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Thread: Anxiety, depression, laziness...Can the nameless wonder change? page 322

  1. #3211
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    geostump is offline Senior Member
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    I like "Hulky" better than "Fiance". It's strong, yet cute without being too cutesy.

  2. #3212
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    Busy morning. File servers are down and our office utilizes them heavily. Nothing I can do except try and get in touch with people, and coordinate, as usual. Frustrating. I don't like not having control over everything!
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  3. #3213
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    Holy Cow - how did I get 5 pages behind in your journal? I was just here yesterday morning!

    I skipped a few pages so sorry if this has been said............ AWESOME Gram's place! and sweetie - you could park a HUNDRED cars on either side of that driveway!!! why are you worried about parking?

    And here's my advice on wedding stuff............. spend the BARE MINIMUM! Go to a Justic of the Peace for heavens sake - have a potluck reception with family and close friends....... and use the money you would have spent on a ONE DAY event - and put it towards you're future together. Buy a house - or save for something else. Wedding days are nice to remember - but they don't make the marriage.

    Thats my humble opinion.
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  4. #3214
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    Quote Originally Posted by tomi View Post
    Holy Cow - how did I get 5 pages behind in your journal? I was just here yesterday morning!

    I skipped a few pages so sorry if this has been said............ AWESOME Gram's place! and sweetie - you could park a HUNDRED cars on either side of that driveway!!! why are you worried about parking?

    And here's my advice on wedding stuff............. spend the BARE MINIMUM! Go to a Justic of the Peace for heavens sake - have a potluck reception with family and close friends....... and use the money you would have spent on a ONE DAY event - and put it towards you're future together. Buy a house - or save for something else. Wedding days are nice to remember - but they don't make the marriage.

    Thats my humble opinion.
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  5. #3215
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    I need to see the driveway in person to try to visualize cars, but it's not as long as you are imagining. Half of it is lined by trees, with no room on either side for parked cars. The areas next to grass have some shrubbery or a slight dip that would either make parking dangerous or impossible. We could park SOME cars, maybe, but I also don't really want them visible in photos, you know? I didn't really consider keeping the ceremony totally separate from the celebration. Maybe we could do a small thing with the JoP and family the day before, and then big party with friends & family the next day (on a Saturday). That would mean people could park behind the house (I *think* the ground is clear enough for a route back there) and leave the front areas open for food and milling around. That's assuming it hasn't rained recently and the ground isn't totally soaked!

    Therapy was great today. It felt good to talk about how nutty (and awesome) the last couple of weeks are, knowing how well I've handled it all. I haven't had much time to really process it. I will probably start to pick it apart next week. This weekend is all about wedding plans! I have therapy again next Friday because she's gone on the 15th. Kind of hoping she's gone on the 22nd too (she's not sure yet) so I don't have to pay for therapy 3x in one month. Then again, I could just say I don't want to go and I'm sure it would be fine.

    I got to gush about my engagement and wedding plans to a co-worker today. I took a long lunch to do it, and it was just what I needed to keep my head in good working shape for the rest of the day. She sympathized with my sister-quandaries so that was nice . We haven't chatted about non-work stuff that much before, but she is really open to those kinds of conversations with everyone. Plus, I'm sure she'll spread my engagement around the office so that'll be nice. The company director knows now, but my supervisor doesn't haha. Not that they need to until I'm going to take days off!

    My mom offered to buy us a washer & dryer that was listed for $100. So I'm guessing that's about her budget range. I found another listing (because we waited too long for the last one) on Craigslist today. They look old, but hey, if they work for a year or two, that's enough. We're tired of lugging our laundry around to our parents' houses! And I'm sure future-FIL would be willing to help keep them running, as that's what he did with their old washer & dryer (downstairs neighbors at their house now use that set) for many years. So useful having a jack-of-all-trades around.

    Hulky and I are probably going to see a movie tonight. We used to go to movies a lot, then we were struggling with money and stopped for a while. We both feel better when we set aside enough for a movie or two every month. It's just a nice way to squeeze in some together time and a "date" mentality with minimal planning and effort. I think we're going to see Hansel and Gretel, which got terrible reviews, and looks awesome. If it's on par with Van Helsing (with Hugh Jackman), or the Underworld movies, I will be pleased. I think I will suggest that we prioritize certain films (and how often we order out) moving forward to save a little cash each month for the wedding. Money that would've gone towards a movie or to ordering out will instead go into savings.

    My toes are looking minimally better. I stay barefoot for as long as possible in the morning, but I'm usually too uncomfortable to do that in the evening (several hours barefoot in the cold as opposed to one? I think not). Gotta make sure they have good ventilation! They usually feel uncomfortable by the end of the day, from being in socks & shoes all day long. I should air them out tonight & use some more of the silver ointment.

    Fae: I've started to keep the chicken thigh pieces a bit larger and she works her way through them. Thick strips, instead of little chunks. I think this will be good practice for just giving her a piece of meat, uncut, for her to gnaw her way through. The back/neck pet food from WF has a varying amount of small bone pieces, so I'm not worried about her getting bones in her diet for right now. I think I might get a game hen next week and cut it up (including the bones) for her to try.

    I decided that if I can find some good minimalist shoes on sale at TJ Maxx in my size, I'll splurge and buy them. Every time I go to Whole Foods (usually once a week), I'll swing by to look. I've seen Merrell's there one or twice, and VFF's once (not in my size).

    Body: I did a little this morning and I think a little last night. Forgot last night's, but I'm trying to log everything into Fitocracy. There is a deal on Living Social right now for $50 to do the New England Spartan race in August of this year. I'll talk to Hulky about it tonight. It's a bit much to spend right now, but I think the two of us could do it. It would be a good fitness goal for me, to get through 3 miles of obstacles! Starting to run is my biggest setback really, because I despise running.

    TMI: I had some hints of yeast issues this morning. Probably from eating a huge bowl of the last of the rice cereal (in rice milk) last night. I'm going to pour out the milk tonight. The ice cream is gone, so I think I"ll be okay keeping away from the sugar. Reeeally important that I do that considering the antibiotics. I think they are helping minimally with the digestive issues, so I'm keeping my fingers crossed that the SIBO test comes back with some good results. Also, my boobs have shrunk a little again, but are still super tender.
    Journal on depression/anxiety
    Currently trying to figure out WTF to eat (for IBS-C).

  6. #3216
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    It just occurred to me- is there anyone that will be driving up for the wedding that owns a van? Just tell the guests to get friendly with each other and stuff them in that to go from the B&B to the wedding. Cheap and entertaining
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    Originally Posted by TheFastCat: Less is more more or less

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  7. #3217
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    No van owners, except for C, who has a new project car. Previously, it was a '77 VW camper bus with a pop-up tent. Now I'm not sure the "new" one has a pop-up tent. Anyway, only enough room for 3-4 passengers. Some of my school friends will be able to commute.

    As it is, we're looking at over 60 guests now, and it might grow, depending on how we figure this stuff out. We're going to spend time talking about wedding stuffs tonight.
    Journal on depression/anxiety
    Currently trying to figure out WTF to eat (for IBS-C).

  8. #3218
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    I think we're scrapping the BBQ idea and going with casual BBQ catering. I still want to make the ceremony work at my grandma's, but we're looking into venues with indoor/covered options for the reception. Obviously cost goes up for that, but I'm sure we can find ways to save. Maine is not super expensive, either.

    We are thinking of doing a dessert table instead of just straight-up cake, that way friends can contribute their favorite candies or bring pies/cupcakes etc. We may still do a smallish wedding cake for us and the families.

    Hulky wants to do first dance and really wants to have a best man. Sigh, we'll figure that stuff out later. It's really the ceremony stuff that gives me a lot of anxiety.
    Journal on depression/anxiety
    Currently trying to figure out WTF to eat (for IBS-C).

  9. #3219
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    I realized that my anxiety is probably tied in with the hormonal crap that's been occuring lately. First, it was from the EC, now, it's probably from shark week! It unexpectedly started yesterday. I am hoping that my anxiety and moods will level out a little in the next couple of days.

    Hulky and I saw some of our friends last night when we went out to dinner & saw Hansel & Gretel (it was really really really awful, but we had fun). They were all super excited about our engagement. Aside from H's family, that's been the first in-person response we've had about it other than from my therapist (she was super excited for me). Co-workers don't count because I'm not friends with any of them. It was great .

    We really need groceries today but it's going to be nutty with the Superbowl on. Sigh. I guess I'll head out shortly and pray that I can pick up some frozen veg, meat, and sweet potatoes!

    My sister told our parents about her own engagement yesterday. I kind of want to pop by today and ask them how they're doing =P.

    I have a TMI wedding related question (skip this paragraph if you don't want menstrual talk). I think I will take it to Google. Basically...I'm really hoping that charting my very regular period (
    Journal on depression/anxiety
    Currently trying to figure out WTF to eat (for IBS-C).

  10. #3220
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    I guess I forgot to finish writing that post. I forget what I wanted to say now.

    I got out yesterday AM and snagged groceries quickly. I knew what I wanted, bagged as I went, and scanned with the remote device that our Stop & Shop has. My check-out process was about 5 minutes, 4 of which was waiting for the guy in front of me to enter in his veggies. I made some good savings with a few coupons, too. Except for eggs & the occasional special purchases (bacon), we are only spending about $35 on groceries every week! Okay, maybe more like 50, but that's still great. We're going to need that money! Hulky and I discussed a few ways to save money outside of the actual wedding events. We'll keep our movie habits, but limit them to the local theater (cheaper), only go twice a month, and limit our ordering out on Fridays to every other Friday. It helps us stay happy to have those little things to do. When we don't do these things over a month, we'll put $20 each in a jar.

    Hulky & I are going to try to have our parents meet at dinner at our favorite Mexican place within the next couple of weeks. And we are looking into having an engagement party within the next 2 months!

    I had rice with dinner last night, since Hulky cooked. Catered breakfast at work this morning is bagels. I was trying to get in to work early so I didn't eat breakfast, figuring they'd have some eggs & sausages. Oops. I had some of the fruit from the fruit bowl (melons and some berries), but I know I'm going to be ravenous by the afternoon. I guess I could pick up a rotisserie chicken at Shaw's during lunch and nibble at that. That would get me through a couple of lunches. I wish dairy was an option, otherwise I'd totally go for some cottage cheese or a block of cheddar to nibble on!

    Mood/brain is pretty good. Shark week became shark moment. Weird. I'll blame it on the EC again. Not complaining! I'm curious about the anxiety I've been having lately. I feel like being anxious on the weekend could just be my body/brain not relaxing after stressful weeks at work, but I'm also wondering if there's something else at play. I didn't take Tyrosine yesterday and felt fine. I am not taking it again today. My brain feels sluggish this morning, but I think with a few good nights sleep, I'll be okay. I think I just need some time to recover from the really crazy work stuff that's been going on. It's almost over. Today is the official last day for some of it, but I know there is more to work on.

    Hulky and I are looking into getting a joint account at a credit union. He wants to get away from our current bank and I will probably move with him (we haven't talked about separate accounts, but I assume we'd each still have them). My company is based in CA so their credit union deals don't work for me. Hopefully we can get some ideas of who to look into from co-workers and local family.
    Journal on depression/anxiety
    Currently trying to figure out WTF to eat (for IBS-C).

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