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Thread: Anxiety, depression, laziness...Can the nameless wonder change? page 25

  1. #241
    girlarchitect's Avatar
    girlarchitect is offline Senior Member
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    It wasn't until I was about 20 yrs old that managed to swallow pills at all. Before that I was quite happy mashing them up in jam and saw no reason choke down a pill when I could have it with some lovely strawberry jam. I have warm fuzzy memories of that strange mix of jam and the chalky flavor of aspirin. But then they introduced gel caps ... and I had to learn to swallow. I have to tuck those babies far on the back of my throat and swallow some water - usually that works. some times not. I have never been able to dry swallow pills - and consider it an amazing but impossible for me to achieve trick much like juggling, solving the Rubik cube and whistling (all of which I can't do - and I know this makes me borderline retarded).
    My primal journal that I don't update enough:
    http://www.marksdailyapple.com/forum/thread33293.html

  2. #242
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    ^Hahaha I'm not sure how that would make you borderline retarded. Technically that would mean you'd have to have an IQ below 70? And we all know those tests are bullshit.

    I put pills way back on my tongue and gel-coated or capsules help a LOT. I think one thing is that I've had dry-mouth for such a long time (not helped much by primal yet, but could be the Lexapro) that it makes it difficult for me to swallow normal pills.

    Well, I printed out the request forms. It's pretty cheap to get the copies, since I'm just looking for the documents of one specific time at the hospital, something like $0.65 for the first 100 pages, plus the cost of postage to send in the request obviously. Now to find an envelope...

    I thought I was sad today but I realized I'm actually nostalgic. I keep thinking about wha tfall was like for me when I was in school (university) and my fashion sense then. I really want to cut my hair and dye it something odd right now (but maintaining roots is a bitch). The nostalgia is comfortable, as it's a common occurrence for me, but I keep thinking about a lot of old things that I'd rather let lie.
    Journal on depression/anxiety
    Currently trying to figure out WTF to eat (for IBS-C).

  3. #243
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    I can juggle Rubik's cubes, turning the pivots of the cubes with each pass, and whistle in 4-part harmony. It's just really, really coincidental that you brought this up...

  4. #244
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    Hahaha seriously?! I can whistle and roll my tongue, but I'm pretty sure those are genetic traits. My boyfriend can't whistle, but he can whistle through his teeth!
    Journal on depression/anxiety
    Currently trying to figure out WTF to eat (for IBS-C).

  5. #245
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    Caramel apples & half a tootsie pop are not primal, but the apple was a gift from my mom, and the pop was for donating $ to my old high school's Gay Straight Alliance on Town Day. Lots of walking yesterday. I fell asleep before 10pm.

    My scooter won't start. Today I must keep troubleshooting it. The shop is not open today and tomorrow I have to leave in the morning for NY. I NEED the scooter to be working so I can get to work for the rest of the week. My family is having vehicle problems of their own. FML.
    Journal on depression/anxiety
    Currently trying to figure out WTF to eat (for IBS-C).

  6. #246
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    Went to BJs Wholesale and got tons of meat to freeze & a microwave. Stressed about $.

    My scooter still will not start. We cleaned the spark plug, it seems like the engine/carb are flooding with gas even when we don't give it any. There is a spark. After trying and trying, we tried again and it FINALLY started. Rode it around, felt good, let it sit off for 10 min. Not starting again. Let it sit for another 1/2 hr. Still not starting.

    FML. This is my primary mode of transportation. Tomorrow I need to leave by 10am to get to NY for a pre-trial conference. The scooter repair place opens at 9 and they might charge me to pick the bugger up.
    Journal on depression/anxiety
    Currently trying to figure out WTF to eat (for IBS-C).

  7. #247
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    Sorry sorry sorry in advance.

    Got the violation changed to non-moving. Good. Migraine early this morning plus not having gotten the (now randomly working) scooter from the shop meant I could not go to work. Got reamed out by supervisor because of recent-past conversation about missing work and concerns about real boss in CA not understanding my value to the company since he does not work with me on a day to day basis. I cried. Wanted to tell him to fuck off because I understood the message without 20 minutes of telling me that I didn't need to go to NY to avoid points (and increased insurance $) on my driving record. Sent an email to real boss to see if he would like to talk to me, or if we're cool. I'm doing the best I can right now. This is the first day I've missed since that first talk a few weeks ago. Starting to wonder if I should start looking for a new job, if I'm really okay with this job. I feel more like I'm going to put up with it for 1-2 years and then GTFO.

    Mostly I am SO BORED there. I don't know what to do and nobody seems to have things to do to keep me busy all the time. After 7mos in retail, I got kind of used to being insanely busy for my whole shift.

    Boyfriend keeps tempting me to give in. He wanted to get donuts today. I wish I did not have to spend more money before my next paycheck, but we need some veggies & milk.

    Woe is me and all t hat jazz. 5-HTP makes me pretty sleepy. Haven't noticed any real benefit to it yet.
    Journal on depression/anxiety
    Currently trying to figure out WTF to eat (for IBS-C).

  8. #248
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    Hi, sorry for the work crap. I take my 5htp at 7 or 8 pm. So I am ready to fall asleep at bedtime.

    Donuts? Bad Boyfriend, needs a beating with a meat stick. lol It always surprises me how cranky my husband still gets after a full Primal year when I tell him I can't/won't eat something.
    Paula Primal since 9/24/2010
    "Our greatest foes, and whom we must chiefly combat, are within." Miguel de Cervantes

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    MFP username: MDAPebbles67

  9. #249
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    OOOH! I love the point reward thing. I'm going to have to set a goal and actually keep track (although whenever I think of rewards my mind goes straight to chocolate chip cheesecake, and then I remind myself that's not the kind of reward for this type of good behavior I should be indulging in. thoughts?) Also if it makes anyone feel better I'm genetically incapable of rolling my tongue...it's always been a sore topic for me

  10. #250
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    New clothes are always a nice incentive I think I'm at about 8 points right now. The points were not a good incentive for me over the weekend, but I was pretty stressed out.

    I took the 5HTP around 8:30 last night (50mg) and I was tired within the hour, but I stayed up later than that and ended up feeling more awake after another hour. I woke up before my alarm, but I don't know how early. I think I need to try to get out of bed when I wake up from now on. I would actually have time for kettlebells! I'm not blown away by the 5-HTP at the moment. I don't know if I'm having some PMS or it is making me irritable or it's just the stress.

    My scooter is still being problematic. I got into work late today because I had to get to my parents' house and borrow my dad's stinky diesel. I have to say it's a relief to drive a car sometimes (instead of feeling so vulnerable on the scooter). I almost wish I could afford to lease a car for the winter...

    A lot of stress this week. Work. Money. Transportation. I think I'm due to get my period on Friday. Still don't have detergent so I can't start using my washable pads.

    Last night
    D: sausages & green peppers. The sausages were delicious (steamed in shallow water & then browned all sides), super juicy, but I had intense gas pain afterwards. I have no idea what's in them, they were raw, not pre-cooked. Next time, I'll try to read the packaging before I buy it!
    Today
    Supplements: 5mg Lexapro, B-complex, Fish oil (got capsules, forget the DHA/EPA amounts)), Zyrtec knock-off, Flonase knock-off. Will take 50mg of Megnesium and 5-HTP an hour before bed tonight.
    B: Protein shake (it was GROSS. I don't know if it was the conventional eggs or the lack of almond butter [it's $10.99 at the regular grocery store for 16oz!]) with an egg and an eggy muffin (recipe from SoccerGrok). Definitely need to grease the liners with something next time.
    L: Boiled up 3 eggs this morning. They peeled PERFECTLY, but it took forever to cook them. I hope the yolks are okay. I don't have any veggies right now. Should probably get some celery or something to go with lunch.
    D: ? I'm thinking bacon...

    No exercise lately. I'm giving myself a break here because I've been letting myself get stressed out.
    Journal on depression/anxiety
    Currently trying to figure out WTF to eat (for IBS-C).

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