My cousin in Germany just got married in Nov and kept her maiden name.
Another German cousin took his wife's name years ago - he had an awful home life and wanted nothing better than to ditch the moniker.
The other two German cousins went with the husband's surname.
I wanted to keep mine when I got married, but then found out just HOW TRADITIONAL my hubby actually is - he really, really, really wanted me to change it to his. Nineteen years on, I wish I had stuck to my guns or researched some other options. I still like the hubster, and am no raging feminist, but why is it always the gal who has to change in favor of the guy??
And as long as you aren't naming any future kids something completely daft, and explain why you chose the names you did, they will be fine.
This is a wee sore point with me, because hubby's family is arch traditional, while I am a lot more independent and all. Hubster got his traditional church wedding and the whole nine yards, but I look back on that day with a "blech" kind of feeling - the bride went through all the motions but really got nothing out of it except to make the Traditional Family smile. I really hope he doesn't try to plan a wedding anniversary party for any of those Big Number annos - I know I will hate it. I plan to kill that kind of talk, should it occur, with some comment on spending unnecessary money, which should do the trick - hubster is a good saver.
Anyway, nameless - take all the time you need to figure out what is important to you - traditional, modern, own-creation, etc. - and compromise with the guy if you have opposing viewpoints, but do not give in if it is not what you need. Married names last a long time... (Or, in a perfect world, they would).
Last edited by Crabbcakes; 01-22-2013 at 06:50 AM.
I have a mantra that I have spouted for years... "If I eat right, I feel right. If I feel right, I exercise right. If I exercise right, I think right. If I think right, I eat right..." Phil-SC