations I've read say to take it for 1-2 months only, not sure why =\.
    Journal on depression/anxiety
    Currently trying to figure out WTF to eat (for IBS-C).

  4. #4724
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    Gluten-free day 5 & 6 days w/o amino acids

    The title is not entirely accurate. I had Theanine Serene earlier this week, but I'm just talking about L-tyrosine and 5-htp now.

    Sleep
    -Slept fine. Magnesium seems to be enough for now. Not even sure I need it for sleep, but I do need it for mah gut!

    Food (yest.)
    -peppermint tea w/ hydrolyzed collagen
    -Banana & apple w/ almond butter, 3 plain hard-boiled eggs (uggghhhh)
    -Threelac*
    -Bunch of medjool dates
    -Chocolate chip gluten-free pancakes, a bunch of bacon (half a pack), part of a frittizza (pizza frittata) that Hulky made w/ cheese and pepperoni.

    *I took the Threelac out of curiousity, before I knew what Hulky was doing for dinner (breakfast for dinner). I didn't take a peppermint oil capsule before eating, but I did take digestive enzymes. I don't know of the PO would have made a difference, but an hour or two after eating, I had to run to the bathroom and let it all out. Factors: Threelac, too much fat, no peppermint oil? I want to try the Threelac again, but probably not till next week since I don't want to mess up travel tomorrow night and I don't want to get dehydrated this weekend.

    I cut up a melon last night and forgot it! Gr! I guess I will bring some up to Maine since I don't think I'll finish it today and tomorrow

    Body
    -I did some sun salutations last night and this morning. It felt really good for my back! Nice and stretched out. I showed Hulky how to do it when I got the hang of the breathing too. I think I make a poor yoga instructor. Now that I've broken the ice and done those salutations, I hope to continue doing them at least every morning.
    -I've gotten kind of complacent about cycling. I'm not pushing myself to improve anymore. I can make the trips and that's enough. I'm not sure I'm happy with that. Wouldn't it be nice to be faster?
    -[I was going to write about the effect of something I took or ate? maybe? I forget now]

    Fae
    -I asked Hulky if I should borrow the scale to check Fae's weight while I'm going back & forth from my parents' house this week. He said no, she's fat, but she's our fatty. There's no need to know. How is he so good at this? He's right. She's fat, but seems otherwise healthy. I have no idea if she's losing fat. She can jump up onto the window sills and climb up onto the beds, so that's enough. I think the temptation to weigh myself would be too much anyway.

    Our rash guards came! Hulky's has very long sleeves & torso, but it fits well otherwise. Mine has very long sleeves, but fits well. We look sexy in them Maybe I'll try to get a picture when we go up to the beach this weekend. I'm also planning on looking for some clothes at Reny's when we go into town. Skirts/dresses/pants, or whatever I can find. I need things that fit and I feel comfortable wearing. Hulky needs some things for this field course in northern Maine. A good wide-brim hat, some water shoes, maybe new sneakers at the very least.
    Journal on depression/anxiety
    Currently trying to figure out WTF to eat (for IBS-C).

  5. #4725
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    Hey Wonder...

    Regarding Fae, have you considered building her a cat tree in your apartment to encourage more muscle use rather than worrying about weighing her. It's pretty easily done with some 2x4 pieces/scraps, maybe one whole piece, some scraps or cuts of plywood (if you spot a tossed out dresser or desk the drawers can actually make nice little sitting cubbys and the materials are usually light, plus they can be pulled apart for salvageable materials), and some of those carpet end cuts that are really cheap which you just trim down and staple on with the seam on the back towards the wall.

    Then encourage her to do some vigorous climbing kind of regularly with a feathery thing or something like that she likes.
    Of course if you put it in front of a window, or make an arm of it stick out near the top of the window she'll love that and be more apt to climb regularly. Cats looooove to look out over things from up high.

    It might be a fun project for you and Hulky to collect the parts on the cheap and build her a little climbing castle.
    Last edited by cori93437; 08-01-2013 at 08:54 AM.
    “You have your way. I have my way. As for the right way, the correct way, and the only way, it does not exist.”
    ~Friedrich Nietzsche
    And that's why I'm here eating HFLC Primal/Paleo.


  6. #4726
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    She will jump up onto this thing from time to time. I bought it from a co-worker.

    DSC03347_0003 | Flickr - Photo Sharing!

    She was going crazy in that photo because we rubbed catnip into the top When we entice her with strings, she doesn't leap for it for very long and eventually just lays on the floor and waits for you to come close enough. Building her something to climb on would be cool, and the desk idea is interesting... Will have to look at some photos and see what kind of ideas we get.
    Journal on depression/anxiety
    Currently trying to figure out WTF to eat (for IBS-C).

  7. #4727
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    Sounds as if the gluten free thing is going well. I am watching you aminos experiment with interest. I have cut down. I absolutely love Theanine Serene for calming me for auditions etc.

  8. #4728
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  9. #4729
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    Ha! I knew there must be a link for this sort of thing out there somewhere.

    My poor college friends were doing this back in the late 80's and early 90's out of scraps and found pieces of off-cast furniture.
    The poor college philosophy students(and such) I hung out with were a pretty cool bunch, liked their cats, and needed all their pennies for substances and alcohol. All this lead to creating some pretty cool kitty towers from "things". LOL
    “You have your way. I have my way. As for the right way, the correct way, and the only way, it does not exist.”
    ~Friedrich Nietzsche
    And that's why I'm here eating HFLC Primal/Paleo.


  10. #4730
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    Gluten-free day 6 & 1 week w/o amino acids

    PrimalCon New York
    I am worried about losing my gluten-free streak this weekend. It's easy to say "just this once". It doesn't become anything more, usually, but the point is to be 100% compliant in this regard right now. If I can't do it for 2 weeks (my goal right now), how can I manage this for the rest of my life? It's not worth the joint pain. My family won't be pushy about this, it's just my own desires. I'll just have to do my best to eat adequately so there's no room for temptation.

    Food (yest.)
    -Peppermint tea w/ hydrolyzed collagen (I wonder if gelatin would be more filling)
    -Banana & apple w/ almond butter, pork chop w/ green beans, some almond butter solo because I was hungry later
    -Bunch of medjool dates and several slices of cantaloupe
    -Pork chop & roasted russet potatoes
    -Bit of dark chocolate

    I had a BM after lunch, probably from the almond butter (I should probably not be eating it at all, but I got the jar as an indulgence and have been enjoying it thoroughly). I only took mag citrate at bed time. I will take it at every meal & before bed today. Gotta make sure all my supplements get packed up to come to Maine with us tonight! Having a bunch in liquid form is so easy. All I have to do is chug a bit of nasty-flavored water in the morning & I'm all set

    Body
    -My knees still hurt when doing lunges and cycling sometimes. I think it's just working them though, nothing from inflammation. No cycling today due to rain.
    -My hands started to hurt after eating a little dark chocolate last night. I already knew it was bad for my gut, but I guess it's no good for the rest of me too. I'm throwing the last little bit out.
    -I was reading a paleo page about SIBO and it reminded me of the Specific Carbohydrate Diet. I just ordered the book, should be here next week. I can start to implement it while Hulky is away. It's going to be hard going back to "potatoes for him but not for me". Sweet potatoes are not okay for SIBO, but squash is.

    Sleep
    -I've been getting to bed a little late this week, but still feeling okay despite that.

    Brain
    -So far still so good without the amino acids. I guess my body was ready to be done with them? I'd been feeling more anxious lately and wasn't sleeping well, so I stopped taking them and now I feel "normal" without them. It's been about 10 months since I started taking them regularly again. Maybe it was one of the other supplements I started recently that helped set things straight? Magnesium? No clue! I just hope this lasts!
    -I am still dealing with some anxiety, but it's very recognizable when it occurs and I am able to squash the response. It's just a habit, not a real feeling.

    This day can't go fast enough! I want to get up to Maine! We're going to stop at a Barnes & Noble on the way up to buy Hulky a book. I'll be bringing one or two that I started a while ago and never finished. Looks like chance of rain, low 70's tomorrow, but we'll still enjoy some beach walking. I need to remember to bring a hat for each of us! My sunburn is finally gone from last weekend, Hulky's is still healing, and I don't want more!

    Venus wants to hang (well, so do I) the weekend of the 17th. I'd love to go down and visit her in CT but...with our budget things the way they are right now, it'd be more manageable for me if she could come here. She said it's up to me. I don't know why I'm feeling guilty about asking her to come here. I want to figure that out.

    Anybody else feeling like fall is fast approaching? I'm in the mood for sweaters, hot drinks, and leaf crunching.
    Journal on depression/anxiety
    Currently trying to figure out WTF to eat (for IBS-C).

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