Anxiety, depression, laziness...Can the nameless wonder change? page 260

[namelesswonder]

Woke up depressed. I slept really, really poorly. Boyfriend & his bro were chatting in the other room, but even with an earplug in (sleeping on my side), I couldn't sleep till Boyfriend came to bed. I stayed in bed till around 11:30AM this morning.

Since they are sleeping off hangovers, it doesn't look like the Mustang is getting any attention this weekend. I don't think I'm going to be going food shopping either, so my broccoli-free week is on hiatus. Maybe I'll make some cocoa.

[drssgchic]

Cocoa would be a good start.

Congrats on your pre-engagement!

Since you're not interested in a traditional wedding, you could go to the courthouse and sign the documents with important people (family, special friends) as witnesses, and then go to your grandma's for a massive potluck. You provide the roast animal (and probably the cake), and have your guests bring a dish of whatever. Cheap, fun, memorable!

My wedding shindig- should I have one- has evolved to the point of telling people to bring tents for camping out in my parent's yard for the weekend.

Oh! For my mom's cousin's second wedding they did a period wedding- and asked all the guests to come in costume! Mom had a blast planning her late 1800s costume

[namelesswonder]

Feeling queasy. Probably the coconut milk in my cocoa. Ergh. Wish Boyfriend would get up so I could snuggle (he needs to shower, the Tequila stench is overwhelming).

I found ou

E, you reminded me that this can be incredibly simple. I like the idea of keeping the ceremony to ourselves or just closest family and then gathering after. That would make planning easier, since I could delegate non-ceremonial folks to prep the reception while we're signing stuff. I wonder what the inside of Bath city hall is, it looks pretty cool on the outside.

The hardest part (rather than financials) might be convincing Boyfriend that we can do whatever the fuck we want with this. I think he wants to, but every now and then, he talks about stuff like having 5 groomsmen and I don't want a wedding party.

[drssgchic]

Well when he gets fussy tell him the wedding is for the bride and he's supposed to be smiling and nodding when you tell him how it's going to be

[namelesswonder]

Sleep: I was in bed before 11 and asleep fairly quickly. I woke up when Boyfriend came to bed, but I don't think it took me long to fall back asleep. I definitely still need to catch up on sleep. I took my time getting ready this morning. I'd really like to go back to bed right now.

Food: I scrounged yesterday. I googled the right way to eat/open a pomegranate (score and tear) and finished off half of the seeds. I have the other half to pick at while I'm at work today. I did not make applesauce yesterday and if I don't do it tonight, I'm probably going to chuck the apples. Then I'll feel really guilty for wasting free apples. So I really want to do it. We ate out yesterday and I straight-up broke my Whole30. That cheese was fucking delicious, man. I also had "white rice", which was not white at all, and had a little corn in it. It was all in some kind of Mexican salad (it was like a shrimp fajita salad, basically). I'm not planning on breaking the Whole30 again until Christmas. I'm not taking any chances with my gut. Boyfriend seems more understanding lately of my frustration with the gut issues and the necessity of keeping on track. He did not sound frustrated when he asked me if there'd be something I could eat there (our favorite Mexican place). I think that kind of made me more inclined to be lenient, which, right now, is not necessarily a good thing.

Supplements: Still sticking with 200mg of 5-HTP. I won't really know if that's an okay dose until I catch up on sleep. MWF for first two weeks of my cycle (today starts week two), 1000mg of Maca Root in the AM. MWF going forward, no Tyrosine MWF. Everything else (Pau D'Arco 2x twice daily, Oil of Oregano 2x twice daily, multi, 12000IU Vit D, 2g Vit C every 4 hrs, Vitex 1x daily, Inositol 2x daily) is the same. I didn't use the neti pot yesterday, but did today. It's wet out and I can feel a lot of pressure in my head. My ear has been hurting intermittently too. My eyes have been really itchy lately.

Body: I haven't been doing push-ups, but I did some quick stretches yesterday and my leg feels better again. I really want to keep this up for the rest of the week and see if it continues improving. I can feel a stretch in my right glute when I walk, so I can tell it's doing something. I'm giving myself more time before I see the gut doc again, just want to see if anything else changes since I was able to suddenly reduce the Vitamin C recently. It coincides with increasing the dose of Vitex and anti-fungals. I'm hesitant to take more capsules, but want to see if increasing one of those results in more changes.

Brain: Sleepiness is making me a bit less coherent than I'd like. It's early yet, so we'll see how the rest of the day goes.



I did decorate the tree, but I'm not finished yet. I'll get a nicer picture of it before it dies.

[Pebbles67]

Glad you got some sleep. I consider the W30 a way of eating, not necessarily 30 days in a row. Keep it up.

[namelesswonder]

More and more, I've been realizing that it's all just a WOE for me. Sometimes it changes, but if I was still eating SAD, I wouldn't say that I was breaking a diet because I ate something out of the ordinary. It's not like I ate cake everyday back then (okay, sometimes I did), so it's not really a big deal if I have something like that now. I'm glad my brain is moving out of "diet" mode because it never needed to be there.

[jenn26point2]

Ok, I will rejoin the Whole30 til Christmas since you're still in... Except, lunch does contain dairy... both butter and cream and parmesan cheese... wow... major dairy bomb! lol OH, and brown rice... shit, quadruple-threat! Oops. Oh well. Dinner is steak on the grill that magically started working again when Brad fired it up... you know how it goes - call a mechanic and the problem goes away...

So many things to comment on...

PM me if you want a holiday card (I'll shoot for before New Years, but I might need to make up a random Holiday for it) from me and don't mind sharing your name/address . I never send out holiday cards, but I might ask Boyfriend if he'll sign a few with me to send to family, since we're both just baking (me: applesauce, him: gingerbread cookies, which may or may not be carved into obscene figures with my artistic skills) for other this year. You guys are special to me and I'd love to send a little snail-mail affection to anyone who wants it.

Absolutely!!

Oh yeah! More fun making up my own though. I never sent Thank You cards as a kid. I've never attempted to send holiday cards, but I imagine I might procrastinate on it. Maybe not, since it's entirely of my own volition.

I still send Thank you cards. I send them for my kids' birthdays.

http://www.zulily.com/p/black-jazz-s...ml?pos=32&e=1&
Black jazz shoe by Vivobarefoot, for $48.99, today only. I don't like how low they are, would look stupid with socks unless they were funky socks! I love funky socks.

Love the shoes!! I want a pair or 6!!

So Pre excited for you.

ME TOO ME TOO!! Pre-Congrats to you!

Hell, do it on the cheap. Buy a pretty dress (one without the word "wedding" attached to it.) Look up some vows. Pay for the license. Buy food for a barbecue for however many (many places do a bulk discount) and find someone willing to lend out their grill. Beg, borrow and steal folding tables and chairs. Maine's pretty enough you won't need decorations. Depending on the price of the dress, license, and meat, you could get out pretty cheap.

Have one of your close friends go online and get their marriage license. I think the education/test is free. Then he/she will be an officiant and you can make it super cheap and your own without the whole religious aspect if you don't want it. Personally, I got married in a church b/c I didn't know better - I chose my greatgrandma's church b/c that's where she used to take me when I was little and I knew she'd be touched from beyond.

[namelesswonder]

My right hand got a little swollen this morning. I don't know what happened, but I suddenly couldn't get my ring off (on my middle finger). I got it off a little while ago after nibbling on some pomegranate seeds and washing my hands. My hand feels...firm. Like it's been filled with something. But not stiff, as in difficult to bend the joints. Weird.

I made a haircut appointment for tomorrow evening. I'll probably just get bangs, but we'll see. I'm looking forward to it. I thought I could do it myself and do a decent job, but I'd rather make sure it looks good. I don't really know what style I want so I hope "something funky" is good enough direction.

I'm not really hungry. It's difficult to stop eating the pomegranate seeds. Debating whether to make myself eat the sardines or just wait till later/ I get home and my appetite appears.

I have to lug laundry up to my parents' house tonight because Boyfriend's oldest sister is still doing laundry. She lives there! No excuses for slacking off! I do it all in about 3 hours on Monday nights. Hmph. Anyway, not sure how long it's going to take or how many trips I'll have to do in order to finish it all, or at least finish Boyfriend's work clothes.

Borrreeed. And I have a headache.

I bought a Kindle book for my dad on behalf of Baba, but still need to pick something for my mom. She wants some Oxo containers for the pantry and there's a collection on Amazon for $50 (Baba's spending limit). Or I could find something for her office, which is what Baba suggested, but I'd have to go pick out the components. Hm.

[namelesswonder]

Have one of your close friends go online and get their marriage license. I think the education/test is free. Then he/she will be an officiant and you can make it super cheap and your own without the whole religious aspect if you don't want it. Personally, I got married in a church b/c I didn't know better - I chose my greatgrandma's church b/c that's where she used to take me when I was little and I knew she'd be touched from beyond.

If we get married in Maine, you have to be a registered Maine officiant, can't be from out of state. MA is much more lenient about that kind of thing. BUT if we had a friend get ordained online, they could perform the ceremony. Any minister can host the ceremony in Maine, no matter where they're from. The only person I can think of that I'd want to host for us is my godfather, and I don't think he'd want to get ordained. He's religious and I think he would feel like it's wrong to do it outside of his church, you know?

Might come down to something incredibly simple and not even very personalized with a JoP. That's fine. I want signing the documents to be part of it, if possible, so it's all valid right then and there. Otherwise, we'll probably keep the ceremony/signing and reception very separate and maybe not on the same days.